Mysterious distance between Bono & Ali

[corner]

If Bono "could never take a chance, of losing love to find romance" why does he insist on being such a lecherous flirt?
Assuming I was a famous front man for a rock band and I acted like Bono (both on & offstage), I KNOW my girlfriend would dump me faster than you could say 'woohoo'. Does that make her harsh, or is it fair on Ali for Bono to behave the way he does?
Just playing the devil's advocate here folks....interested to hear what y'all think?
I know if I were in Bono's shoes, I wouldn't be able to sing AMAAW with any sincerity or clear conscience. Not that I'm suggesting that's the reason they haven't played it so far, of course

 

[Liesje]

1) I think your question is approaching the fine line of what's acceptable for discussion according to the FAQ (their opinion, not mine)

2) You can't say for sure that that line from AMAAW specifically refers to Bono's relationship w/ Ali

3) I've never met Ali, but from what I've read about her and read her saying, she doesn't sound like the type of person what would put up with even 5 second of bullshitting from Bono, so I'm not concerned when it comes to their relationship.

4) As "flirtatious" as Bono might seem w/ fans, have you ever seen pictures of him and Ali? They're practically joined at the hip!

 

[pax]

I'm not sure that the question violates the FAQs. And it's something I myself have often wondered, particularly with the passionate embraces and kisses you sometimes see between Bono and the "dancing girls."

 

[HelloAngel]

I agree - sometimes it's best not to take every U2 song as autobiography or in its literal context.

 

[MsGiggles]

1) I think your question is approaching the fine line of what's acceptable for discussion according to the FAQ (their opinion, not mine)

2) You can't say for sure that that line from AMAAW specifically refers to Bono's relationship w/ Ali

3) I've never met Ali, but from what I've read about her and read her saying, she doesn't sound like the type of person what would put up with even 5 second of bullshitting from Bono, so I'm not concerned when it comes to their relationship.

4) As "flirtatious" as Bono might seem w/ fans, have you ever seen pictures of him and Ali? They're practically joined at the hip!

Agree and I think they're personal life shouldn't be a topic for discussion....

 

[Liesje]

I'm not sure that the question violates the FAQs. And it's something I myself have often wondered, particularly with the passionate embraces and kisses you sometimes see between Bono and the "dancing girls."

It seems as though Bono's been behaving himself much better on this tour, hehe. Perhaps Ali's presence has something to do with it? I mean, he still has girls on stage to dance, but nothing quite like the Melpop incident, or the chick in Beth's avatar! The one time a girl did try to cop a feel, he was saying "no", lol.

OK, I need to stop talking about this b/c it seems weird....

 

[BVS]

I think if someone dumps you just for flirting is insecure, as long as it's just flirting and the real flirting is still happening at home.

I think flirting comes with the job and anyone who marries a front man like Bono, has to understand that. It takes a certain type of person to do that.

I don't think the song has anything to do with this question.

 

[corianderstem]

I'm not sure that the question violates the FAQs. And it's something I myself have often wondered, particularly with the passionate embraces and kisses you sometimes see between Bono and the "dancing girls."

Bear in mind that Bono is a performer, and a lot of what happens on stage is part of the performance.

 

[LarryMullen's POPAngel]

Re: Re: Mysterious distance between Bono & Ali

I think if someone dumps you just for flirting is insecure, as long as it's just flirting and the real flirting is still happening at home.

I think flirting comes with the job and anyone who marries a front man like Bono, has to understand that. It takes a certain type of person to do that.

I don't think the song has anything to do with this question.

Well said.

 

[U2girl]

FAQ: "Posting about the bands' private life, questioning their marriages or sexuality is not allowed."

It's his rock star persona that you see on stage.

 

[BluRmGrl]

I've always understood that Ali is a strong, secure woman - she realizes some of B's behavior just comes with the territory, and she knows who he comes home to at night, so she's perfectly secure to let him put on his little act.

She's often been quoted (I believe) as saying that she wanted her own life, independent of B's... meaning that she wants to follow her own interest, not just be a trophy wife... I don't think that she'd tolerate any truly inappropriate behavior from him for one second.

