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View Poll Results: Should I give my colleague my fish?
Yes, she really wants it so give it to her. 1 6.25%
No, it was a gift to you, you should keep it. 15 93.75%
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Old 03-29-2003, 11:21 PM   #1
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What should I do? (work politics)

Many years ago, a co-worker and friend gave me this lovely glass fish ornament for my desk. She has since moved to the other side of the country and I never see her anymore. I have taken this fish to every job that I have worked since then, it brightens up my desk.

I am about to change jobs, I only have one week left. A co-worker at my current job has made it abundantly clear that she LOVES this fish and she wants it and even asked if she could have it!

Well, if she loves it that much, maybe I should give it to her as a parting gift. On the other hand, I think it's a bit rude of her to ask...and to hint at it so often. Also, it was a gift and my only keepsake from another friend. Then again, she might think I'm rude and inconsiderate not to give it to her when she so obviously wants it, and I like it, but don't love it as much as she does.

See the conundrum I am in?

What would you do?
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Old 03-29-2003, 11:34 PM   #2
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I would just politely tell her it was a gift from someone and you don't feel right re-giving it. Maybe you could find something similar to give her?
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Old 03-29-2003, 11:39 PM   #3
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Well, I was actually thinking of buying her her own fish, but then she came into my office the other day and said she found a store with the fish and that they are very expensive!

I will think about it some more....maybe I will just get her a different gift....and maybe I can survive without the fish....
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Old 03-29-2003, 11:51 PM   #4
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The same kind of thing is happening to me at work right now. I got this fancy pen from a co-worker who has since left our work to move away. Eventhough I see her once in a while, the pen is pretty much it to remind me of her. Anyway, this old guy who comes into the store has this fetish for pens......and I made the mistake of using my pen infront of him. Now he wants to buy my pen from me....I told him it was a gift, but he doesn't care. I lied to the old guy and said that I would sell it to him when it goes dead (i can re-fill it) just to get him off my back. I have no intention of selling my pen to him......ever.

Sort of the same thing, but sort of not......just wanted to put my 2 cents in.

BTW, keep the fish.....it was a gift to you.....keep it forever.
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Old 03-29-2003, 11:55 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by meegannie
I would just politely tell her it was a gift from someone and you don't feel right re-giving it.
Right. It was a gift and has emotional value for you, so I don't see why you should give it to her.
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Old 03-29-2003, 11:56 PM   #6
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keep the fish
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Old 03-30-2003, 12:02 AM   #7
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How rude of her. Maybe you could say something like, "This was a gift from a very special friend. If someone gave you something, would you just give it away?"
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Old 03-30-2003, 12:21 AM   #8
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keep the fish Jess...it was rude of her to ask and you shouldn't buy her another one.

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Old 03-30-2003, 01:14 AM   #9
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Keep it. If she's pressuring you like this, she does this all the time. It's probably how she gets stuff from people.

If you do decide to give it to her, throw it at the back of her head.
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Old 03-30-2003, 01:37 AM   #10
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i agree with what everyone else said...she was being rude
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Old 03-30-2003, 02:59 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by martha
Keep it. If she's pressuring you like this, she does this all the time. It's probably how she gets stuff from people.

If you do decide to give it to her, throw it at the back of her head.


Keep the fish...let her get her own fish.
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Old 03-30-2003, 03:02 AM   #12
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Keep the fish! I think it's *really* rude of her to ask for it outright.

Also, how much do you even like this co-worker? If they were a near and dear friend, it's one thing and I might excuse the asking, but it sounds like you are just friendly co-workers.
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Old 03-30-2003, 03:14 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mrs. Edge
it was a gift and my only keepsake from another friend
that's the thing that makes me say no. my question to you is, how close are you to this co-worker? since you're leaving, if you're not too close, what is she gonna do? besides, while some give gifts to those leaving a job, i've never heard of people leaving a job giving gifts to their soon-to-be former co-workers! what a cheapskate! if she wants a fish, she can buy her own. since they're expensive, it's really all the more reason for you to keep it. your friend spent a lot of money on it and without it you'd not have anything really to remind you of your friend.

plus, her constant pestering for you to give it to her is rude. i mean, beyond rude. if someone wants something, you make a hint at it once, and leave it at that. if it's someone forgetful like a guy, you want to occasionally drop a hint now and then, but it sounds like every time she comes in your office she's like, "so, can i have the fish?" such poor etiquette.

you should tell her on your last day that you were planning on giving it to her when she first asked. but now that she's asked you in upwards of a million times, it made you determined to NOT give it to her!
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Old 03-30-2003, 03:38 AM   #14
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if you don't give it to her

it will bring you bad energy
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Old 03-30-2003, 09:34 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally posted by deep
if you don't give it to her

it will bring you bad energy
It wont. Fiddlesticks.

Keep the fish. It brings you good energy.
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