Afghanistan's Fall TV Line-up

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Eliv8

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Afghanistan's Fall TV Line-up
MONDAYS:
8:00 - "Husseinfeld"
8:30 - "Mad About Everything"
9:00 - "Suddenly Sanctions"
9:30 - "The Brian Benben Bin Laden Show"
10:00 - "Allah McBeal"
TUESDAYS:
8:00 - "Wheel of Terror and Fortune"
8:30 - "The Price is Right If Usama Says Its Right"
9:00 - "Children Are Forbidden From Saying The Darndest Things"
9:30 - "Afganistans Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers"
10:00 - "Buffy The Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer"
WEDNESDAYS:
8:00 - "U.S. Military Secrets Revealed"
8:30 - "Bowling For Food"
9:00 - "Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pita Bread"
9:30 - "Just Shoot Everyone"
10:00 - "Veilwatch"
THURSDAYS:
8:00 - "Matima Loves Chachi"
8:30 - "M*U*S*T*A*S*H"
9:00 - "Veronicas Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses and Veils"
9:30 - "My Two Baghdads"
10:00 - "Diagnosis: Heresy"
FRIDAYS:
8:00 - "Judge Laden"
8:30 - "Funniest Super 8 Home Movies"
9:00 - "Who Wants To Execute A Multimillionare"
9:30 - "Achmeds Creek"
10:00 - "No-witness News"
11:00 ? ?Music Videos? Featuring B52 and U2



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Imagine
//oo\\


http://eliv8.fws1.com/
 
Hmmmm...i don't think neither jokes about WTC horror are funny, neither are jokes about a bombarded nation.
But that's just me.

------------------
"It's about finding your way into the music." - Edge

"Something inside said this could be everything in your life." - Bono

"U2 as a band does things nobody one else can. I think that is a very powerful thing." - Larry

"Adam believed in the band before anyone did." - Bono
 
I thought it was hilarious!

Thanks Eliv8, I need some laughs these days
biggrin.gif
 
Originally posted by U2girl:
Hmmmm...i don't think neither jokes about WTC horror are funny, neither are jokes about a bombarded nation.
But that's just me.


U2Girl give us a break. If joking is how we want to easy our pain then we will. I think it is funny. I am tired of being sad and depressed. Next thing we are going to hear is:
How can you all go to a U2 concert in the states when you are bombing another country.
How can you go to sport events.
How dare we lauph at all.

As I said give us a freaken break.
 
Originally posted by U2girl:
Hmmmm...i don't think neither jokes about WTC horror are funny, neither are jokes about a bombarded nation.
But that's just me.


Krasno!

CK
 
Originally posted by U2Byrd:
U2Girl give us a break. If joking is how we want to easy our pain then we will. I think it is funny. I am tired of being sad and depressed. Next thing we are going to hear is:
How can you all go to a U2 concert in the states when you are bombing another country.
How can you go to sport events.
How dare we lauph at all.

As I said give us a freaken break.

agreed!

------------------
"I'm gonna start a day care!"-Bono
 
How about Kill and Grace? or an Afghanistan version of Cheers? lol

------------------
"I'm gonna start a day care!"-Bono
 
Originally posted by U2Byrd:
U2Girl give us a break. If joking is how we want to easy our pain then we will. I think it is funny. I am tired of being sad and depressed. Next thing we are going to hear is:
How can you all go to a U2 concert in the states when you are bombing another country.
How can you go to sport events.
How dare we lauph at all.

As I said give us a freaken break.

Calm down, i was just stating my opinion. It's not like it will prevent you from laughing at the first post in this thread, right?

And i never said people should not be joking. I just don't think that the joke should be at the expense of Afghanistans-especially the civilians. (who are not responsible for the terrorist attacks, and who HAVE been killed in these bombings)

------------------
"It's about finding your way into the music." - Edge

"Something inside said this could be everything in your life." - Bono

"U2 as a band does things nobody one else can. I think that is a very powerful thing." - Larry

"Adam believed in the band before anyone did." - Bono

[This message has been edited by U2girl (edited 11-07-2001).]
 
oh great. Here we go again.

------------------
"I'm gonna start a day care!"-Bono
 
Very ironic - as the "civilized" West bombs maims and kills innocent civilians, we superinpose our North American culture over theirs while poking fun at their stereotypes.