My theory is that she sees things the same as I do w/Mr. Blu: I completely, utterly, wholly trust him - and that's whether I'm in his same vincinity or not. I trust him when I can see him chatting up another woman. I trust him when I see him dancing with another woman. I trust him even when I don't see him doing these things. Am I naieve? Maybe. But I didn't marry the man to have to babysit him every second of the day. My trust in him allows him a lot more leeway than some signifcant others get... he realizes this & respects me enough to not step over the boundries that we've agreed upon. Of course I have no way of knowing for sure, but I'd bet good money that's the agreement between Ali & Bono.

 

[BrownEyedBoy]

I think she's an angel and a very secure person.

She knows that the whole thing Bono does is an act, and part of the persona/performance even though Bono probably has women throwing themselves at him all the time he is level headed enough to know his true "love" is waiting for him at home.

I think it's a remarkable story and a great example to a lot of people. I'm glad this thread hasn't been close because it's a just a beautiful story of two people who love each other and trust each other.

It's great.

Congratulations to Bono and Ali for keeping it up this long.

 

[Miroslava]

Bear in mind that Bono is a performer, and a lot of what happens on stage is part of the performance.

You mean he's not in love with me and he's not dumping Ali to marry me?








Like it's been said. What happens on stage, and even the coy flirtation that goes on outside of it such as the meet and greet lines is nothing but part of him doing his job... And well, I'm guessing he would have been a terrible flirt even if he had never become Bono of U2... Some people just have that personality...

And from a moderator stand point, I believe this topic is still ok but we'll be watching

 

[RocknRollKitty]

I love that line "I could never take a chance, on losing love to find romance." That means he will NOT dump Ali for some quickie, or some fun fling, he knows he has love, and he's not ruining it by being a cheating cad. He 'flirts' with lots of girls as a rock star, but it's not real, and it's ALI who has him in the bed at night, she's got him, his kids, his money, his heart, his body. What does she care? Lucky lady!

 

[corner]

I think this song has a lot to do with Bono & Ali's relationship.

Quoted from Q magazine Nov. 2004:


'A thread running through the record is Bono musing on the nature of marrige. The protagonist is A Man and A woman, for example, ponders "forever, faith, sex and fear, and all the things that keep us here", before concluding he could "never take a chance on losing love to find romance". Is he referring to himself here?

"It is personal, yes" says Bono'



The song is clearly more than an abstract relationship to other people's relationships.
Also, I didn't really make myself very clear earlier on when I used the word "flirting". Obviously, flirting by itself, never did anybody any harm. What I really meant was the close physical contact that Bono extablishes with members of the opposite sex (kissing, caressing etc.).

I don't agree with the point by corianderstem about one's behaviour being justified because one is a performer. So is Bono's onstage performance a big act? Where do you draw the line? Would you be happy enough if Bono singled you out in the crowd and poked fun at you, because you were confident it was all part of the performance?

I don't want to pry into Bono & Ali's relationship. I was just interested in whether you thought Bono's on and offstage antics were cool, in light of the fact he's a married man.

 

[beau2ifulday]

Bear in mind that Bono is a performer, and a lot of what happens on stage is part of the performance.

Bono, in general, seems to be somewhat of a performer. I'm sure that he's nothing like how we see him when he's around his family. I remember reading something from Melpop (I think) a while back about the time he gave her a lift in Dublin that just reaffirmed this - he made a comment about how he was on stage. I'm not going to start quoting, because I can't remember it accurately, but i'm sure those of you who have read it know what i'm referring to.

 

[david]

I think they're quite a happy and comfortable couple.

I don't know how they did it though considering the fact that throughout most of their marriage Bono was always on the road.

But he married his highschool sweet heart and has had many kids with her and they've established a life and they seem like they genuinly love and admire each other.

Aint love the sweetest thing?

 

[RocknRollKitty]

While I do NOT take every song as literal about them personally, and believe most are not, I think this one is. Not only that one line I already commented on but the part that goes 'brown eyed girl across the street...I thought this is the one for me, but she was already mine"

 

[Shawn Bonneau]

Bono and Ali are madly in love I am sure. However, I noticed Monday that Bono arrived two vans in front of the car Ali was in. Why as Ali not in the van Bono was in?

SMB

 

[corianderstem]

I don't agree with the point by corianderstem about one's behaviour being justified because one is a performer. So is Bono's onstage performance a big act? Where do you draw the line? Would you be happy enough if Bono singled you out in the crowd and poked fun at you, because you were confident it was all part of the performance?

I think what I meant was more along the lines of this: when you marry a rock star (or one who's on their way to being one), you're going to have to put up with rock star antics.

