(you may have recvd this via e-mail allllllready...just not from me)
A woman went shopping with her teen daughter for a few hours. Her frustration at the crowds grew throughout the day, and capped when she got onto an elevator and was smooshed into the rear of the car. She exclaimed to her daughter "whoever came up with this Christmas thing should be shot and hung by his toes."
A voice from the front corner of elevator answered: "Don't worry, he has already been crucified."
OK...not funny.