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Old 05-01-2005, 11:45 AM   #16
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I do remember this. I'm glad you're better with it. How long has it been since you've been divorced? Do you like his partner?

I went to the wedding of a friend thinking he seemed awfully gay to me. About 7 years later (is that the magic number, lol) they split up, and THEN he came out. He maintains to this day that he didn't know he was gay until after they broke up and he began "experimenting." I think that's bullshit and so did she. It's now been 15 years since he came out and she never spoke to him again. He and I remain close but she disappeared. I'm still waiting for him to 'fess up that he knew all along.
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:22 PM   #17
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Did you ever find out/wondered why he married you in the first place? Surely he knew he couldn't go around with this charade forever...
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:07 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally posted by joyfulgirl
How long has it been since you've been divorced? Do you like his partner?
it's been about six years since we've been divorced.

i can't really say that i know his partner well enough to like or dislike him. he certainly seems like a nice enough guy. i did get into it with him on the phone once, when he tried to tell me what he thought was best for my daughter. he later called and apologized.

they live in san fransisco, while i live in southern nevada, so it's hard to form any type of solid relationship with the two of them, but we try.
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:11 PM   #19
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Quote:
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Did you ever find out/wondered why he married you in the first place?
he was simply in denial. he recently told me that he could have stayed married and had more children, but that he felt "pressure" to come out.

yeah, i'm still trying to figure that one out, too.

sounds to me like he's STILL in denial.
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Old 05-01-2005, 02:50 PM   #20
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Is he a decent father to his child?
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Old 05-01-2005, 03:12 PM   #21
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was he a republican?

seriously, sorry u had to go thru this ms. bgirls184.

divorces are icky even "amicable" ones.

db9
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Old 05-01-2005, 05:54 PM   #22
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Quote:
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Is he a decent father to his child?
no. he's not.

he has only visited twice in the last two years, and if you asked him what his daughter's favorite bands, tv shows, or hobbies were, most likely he wouldn't know. and i would bet my life that he couldn't name two of her friends or one of her teachers.

their relationship is based mostly on phone calls, when she chooses to take them.

he has never been to a graduation, or a cheerleading competition, heard her play her clarinet in the school band, or seen her in a school play. and indirectly, this has everything to do with the fact that he's gay, because he chooses to live so far away, "in a city where he can be more open with his lifestyle."

those are his words, not mine.
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Old 05-01-2005, 06:57 PM   #23
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That's too bad.

Bad fathers fuck up their children in so many different ways. She's lucky to have you.

It sounds as if all he's ever cared about is himself.
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Old 05-01-2005, 07:22 PM   #24
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^ ditto
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Old 05-01-2005, 08:10 PM   #25
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^

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Old 05-01-2005, 08:13 PM   #26
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Wow, bg, I never knew.

Chelsea is damn lucky to have such a kickass mom.
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Old 05-01-2005, 08:24 PM   #27
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^ ditto

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Old 05-02-2005, 12:57 AM   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by martha
That's too bad.

Bad fathers fuck up their children in so many different ways. She's lucky to have you.

It sounds as if all he's ever cared about is himself.
Yep. Some people just should never be parents.


And I don't mean that because he's gay, there are plenty of sucky heterosexual dads around too (and bad mom's of all types too).

But I do feel that one good parent can have a huge positive impact in a child's life.
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Old 05-02-2005, 01:31 AM   #29
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Did he even replace that iron?


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Old 05-02-2005, 06:45 AM   #30
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wow, this is something i never knew. bg!

sounds like you are doing a great job being the best mom you can.

I have that "gaydar" feeling about a couple of people I know and I see them struggling to have hetero relationships and I just want to scream "Come out, already". Because I know that they will do the same thing.
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