Utterly, hilariously, deplorably sad.

You want humour - why don't you watch CNN, NBC, ABC, CBS, or any other major news network and laugh at the coverage your getting of America's "just cause" -...now that's funny!

"Outside it's America"

Dalton
 
Originally posted by Dalton Brother:
Very ironic - as the "civilized" West bombs maims and kills innocent civilians, we superinpose our North American culture over theirs while poking fun at their stereotypes.

Utterly, hilariously, deplorably sad.

You want humour - why don't you watch CNN, NBC, ABC, CBS, or any other major news network and laugh at the coverage your getting of America's "just cause" -...now that's funny!

"Outside it's America"

Dalton

Laughter is the best medicine.

Lighten up!

------------------
"I'm gonna start a day care!"-Bono
 
Dalton:

Maybe if the Taliban wouldn't "ban" everything from comedy shows to U2 CDs, their television programming wouldn't be the butt of everyone's jokes?

~U2Alabama
 
Originally posted by Dalton Brother:
Very ironic - as the "civilized" West bombs maims and kills innocent civilians, we superinpose our North American culture over theirs while poking fun at their stereotypes.

Utterly, hilariously, deplorably sad.

You want humour - why don't you watch CNN, NBC, ABC, CBS, or any other major news network and laugh at the coverage your getting of America's "just cause" -...now that's funny!

"Outside it's America"

Dalton

Hand over Bin Laden and the bombs will stop.

CK
 
Ha, yeah, right.....the bombing will stop...is that the funny part of your joke.

Why not "lighten up" and read this argument?


The Kitchener-Waterloo Record, Final ed.
Insight, Wednesday, October 10, 2001, p. A19

War on Afghanistan is illegal

Peter Eglin And Debbie Chapman
SPECIAL TO THE RECORD

The first phase of Operation Enduring Freedom -- the assault on the Taliban
government and Osama bin Laden's terrorist network in Afghanistan led by the
military forces of the United States and United Kingdom supported by other
coalition countries including Canada -- is immoral, illegal and, in terms of
its announced ends, irrational. In terms of its real ends, however, it may
be seen as rational.

First, the assault is immoral. It is described by its perpetrators as
"retaliation." The Gage Canadian Dictionary defines retaliation as "the
repaying a wrong, injury, etc. with another; return of like for like." It is
an elementary moral principle that to repay one wrong with another is itself
wrong; it is immoral. In games and sports, including professional sports
like soccer and hockey, we penalize acts of retaliation. They are against
the rules, they are wrong.

Civilized societies have banned capital punishment, that is, the taking of a
life for a life by the state. This is not primarily because we have learned
that capital punishment does not deter, or because it is characteristically
carried out in a racially discriminatory way, or because there is no remedy
for mistakes, but because it is immoral. It is wrong to engage in
cold-blooded murder. Capital punishment is cold-blooded murder.

So it is with the bombing and shooting being carried out by the U.S.-U.K.
armed forces, following the orders of their military and political
commanders. These actions are designed to kill Taliban soldiers and bin
Laden followers and to destroy their military property. They are murderous.
Insofar as they are retaliation, they are wrong. Their perpetrators are
acting immorally. The point is elementary, but it is invisible in public
commentary from politicians, state officials, journalists, religious
figures, experts and academic intellectuals.

Second, the assault is illegal. It is against the law. The use of force by a
state or states in pursuit of their political ends is against the law. It
has been so since the end of the Second World War. When the United Nations
was formed, and its charter written and adopted, the use of force by states
for their political ends was outlawed. It was a momentous development in
human history, the outlawing of war.

Of course, all states appreciated that there would be occasion when force
would have to be used in the international arena, say to counter some
aggressor. And so they provided for that possibility by laying out the rules
and regulations for doing so in the UN charter. States agreed that the only
body authorized to order the use of force against some member state was the
Security Council of the United Nations -- not the United States government,
the British government, the government of Canada or the North Atlantic
Treaty Organization (whatever its treaty says, in Article 5 or any other
article). The only legal body is the Security Council.

