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Amigone said:
Do you currently have a partner? How long have you been together?



i don't have a partner (a term i use interchangably with spouse) but i do have a boyfriend. we've been together for a little over 6 months and it is, easily, the best and most emotionally rewarding relationship i've ever been in.


[q]I guess I fit in with the U-Haul joke becuase when I came out to my family I ended up moving in with who is now my Fiancee because yay for discrimination against your own daughter, and all that jazz.[/q]


:hug:



Very good topic for a thread. Glad to see another gay U2 fan :)


i think U2 appeals to lots of gay fans -- they speak a very unversalist language, they've never been aggressively heterosexual (or chauvinistic) like many rock bands, they have dabbled in homoeroticism, "Boy" is one of the great "queer" albums (who remembers that thread from EYKIW? ugh ...), "one" is one of the great gay equality songs, and Popmart was clearly influenced by the gay club scene.

i also think Bono would be a perfect template for any Drag King.
 
Doozer61 said:


You know, I don't really know. It amazes me that there is such separation between gays and lesbians. We are all fighting for the same causes. I actually have a few gay men as very good friends but it is mostly through church and since they happen to be in the minority, they get along with the lesbians. But out in the real world, you still find your boy bars and girl bars and its very rare that the worlds collide.

Its a sad reality and I wish I knew why.

Can I quote one of my favorite books?

" ' I watch protests and rallies from across the street. And part of me feels so connected to you all, but I don't know if I'm welcome to join. There's lots of us who are on the outside and we don't want to be. We're getting busted and beaten up. We're dying out here. We need you-but you need us, too.
I don't know what it would take to really change the world. But couldn't we get together and try to figure it out? Couldn't the WE be bigger? Isn't there a way we could help fight each other's battles so that we're not always alone?'"

That is a speech made by the character Jess in Leslie Feinberg's "Stone Butch Blues."

Oh, I have a question:
You have said that you hate the word "faggot" and that no gay character in literature is worth mentioning. Am I to assume then that you're not a fan of Larry Kramer's "Faggots"?
 
blueyedpoet said:
Oh, I have a question:
You have said that you hate the word "faggot" and that no gay character in literature is worth mentioning. Am I to assume then that you're not a fan of Larry Kramer's "Faggots"?



no, you should not assume that.

simply because one deplores a word when used as a slur does not mean that the word should never be spoken. in fact, the worst thing you could do would be to ignore the existence of such slurs (along with the N-word, the C-word, or whatever else) and not discuss them and then hopefully dismantle their power.

i am not terribly familiar with "Faggots" or with Larry Kramer, so i really can't comment on either.
 
Originally posted by Irvine511 they have dabbled in homoeroticism, "Boy" is one of the great "queer" albums (who remembers that thread from EYKIW? ugh ...)

:whistle:
 
I hear ya.
Faggots is a satiric and critical novel about the "gay lifestyle" in New York city immediately following Stonewall (around the 1970s). Larry Kramer is a prolific writer who will probably be remembered best as the organizer of ACT UP!
As with all satirical works, this novel is really controversial because he really is criticizing the middle to upper class white gay male who tried to fuck as many as he could. The main character claims to be on this journey towards love - he's determined to find it - but, he takes what he can get, cause it's all that he can find, but he knows there something more to use our boys' words.

Thanks for this thread. I know I'm just echoing what others have already said, but thanks anyway. It's thus far been a funny and still insightful thread.

Irvine511 said:




no, you should not assume that.

simply because one deplores a word when used as a slur does not mean that the word should never be spoken. in fact, the worst thing you could do would be to ignore the existence of such slurs (along with the N-word, the C-word, or whatever else) and not discuss them and then hopefully dismantle their power.

i am not terribly familiar with "Faggots" or with Larry Kramer, so i really can't comment on either.
 
blueyedpoet said:
I hear ya.
Faggots is a satiric and critical novel about the "gay lifestyle" in New York city immediately following Stonewall (around the 1970s). Larry Kramer is a prolific writer who will probably be remembered best as the organizer of ACT UP!



he's the bald guy with the overalls, right?

i've heard him mentioned in context in various queer articles and criticism that i've encountered, but i really can't comment on him specifically, except that i know he's a polarizing figure -- no one has a mild opinion on him, either way, it seems.

maybe i will check it out.
 
yeah he's extreme, but I think he's a fantastic writer and he cares about people.
Anyways, I've got another set of questions.
Do you feel that media portrayals of homosexuals are at all fair and realistic? Or, are homosexuals still by and large used as the "funny" characters?
 