Whether those antics are part of the stage, "rock star" act, or whether they cross the line into unacceptable behavior is another story. I don't think Bono's actions on stage (or what we know of his off stage antics) cross that line.

As for Bono singling me out and poking fun at me ... I guess it depends on what you mean by "poking fun." Is he laughing with me? Then yeah, that's great. Is he laughing AT me? That doesn't seem like something Bono would do.

But that's getting into another topic, I think, and now I'm rambling.

 

[Shawn Bonneau]

To be honest, this is non of our business. Why do we discuss such things? Why did we discuss Edge's personal issues earlier this year? Let's all fuck off and stay out of their lives. This thread should be locked. This to me is wrong. This is how rumors get started.

SMB

 

[Miroslava]

To be honest, this is non of our business. Why do we discuss such things? Why did we discuss Edge's personal issues earlier this year? Let's all fuck off and stay out of their lives. This thread should be locked. This to me is wrong. This is how rumors get started.

SMB

I'd tend to agree more with you if you hadn't asked the question you did earlier in this very thread. Those are the types of speculations that could cause this thread to get close. But again, we're fine for now...

 

[Shawn Bonneau]

Yeah I know, i stated that, but then realized, why the hell are we discussing this. So, I will not deny I am guilty of this bad idea.

SMB

 

[gareth brown]

i think it like this...if we took every song's lyrics at face value and assumed they were ALL about Bono/U2's personal experiences, I'd have no reason not to assume that they had pretty screwed lives...!

 

[BVS]

I think this song has a lot to do with Bono & Ali's relationship.

Of course it's about them, but that's not what you said in the original thread. You alluded to the fact that the flirting and the song had anything to do with each other and they don't.

I don't agree with the point by corianderstem about one's behaviour being justified because one is a performer. So is Bono's onstage performance a big act? Where do you draw the line? Would you be happy enough if Bono singled you out in the crowd and poked fun at you, because you were confident it was all part of the performance?

A great artist seduces it's audience. Any musician worth it's salt will tell you this. There's a public Bono and a private Bono. Public Bono has part of him that's performance, doesn't mean it's not real. These girls that get pulled up on stage don't really think they have a chance to go home with him, if they do they are dellusional, but it doesn't mean the affection isn't real. It has to do with intent, if Bono's intent was to turn them on so he could go to bed with them it would be completely different, but that's not the intent.

 

[corner]

Ah....sorry if my thread seems a bit gossipy/intrusive/insensitive. I didn't mean that at all. I don't want to know the ins or outs of Bono's (or the rest of the band, for that matter) personal life, including his marrige. I love the song AMAAW, particularly for the lyrical content.
The reason I started this thread was because the song had me wondering how Bono would define "never take a chance" and whether his job & lifestyle reflect that. I didn't want to get into personal gory details of him and Ali....sorry if I offended anyone.

 

[david]

Speaking of AMAAW has anyone heard the acoustic version yet?

 

[RocknRollKitty]

Bono and Ali are madly in love I am sure. However, I noticed Monday that Bono arrived two vans in front of the car Ali was in. Why as Ali not in the van Bono was in?

SMB

Well, he is the one performing, the star gets special treatment. Their families never ride with them on concert night. Think about this, he could have left her home, or he could have some cheap tart in the car!

 

[corner]

Of course it's about them, but that's not what you said in the original thread. You alluded to the fact that the flirting and the song had anything to do with each other and they don't.

As I tried to explain before, I shouldn't have used the word 'flirting'. I do believe though, that the lyric refers to his reluctance in jeopordising a relationship, by behaving a certain way around other women (flirting might be an example).

A great artist seduces it's audience. It has to do with intent, if Bono's intent was to turn them on so he could go to bed with them it would be completely different, but that's not the intent.

I don't think that's his intent either, otherwise he's pretty crap at pulling. I do think it is his intent to create a certain sexual atmosphere by getting girls on stage, and that this could be deemed 'taking a chance' when one is in a relationship. Argueing that its a performance, just doesn't cut it for me. For what higher purpose would he do this for, rather than for his or the girls' benefit?

 

[corner]

Speaking of AMAAW has anyone heard the acoustic version yet?

Nope - can't wait though Its funny to think that it will be more acoustic than the album version....I guess it'll be stripped back to the bare bones of vocals and acoustic guitar, without anything else?