Moreover, it being recognized that to use international force is a grievous
and enormously consequential action, the articles of the charter very
carefully lay out the steps to be followed. It has to be demonstrated that
all other means -- diplomatic negotiations, economic sanctions -- have been
exhausted before there can be recourse to the use of force.

Furthermore, the determination that the originating complaint warrants an
international response at all is to be made in the Security Council alone.
Member states do not have the right to decide that for themselves. As
regards the decision to attack Afghanistan, and the carrying out of that
decision, it has been glaringly obvious that the UN Security Council has
been totally ignored. That is, the only legally constituted body authorized
to use force in such situations has been bypassed. The U.S. and British
governments have taken the law into their own hands. They have reverted to
the pre-civilized principle that might makes right. They have become
vigilantes. They have become rogue states. Their actions are illegal.

It may be countered -- and it has been proposed by the U.S. leadership --
that Operation Enduring Freedom is an act of self-defence. The suggestion is
ludicrous. The UN charter provides for the use of force in situations of
self defence. There are broadly two circumstances in which such defensive
use of force is justified. The one is when the government of a state is
brutally suppressing its population, or some segment of it, and those
oppressed cannot secure their human rights by democratic means because those
means are denied them. Then they are justified in engaging in armed
rebellion. This is the situation of the Palestinians, for example. It is
clearly not the situation of the U.S. and British governments.

The second circumstance, which is the one that would be claimed to be
relevant here, arises when a state is under armed attack from another state.
In such circumstance it may defend itself through the use of force while
waiting for the Security Council to act. The states parties to the charter
had in mind situations in which, for example, a fleet of foreign ships and
submarines is offshore and is shelling targets in your country or firing
missiles at them, or foreign airplanes are bombing such targets, or foreign
ground troops have invaded your territory to carry out operations against
such targets. Thus the military forces of Afghanistan are justified in using
force to defend themselves against the armed attack by the forces of the
U.S.-British, which are acting in just this fashion.

But, the detractor will argue, is not the United States itself under armed
attack by the military forces of a state or terrorist forces "sponsored" by
a state? There are no naval ships or submarines off the coast of the United
States, no military aircraft flying over its territory dropping bombs on it,
no invasive foreign troops carrying out offensive operations against
military or other targets within its borders. But what then of the murderous
hijackings and the 6,000 Americans killed by them, and the threat perhaps of
more such acts?

Well, they are what they have been called, that is, acts of terrorism. They
are crimes, indeed crimes against humanity, named as such by UN High
Commissioner for Human Rights Mary Robinson. And there are procedures for
dealing with them, including international co-operation in bringing the
perpetrators to justice. They could be tried in a U.S. federal court.

But mounting a huge and overpowering international assault an
ocean-and-continent away from one's national territory against a bunch of
pirates and the government of the most devastated society on the planet led
by the most powerful state on the planet and calling it self-defence?
Please.

Such an assault is an act of aggression, a crime against peace. Without the
authority of the UN Security Council it is illegal The federal NDP has been
virtually the sole Canadian voice calling for the observance of
international law.

The call has been ignored or dismissed by the aggressor states, the Canadian
government, the other political parties and by the same state officials,
journalists, religious figures, experts and academic intellectuals who
cannot recognize elementary morality when it stares them in the face.

The CBC Radio 1 News yesterday announced that the first reported casualties
of the bombing are four United Nations aid workers engaged in defusing
landmines. On Oct. 5, the September Eleventh Peace Coalition was launched in
Ottawa. Its phone numbers are (604) 839-7543 and (613) 290-2695.

Peter Eglin is a sociology professor at Wilfrid Laurier University. Debbie
Chapman of Kitchener is studying for her master's degree in political
science at York University.
 
HA--- HA---- HA..... had a few funny things but i think religion should be left out of jokes... ALLAH has nothing to do with the Taliban, so why poke fun with that... Allah means God, why the hell is this being used in these type of jokes..... I HATE THE TALIBAN.... But remember, lets stay away from making fun of things that have to do with the religeon (including, veils, and Allah)... There were a few funny jokes.... But lets try not to sound like insensitive jack asses.... Afghanistan is going through a terrible time.... LET TALIBAN BURN IN HELL... But there are still innocent people in Afghanistan, and we should have respect for them... This was a creative thing, but i just find a few of these lines insensitive.
 
