OH man...i've been meaning to post a rant in Confessionals, but i guess this will do too:
1. I am sick of when everoyone who know about it and seems to have 5 minutes of time asks : "So how's the job search going?"
As if it wasn't awkward and embarassing enough i'm still looking. It's going, i DON'T know when i'll find it and GEE, don't you think i'll tell you on my own when i do?
2. At interviews for a job, i am sick of interviewer asking "so what happened at college?"
Um, yeah - i really WON'T feel embarassed and humiliated and 2 feet small when i have to explain over and over again.
3. I think of my primary school college and high school friends and whenever i catch up with them or we have reunions the vast majority have like serious jobs, live on their own, have bf's and gf's - and then it feels like
"is my life passing me by? am i really gonna end up a freak and a weirdo?"
4. I hated the awkwardness when i was filling out this form at a job interview and there was a question "how soon do you plan having children?" and there were several answers.
I mean...how the heck should i know?!? I don't even know when and if i'll find someone special, let alone the C word or the M word for that matter. I have no clue, so don't bug me with it. It could be years, though there are times when i would have opted for "never".
5. I am getting tired of walking on the streets, seeing happy couples and feeling a little twich in my heart every time and think:
"Will i ever find something like that myself?"
6. I really think i will have to change my apperance and somewhat my personality if i want to get anywhere, because being myself just doesn't seem to cut it. It sucks not being a party girl and not a pretty face.
The part "and in my mind, all the time, i know that's not enough" from ES really resonated with me: how do i know my best is keeping up with people's expectations? Particularly my own?
7. You know what's the worst part about it though? That i'm the kind of person that makes plans and resolutions...and than very rarely (if ever) actually does something about it.