Pollux
Babyface
Why I'd Make A Good Husband
A Persuasive essay in point form by Pollux (real name ommited for non-obvious reasons)
- I can somewhat cook... compared to other guys. I mean, anyone can do Kraft Dinner, but as long as I have instructions I think I could pull of something a little more difficult.
- I am not an attractive person, but I'm not that ugly either. So even though you wouldn't WANT to sleep with me, it wouldn't scare you for life or anything. It's not like you'll wake up years down the road and think, "Oh my God, I can't eat a sausage anymore because I had sex with Pollux."(real name ommited for non-obvious reasons)
- I don't talk, but I listen. I swear, if you want to, I can listen for hours on end about any problem you have. Plus, I don't judge people. If you tell me about some stupid thing you did when you were 12 and haven't told anyone else, I won't look at you differently.
- I don't dress bad. I don't dress good etiher, but lets look at it like this: I own NO jogging pants, NO shirts with sports team's logo, there are holes in NONE of them, and I wear silk boxer shorts.
- I'm a slacker when it comes to school/work, so I can focus all my attention on YOU!
- I have low self-esteem so I'll always be making fun of myself, and not you. Some find that charming, the insecure self-pity thing.
- I DON'T snap bra straps.
- I'm not a big sports guy, so I have no problem turning off the hockey game and watching "You've Got Mail."
- I use a lot of big words out of context. So basically, if you don't think about what they mean, I come across educated.
- I can give a good massage. That's the only sensual thing I do well. I'm telling you, my hands are paintbrushes and you're the canvas, baby.
A Persuasive essay in point form by Pollux (real name ommited for non-obvious reasons)
- I can somewhat cook... compared to other guys. I mean, anyone can do Kraft Dinner, but as long as I have instructions I think I could pull of something a little more difficult.
- I am not an attractive person, but I'm not that ugly either. So even though you wouldn't WANT to sleep with me, it wouldn't scare you for life or anything. It's not like you'll wake up years down the road and think, "Oh my God, I can't eat a sausage anymore because I had sex with Pollux."(real name ommited for non-obvious reasons)
- I don't talk, but I listen. I swear, if you want to, I can listen for hours on end about any problem you have. Plus, I don't judge people. If you tell me about some stupid thing you did when you were 12 and haven't told anyone else, I won't look at you differently.
- I don't dress bad. I don't dress good etiher, but lets look at it like this: I own NO jogging pants, NO shirts with sports team's logo, there are holes in NONE of them, and I wear silk boxer shorts.
- I'm a slacker when it comes to school/work, so I can focus all my attention on YOU!
- I have low self-esteem so I'll always be making fun of myself, and not you. Some find that charming, the insecure self-pity thing.
- I DON'T snap bra straps.
- I'm not a big sports guy, so I have no problem turning off the hockey game and watching "You've Got Mail."
- I use a lot of big words out of context. So basically, if you don't think about what they mean, I come across educated.
- I can give a good massage. That's the only sensual thing I do well. I'm telling you, my hands are paintbrushes and you're the canvas, baby.