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Old 05-20-2003, 08:53 AM   #1
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Why Athletes Can't Have Real Jobs

WHY ATHLETES CAN'T HAVE REAL JOBS:

New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the
upcoming season:
"I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever
comes first."

And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skins say:
"I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."

Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his
coach, John Jenkins:
"He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings."

Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann,
1996: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

Senior basketball player at the University of
Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."

Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach:
"You guys line up alphabetically by height." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."

Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up again
with promoter Don King:
"Why would anyone expect him to come out
smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton."

Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role
model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the kids to copulate me."

Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining
why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so
when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."

Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan
training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is."

Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player,
explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice:
"My sister's expecting
a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt." (I
wonder if his IQ ever hit room temperature in January)

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player:
"I told him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?'
He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"

Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M,
recounting what he told a
player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to
me like you're spending too much time on one subject."

Amarillo High School and Oiler coach Bum Phillips when
asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips,
Phillips responded:
"Because she is too damn ugly to kiss good-bye."
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Old 05-20-2003, 09:08 AM   #2
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Old 05-20-2003, 07:11 PM   #3
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Re: Why Athletes Can't Have Real Jobs

Quote:
Originally posted by LarryMullen's_POPAngel
A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein
I agree
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Old 05-22-2003, 04:01 AM   #4
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Re: Why Athletes Can't Have Real Jobs

Quote:
Originally posted by LarryMullen's_POPAngel
A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein
What an idiot... it's Epstein you buffoons.

Read a book.
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Old 05-22-2003, 04:03 AM   #5
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Is that the guy on "Welcome Back Kotter"?
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