The Ouagadougou Superthread

[Gluey]

*knocks on your door*

Hi gluey, I'd like to talk to you about Jeebus.

 

[coolian2]

Save me jebus!

 

[major_panic]

This ... "work", it does not involve the Internet?

What a peculiar reality you live in.

I know. The Matrix has me.

And dude, I'm the one who's supposed to go door-knocking around here!

... actually I've been wishing for some Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses to come around, so I can get into a proper theological stoush...

 

[Axver]

random bastards are too scared to knock at my door ,

pagan symbols painted on the fence FTW .

But are you interested in Jeebus? You urgently need to know all about how he doesn't exist and didn't do any miracles and told us absolutely nothing useful.

 

[Cin]

*knocks on your door*

Hi gluey, I'd like to talk to you about Jeebus.

i say jeebus too. No-one knocks on my door anymore, telling them to fuck off every time seems to have done the trick

 

[Gluey]

Save me jebus!

I'm gladly beyond saving. I once eclaimed excitedly when offered reading material "Great! I was just looking for something to light the fire with!".....

 

[mysterious_jen]

i say jeebus too. No-one knocks on my door anymore, telling them to fuck off every time seems to have done the trick

yeah babe ! thats the corio way

 

[major_panic]

But are you interested in Jeebus? You urgently need to know all about how he doesn't exist and didn't do any miracles and told us absolutely nothing useful.

Come on, don't you like paradoxical statements?

 

[coolian2]

Nobody bothers coming all the way up the right of way to my place

Plus always pretending i'm not home or being a bastard always means people won't come back.

But it's mainly the driveway. I often need to take a packed lunch.

 

[Axver]

I know. The Matrix has me.

And dude, I'm the one who's supposed to go door-knocking around here!

... actually I've been wishing for some Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses to come around, so I can get into a proper theological stoush...

I'm really pissed off that the only time a Jehovah's Witness knocked on my door, I was in my boxers and feeling sick. I would've loved to have pwnd them with theology.

And don't worry, I'm just doing door-knocking for the fundie Jeebus, not your Jesus. Actually, that'd be really funny to do one day, door-knocking for a non-existent bullshit religion.

 

[Cin]

I'm gladly beyond saving. I once eclaimed excitedly when offered reading material "Great! I was just looking for something to light the fire with!".....

oh man, I'm feeling all whoreish but have to go out Stupid people in stupid hospitals, geez, you think they'd be a bit more considerate of my craic habit.

 

[coolian2]

I'm gladly beyond saving. I once eclaimed excitedly when offered reading material "Great! I was just looking for something to light the fire with!".....

"Sweet, i needed more reading material for the toile...aw, it's not porn"

 

[mysterious_jen]

oh man, I'm feeling all whoreish but have to go out Stupid people in stupid hospitals, geez, you think they'd be a bit more considerate of my craic habit.

come over and see my new boots when you are done , then you will know whorish

 

[coolian2]

I'm really pissed off that the only time a Jehovah's Witness knocked on my door, I was in my boxers and feeling sick. I would've loved to have pwnd them with theology.

And don't worry, I'm just doing door-knocking for the fundie Jeebus, not your Jesus. Actually, that'd be really funny to do one day, door-knocking for a non-existent bullshit religion.

Liechtensteinism.

 

[Cin]

I'm really pissed off that the only time a Jehovah's Witness knocked on my door, I was in my boxers and feeling sick. I would've loved to have pwnd them with theology.

And don't worry, I'm just doing door-knocking for the fundie Jeebus, not your Jesus. Actually, that'd be really funny to do one day, door-knocking for a non-existent bullshit religion.

are you the guy that keeps coming to my door trying to get me to change electricity companies??

 

[Axver]

Liechtensteinism.

Announced by the prophet Kunstmuseum.

 

[LemonMelon]

I don't care what he actually does. He's fast food guy. He vehemently proclaims himself to work at McDonald's, but we all know he's not good enough. He didn't even go to college.

SCENE 4
Time: CLOSING TIME

Fast Food Cop: [speed-reading through the owners manual for the deep fryer] Hmm...I had no idea this was made in Montreal. And since when was I supposed to fry the potatoes? Something sounds off there.

[clock strikes 3 PM]

Fast Food Cop: Well, that was an epic day of work. Now, time to clean up. [sees a customer's wallet, then sees lost and found bin, and throws them both in the garbage] OK, I'm out of this shithole. [sees receipt] Hey, what's this...[stares at it in an intense manner for 15 seconds, trying not to blink]

COMMERCIAL BREAK - 4 minutes

 

[mysterious_jen]

I'm really pissed off that the only time a Jehovah's Witness knocked on my door, I was in my boxers and feeling sick. I would've loved to have pwnd them with theology.

And don't worry, I'm just doing door-knocking for the fundie Jeebus, not your Jesus. Actually, that'd be really funny to do one day, door-knocking for a non-existent bullshit religion.

a while back i was in the middle of something ... ok we will call it fucking and this dude knocks on the door wanting to tell me about loving my neighbour .


THATS WHAT I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF !

 

[major_panic]

I'm really pissed off that the only time a Jehovah's Witness knocked on my door, I was in my boxers and feeling sick. I would've loved to have pwnd them with theology.

And don't worry, I'm just doing door-knocking for the fundie Jeebus, not your Jesus. Actually, that'd be really funny to do one day, door-knocking for a non-existent bullshit religion.

"Hello, I represent the Pastafarians of Australia. Has anyone told you about the Flying Spaghetti Monster?"

 

[Axver]

are you the guy that keeps coming to my door trying to get me to change electricity companies??

No, that's Ali, cross-dressing.

She still hasn't given me free electricity.

 

[Axver]

"Hello, I represent the Pastafarians of Australia. Has anyone told you about the Flying Spaghetti Monster?"

The Invisible Pink Unicorn isn't going to be too happy about that one!

 

[Lila64]

\driveby

 

[major_panic]

Announced by the prophet Kunstmuseum.

I like this idea actually. Or, how about... Africanism? As announced by the prophet Bono.

All you have to do is have heart, soul, and know how to kneel and say the word "Africa".

 

[mysterious_jen]

No, that's Ali, cross-dressing.

She still hasn't given me free electricity.

you have to give her something other than muffins in return ax.



virginity for free electricity

sounds like WIN to me !

 

[coolian2]

"Hello, i represent the Fred Nile Party. We've decided to support homosexuality and will being holding a little soiree next Friday. We'll be calling it the Fred Nile PARTAY!"

 

[major_panic]

The Invisible Pink Unicorn isn't going to be too happy about that one!

Uh, my high school emblem was a unicorn, that gonna cut it?

 

[Axver]

a while back i was in the middle of something ... ok we will call it fucking and this dude knocks on the door wanting to tell me about loving my neighbour .


THATS WHAT I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF !

I do hope you said that to him.

 

[coolian2]

I like this idea actually. Or, how about... Africanism? As announced by the prophet Bono.

All you have to do is have heart, soul, and know how to kneel and say the word "Africa".

And every now and then get Africa rammed down your throat

 

[mysterious_jen]

"Hello, i represent the Fred Nile Party. We've decided to support homosexuality and will being holding a little soiree next Friday. We'll be calling it the Fred Nile PARTAY!"

fred nile .



BURN MUTHAFUCKER.

 

[Axver]

you have to give her something other than muffins in return ax.



virginity for free electricity

sounds like WIN to me !

You're trying to tell me muffins AND chocolate biscuits aren't good enough?