:hmm: Kramer sounds sort of like Andrea Dworkin's queer soul brother.
 
yolland said:
:hmm: Kramer sounds sort of like Andrea Dworkin's queer soul brother.



an, Andrea Dworkin -- a woman so left that she and the right found places of commonality (no porn! ever! :angry:)
 
blueyedpoet said:
Do you feel that media portrayals of homosexuals are at all fair and realistic? Or, are homosexuals still by and large used as the "funny" characters?



it really depends.

in mainstream cinema and TV, gay characters tend to be sidekicks and jesters, they are milked for laughs and they are never, ever allowed to have an on-screen same-sex kiss, let alone actually have sex. the gay-best-friend seems to have replaced the bitter-best-friend as the female protaganist's companion in your average some of it depends on context -- Jack, of "Will and Grace," seems to allow the audience to be in on the joke, and that while he's a one-dimensional stereotype, he's damn funny, and Karen and Will and Grace are all one-dimensional (and used to be damn funny). i'd say that the Queer Eye guys are actually a little more offensive -- while it's great that everyone loved them (for a little while), there is something slightly off-putting about it, it's almost like a minstrel show with gay people showing up to use their super powers to help hapless straight men be more adept to modern life.

but then again, anything that shows homosexuals as something other than miserable loners or drag queens or AIDS victims must be viewed as progress.

the best depiction of gay people that i've seen were Keith and David on "six feet under" -- they had complex emotional lives and were real and flawed and did stupid things and did wonderful things.

i suppose all i want is to see gay people portrayed not as only AIDS victims (though you can't ignore AIDS), not only as jesters (though gay irony and humor are real things), not only as best friends to females (though gay men and straight women get along famously), not only as saints (there are wonderful gay people), not only as miserable and bitter (there are miserable and bitter people), but as all of these things and many more that are both connected to sexuality yet utterly independent of it.

but then again, it's difficult for anyone to be accurately represented on film or in television.

so, it's better than it used to be, but there's still a ways to go.
 
What do you think about adoption?
I mean, if you wanna live with someone of your sex no matter as long as they both are conscious and mature...but...
when you think about having a children?
What do you think?
Many people think of of it like a right,
while actually is rather a responsability to me...
Do you believe that exist absolute right
(for example, the family as a ground basement of society) and relative right
(for example tolerance, that as we all know ahas sometimes limit...ok being tolerant, but depends on what you do...:wink: )
ok sorry if i might i have been seeming
too "aggressive" but i wanna know an opinion by someone i consider intelligent...take it as a provocation...:wink:
BTW Irvine, wich part of DC do you live in? I spent there some times in the past..

Ciao,
Tom
 
tommyvill said:
What do you think about adoption?
I mean, if you wanna live with someone of your sex no matter as long as they both are conscious and mature...but...
when you think about having a children?
What do you think?
Many people think of of it like a right,
while actually is rather a responsability to me...
Do you believe that exist absolute right
(for example, the family as a ground basement of society) and relative right
(for example tolerance, that as we all know ahas sometimes limit...ok being tolerant, but depends on what you do...:wink: )
ok sorry if i might i have been seeming
too "aggressive" but i wanna know an opinion by someone i consider intelligent...take it as a provocation...:wink:



for my thoughts on adoption, please see this thread: http://forum.interference.com/t155354.html



BTW Irvine, wich part of DC do you live in? I spent there some times in the past.


i live on the border between the Mt. Pleasant and Columbia Heights neighborhoods.
 
Yes Eric Bana is quite handsome, I'd still have to go with the Clooney though. Honorable mentions to Jake (but I beg him to fix the eyebrows :wink: ) and Terrence Howard.

And I think Joaquin is gorgeous but something seemed a little off :hmm:
 
MrsSpringsteen said:
Yes Eric Bana is quite handsome, I'd still have to go with the Clooney though. Honorable mentions to Jake (but I beg him to fix the eyebrows :wink: ) and Terrence Howard.

