Why I'd Make A Good Husband V.1

[Pollux]

Why I'd Make A Good Husband
A Persuasive essay in point form by Pollux (real name ommited for non-obvious reasons)

- I can somewhat cook... compared to other guys. I mean, anyone can do Kraft Dinner, but as long as I have instructions I think I could pull of something a little more difficult.

- I am not an attractive person, but I'm not that ugly either. So even though you wouldn't WANT to sleep with me, it wouldn't scare you for life or anything. It's not like you'll wake up years down the road and think, "Oh my God, I can't eat a sausage anymore because I had sex with Pollux."(real name ommited for non-obvious reasons)

- I don't talk, but I listen. I swear, if you want to, I can listen for hours on end about any problem you have. Plus, I don't judge people. If you tell me about some stupid thing you did when you were 12 and haven't told anyone else, I won't look at you differently.

- I don't dress bad. I don't dress good etiher, but lets look at it like this: I own NO jogging pants, NO shirts with sports team's logo, there are holes in NONE of them, and I wear silk boxer shorts.

- I'm a slacker when it comes to school/work, so I can focus all my attention on YOU!

- I have low self-esteem so I'll always be making fun of myself, and not you. Some find that charming, the insecure self-pity thing.

- I DON'T snap bra straps.

- I'm not a big sports guy, so I have no problem turning off the hockey game and watching "You've Got Mail."

- I use a lot of big words out of context. So basically, if you don't think about what they mean, I come across educated.

- I can give a good massage. That's the only sensual thing I do well. I'm telling you, my hands are paintbrushes and you're the canvas, baby.

 

[rougerum]

**Nominates this for best thread of the year**

~rougerum

 

[sulawesigirl4]

*seconds the nomination*

so, you're telling us this paragon of masculinity exists and is single?

-sula (name omitted for obvious reasons)

 

[Salome]

wow,
if only I were gay
I would jump all over you

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Salome
Shake it, shake it, shake it

 

[zooropamanda]

TMI

 

[Innocent Eyes]

Pollux, you've obviously given this a lot of thought. But why do you want to convince us that you'd make a good husband?

 

[Pollux]

I have nothing better to do...

 

[Bonochick]

Originally posted by Pollux:

- I'm a slacker when it comes to school/work, so I can focus all my attention on YOU!

*lol* Way to turn a negative into a positive!

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"I Can Lose Myself, You I Can't Live Without"

 

[sulawesigirl4]

Originally posted by Pollux:
I have nothing better to do...

That line is garunteed to sweep a woman off her feet.

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~I want to play the guitar very badly, and I do play the guitar very badly - Bono~

Take a virtual tour of U2's Dublin... Crzy4Bono's U2 page with some of Sula's Dublin pic's

 

[Pollux]

Originally posted by sulawesigirl4:
That line is garunteed to sweep a woman off her feet.

Are you hitting on me?

 

[Like O2]

Originally posted by Pollux:
I can give a good massage. That's the only sensual thing I do well. I'm telling you, my hands are paintbrushes and you're the canvas, baby.

Do you rent out specific services? This is the only one I'm really interested in right now.

 

[Innocent Eyes]

Good one, Like O2!!!

 

[SicilianGoddess]

If you guys only knew who Pollux was......

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I Spiked Your Drink

Sicy's Website

 

[SkeeK]

What if it turned out the woman was a lesbian and only recently became bisexual?

 

[KhanadaRhodes]

i dunno, i thought it was kinda funny. dunno if it was meant to be interpreted as such...

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have a nice day!
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"are you serious? do you really care what peanut butter i prefer? are you in peanut butter marketing or something?"
khanada

 

[Angela Harlem]

I think we know SG.

Keep it up and all will be sweet. You know the rest.

 

[Like O2]

Originally posted by SicilianGoddess:
If you guys only knew who Pollux was......

Oh do tell Sicy.....

As long as it's not Gen-Tree or polar, it doesn't matter to me. I'll take a great massage from anyone....boy, girl, gay, straight, tall, short.......

 

[Angela Harlem]

They say art irritates, err I mean imitates life.

Just close your eyes and ignore the bad ppl LikeO2!

This place is too funny. Really, too funny.

 

[Like O2]

Am I the ONLY one who is missing something here??? Come on, someone let me in on the joke.

Sicy, you have my e-mail address....e-mail me and tell me what I'm not "getting".

I don't care if you guys ARE laughing ~ *pout, pout*

 

[zooropamanda]

hahahahahaha "as long as..."

 

[Angela Harlem]

Aww O2! Dont pout! Its really not that funny or important. I dont even know if SG and I are talking about the same thing that Manda and I are. (Or is that a different thread?) I dont even know if Im right here...Not to confuse ya further...I think I might just make hay while the sun shines and leave this one alone...

 

[Pollux]

*shakes fist at Christine

 

[SicilianGoddess]

Originally posted by Pollux:
*shakes fist at Christine

WHAT!?? I havent said a word!!!

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I Spiked Your Drink

Sicy's Website

 

[SicilianGoddess]

And Eileen, I dont have your email.. I cannot readily locate it. But I promised not to tell anyway... see I'm trustworthy!

Everyone seems to be on the same track though.

Dont trip Pollux, its all good! You're doing just fine!

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I Spiked Your Drink

Sicy's Website

 

[bonovista]

LMFAO!! I third the nomination as best thread of the year..If not since the beginning of time..

Pollux..That would sweep anyone off their feet!!

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****Formerly known as Miss Bonovista..Now known as Mrs.Emeraldscorpio.****

 

[SweetOnU2]

at this whole thread! Oh my! *giggles*

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~*Dream Out loud*~

(??.?(?*?.? ?.?*?)?.??)
?.???. *Monica* .???.?
(?.??(?.??* *??.?)??.)