I thought this was a humor thread.

------------------
"I'm gonna start a day care!"-Bono
 
Originally posted by Dalton Brother:


First, the assault is immoral. It is described by its perpetrators as
"retaliation." The Gage Canadian Dictionary defines retaliation as "the
repaying a wrong, injury, etc. with another; return of like for like." It is
an elementary moral principle that to repay one wrong with another is itself
wrong; it is immoral. In games and sports, including professional sports
like soccer and hockey, we penalize acts of retaliation. They are against
the rules, they are wrong.


We are engaged in this conflict for the sole purpose of protecting the world from further acts of Terrorism.

Civilized societies have banned capital punishment, that is, the taking of a
life for a life by the state. This is not primarily because we have learned
that capital punishment does not deter, or because it is characteristically
carried out in a racially discriminatory way, or because there is no remedy
for mistakes, but because it is immoral. It is wrong to engage in
cold-blooded murder. Capital punishment is cold-blooded murder.


It will deter once the terrorists are put out of commission.

So it is with the bombing and shooting being carried out by the U.S.-U.K.
armed forces, following the orders of their military and political
commanders. These actions are designed to kill Taliban soldiers and bin
Laden followers and to destroy their military property. They are murderous.


Yes, these actions are designed to kill taliban soldiers and bin laden followers. Those are the same people who are harboring terrorist. Don't you realize that over 5000 people died. In the one square mile of my neighborhood, over 110 people died. Who, in their right mind, doesn't feel that further incidents/catastophies should be stopped.

Should we have stopped hitler? Or was killing hitler followers illegal or wrong?

Fuck, I can't go on and dissect this ridiculous arguement. Don't pass this gargabe off as scholarly work...its full of riddled wear.

Do not be forced fed idealistic bullshit just because your 3rd rate professor at your community college wrote this piece.

Idealism is a great. War is horrible. In an ideal world, war wouldn't be necessary. But we don't live in an ideal world. There is evil among us. You can't reason with evil.

I've had enough.

CK



[This message has been edited by TheU2 (edited 11-07-2001).]
 
Originally posted by Dalton Brother:
Ha, yeah, right.....the bombing will stop...is that the funny part of your joke.

Ummm... I didnt' write it but that wasn't meant to be a joke you ignorant fool. If you do not like the freedoms that the "west" provides you with then I suggest you go to the Middle East where you will be censored and oppressed. The war is against EVIL -- the EVIL that supports and harbors OSAMA BIN LADEN, the evil that does more harm to it's own citizens than any US bomb could ever do. That's what the war is about. And your stupid argument does not hold water, so please do some research and learn * a little * about something before spousing your ignorant viewpoints. Freedom of speech is great, ain't it. If the US is ultimately successful, the citizens of Afghanistan will someday enjoy it. We can only pray that they do. Have a nice day enjoying your freedom.
 
Hitman and TheU2

Yes....freedom of speech is great.

It's really impressive to see people argue with such vigour. Yet, I'm really curious as to why my views are attacked as being "ignorant" and "third rate"?

Suggesting that I need to "learn a little" is also a pretty surprising commment.

Although I utterly condemn the attack of September 11th, I simply feel that the current bombing crusade is wrong, rushed, and illegal - how does this constitute "ignorance"?

I have done my homework, and in accordance with International Law, "Enduring Freedom" is illegal and wrong.

If you insist that I'm missing the bigger picture in terms of security, further terrorist attacks, and championing freedom - let me ask you this:

Do you really feel that terrorism will end when the current military campaign eventually leads to the death of a few hundred thousand Afghan children, women and men due to starvation?

The war and the US demanded border crossings is denying them any food, the bombing of Kabul's power supply has shut down the city's water supply denying residents water and the bombing of the fuel depots is denying them any fuel. This is innocent biogical warefare precipitating a gigantic humanitarian catastrophe!

Just like you I condemn Osama bin Laden, and the terrorists of Sept.11th.

However the risks to US citizens are NOT substantially greater than the risks of the inevitable violent or slow death faced by the millions of Earth's citizens suffering from the relentless exercise of American military and economic power.

Dalton
 
Why can't humor threads just stay humor threads?

------------------
"I'm gonna start a day care!"-Bono
 
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