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Old 05-29-2003, 04:56 PM   #16
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haha, ok email it
yep i come from the home of massive attack - and how that makes me proud! Its the only thing Bristol is famous for though
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Old 05-29-2003, 04:57 PM   #17
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cav1n@hotmail.com by the way
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Old 05-29-2003, 08:24 PM   #18
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A man walks into a bar.

Ouch.
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Old 05-30-2003, 02:45 AM   #19
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Q)What did the chorus say when Oedepous gouged out his eyes?
A) That's a face only a mother could love.
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Old 05-30-2003, 09:41 AM   #20
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I prefer snaps, such as:

Your mama's so stupid they had to burn down the school to get her out of the third grade.

Your sister's so ugly she has to play "easy to get."

Your mama's so fat they had to baptize her at SeaWorld.

Your grandmama's so old she can read the Bible and reminisce.

I could go on and on...
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Old 05-30-2003, 01:50 PM   #21
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from a friend of mine who was raised Mennonite:

Q: Why do Mennonites never make love standing up?
A: It might lead to dancing.
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Old 05-31-2003, 04:52 AM   #22
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love, blood, life
 
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mum, why do i keep going round in circles?
shut up or i'll nail your other foot to the floor.
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Old 05-31-2003, 05:26 AM   #23
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Two guys walk into a bar...



You'd think that at least ONE of them would have ducked!
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Old 05-31-2003, 06:11 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally posted by HeartlandGirl
Your mama's so stupid they had to burn down the school to get her out of the third grade.

Your sister's so ugly she has to play "easy get"
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Old 05-31-2003, 06:44 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally posted by joyfulgirl
Q: Why do Mennonites never make love standing up?
A: It might lead to dancing.

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Old 05-31-2003, 08:53 PM   #26
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A pirate walkes into a bar with a steering wheel coming out of his fly. As he walks up to the bar the bartender says, "Hey pal, you know you've got a steering wheel coming out of your fly?"

And the pirate says "Aaarrrr, it's driving me nuts!"
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Old 05-31-2003, 10:15 PM   #27
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A long time ago, in a small village, there was a young man who had been born with no arms. The village church took pity on him and gave him a job as the bell-ringer. Since he had no arms to work the ropes, he would take a running head start and slam himself into the bell.

One day, the man was feeling a little dizzy, and as he ran towards the bell, he completely missed and fell out of the bell tower to his death. Two men witnessed the fall and ran over to see if they could save him. One of them had a hard time recognizing the young man on the ground, so he asked his friend if he knew who it was.

"I'm not sure," said his friend, "but his face rings a bell."




















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Old 05-31-2003, 10:50 PM   #28
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Old 05-31-2003, 11:51 PM   #29
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*Not a joke really*

The U.N. conducted a worldwide survey last month. The only
question asked was: "Would you please give your honest
opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of
the world?"

The survey was a HUGE failure.

In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.
In Eastern Europe they didn't now what "honest" meant.
In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.
In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.
In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.
In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.
And in the U.S.A. they didn't know what "the rest of the
world" meant.
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Old 06-01-2003, 06:40 AM   #30
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so, it was up to the aussies then?
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