And I think Joaquin is gorgeous but something seemed a little off :hmm:

My girlfriend, one of my best friends (who by and by is becoming less the typical homophobic conservative christian) and I spent the entire evening judging both males and females. It was a blast.
I thought Keira Knightley looked divine; Nicole Kidman has to be one of the most gorgeous people of all time; Heith Ledger was adorable; Jon Stewart was handsome as always; and, Tim Burton was undefinable.
 
I thought of another question. :hyper: It might have already been answered, but I want to be lazy and not check.

I was on recess duty this morning, observing the terribly awkward and painful rituals that go on between sixth grade boys and girls. :shudder: They can't help it, poor things.

As I was observing this, I wondered about you specifically, Irvine. (Actually melon as well.) Did you go through this with girls when you were reaching adolescence? Or did you know already? Did you go through the rituals, teasing, etc. just to be part of the crowd, lessening your chances of discovery this way? Or were you unsure or confused about your feelings?

This seems like a very personal question to me. :frown: Budding sexuality is so personal.


The "Family Life" films are next week, so the upper grades are reeling already. Next week should be interesting. :|
 
Irvine did already address the issue of camp once in this thread.

Regarding the comment preceding that, *ETA: Just got (re)banned :happy: so don't even bother responding.
 
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martha said:
As I was observing this, I wondered about you specifically, Irvine. (Actually melon as well.) Did you go through this with girls when you were reaching adolescence? Or did you know already? Did you go through the rituals, teasing, etc. just to be part of the crowd, lessening your chances of discovery this way? Or were you unsure or confused about your feelings?



i think this is where the pantomime begins.

i do know some gay guys who knew they were gay from a very early age, but i don't think anyone has an adult understanding of sexuality at an early age. i think some boys feel "different," as i certainly did, but i think it's still to early to be able to attribute these differences as part of a different sexual orientation than 90-95% of your classmates.

in 5th and 6th grade, when the genders are first starting to notice each other, i definitely started to "notice" as well -- but i think it was more curiosity, like discovering another culture, as opposed to it being genuinely pre-sexual. i think you know that's what everyone else is doing, and so you go along with it. i was certainly excited about my first "boy/girl" parties, and i remember getting the message now that i was about 12 that i should be starting to think about girls and see if they wanted to "go out" -- and i was fine with all that, even excited about it. i knew this was what i was supposed to do, and it was like trying on a pair of pants, only you don't yet know that they don't fit. or, that there's a pair of pants that fits you better.

what i do remember about the years between 5th and 8th grade was taking a very, very keen interest in mature men's bodies. i'm sure some of this was trying to get a sense of what was going to happen to me (and to pause, i am right now reliving all of the terrible, horrible, awkward awkward awkward moments that everyone sufferst hrough .... how much better it is to be an adult, no? oh, Martha, those poor 6th graders ...), but i think my interest was much more overtly sexual than a heterosexual boy's interest might have been, but i certainly wasn't yet aware that this was different, since it's not like boys talk about this with one another, it's all going on internally.

in the summers between 7th and 8th grade, as well as 8th and 9th grade, i sort of had girlfriends, and we did the 13 year old "making out" thing, and i was fine with that, but again, looking back, it was more of an acting out of a role that i knew i was supposed to play and taking pride in that, as opposed to feeling a genuine sense of connection and attachment and perhaps fulfillment that heterosexuals might feel when they take their first cautious steps into physical intimacy with one another. and for a while, this was fine. it wasn't until high school that i began to realize that something simply wasn't right about the courtship rituals of jr. high and high school, that i related to girls in a different manner than my peers. for me, there were no parting clouds and moments of illumination, it was a very long, very gradual process of genuinely authentic self-discovery.

so, i would say that your average 6th grader isn't aware (or maybe they are now, i was in 6th grade in 1990 and the definition of "gay" that i understood was of a sissy, a girlie-man, which i wasn't ... or at least not really, i might not have liked to fight or wrestle or play in the dirt, but i was well aware that i was a boy) yet of how he/she might be different, and at this point they're probably just thrilled and excited at the curiosity of the other gender as well as starting to be able to play out these romantic gender roles that are so thoroughly celebrated in all of popular culture (to the point where, frankly, it's really oppressive).

at least for me.
 
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Queer Eye

Ignore this is you've already answered this (I havn't been able to check on this thread recently :wink: ) but I'm wondering if you have an opinion of a show like "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy." Do you think it builds some bridges and breaks down sterotypes? Reinforces sterotypes?

:wave:
 
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