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Old 12-10-2001, 04:35 AM   #1
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The 'Hello Australia' Awards

We have so much style...

Why would you want to be anything else but Australian?!?!
From the Australian Bureau of Statistics:

3 Australians die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their
tongue.

142 Australians were injured in 1998 by not removing all the pins from
new shirts.

58 Australians are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
screwdrivers.

31 Australians have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree
while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Australians have died in the last 3 years by eating Christmas
decorations they believed were chocolate.

Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling
incidents.

101 Australians since 1997 have had to have broken parts of plastic
toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.

18 Australians had serious burns in 1998 trying on a new jumper with a
lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Australians were admitted to casualty in the last two
years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth or eye socket.

5 Australians were injured last year in accidents involving out of
control Scalextric cars.

?.........and finally:

8 Australians cracked their skull in 1997 after falling asleep
(passing out) while throwing up into the toilet.

YEP! It's great to be Australian!
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Old 12-10-2001, 08:13 AM   #2
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eye socket???

holy shite!

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Old 12-10-2001, 08:51 AM   #3
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i must be aussie, i can almost picture how the eyesocket thing works
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Old 12-10-2001, 09:13 AM   #4
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Hello Australia!!

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"we're free to fly the crimsom sky...the sun won't melt our wings tonight..."
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Old 12-10-2001, 09:15 AM   #5
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Damn, Aussies are cool!

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But you don't know the half of it..."
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Old 12-10-2001, 10:41 AM   #6
 
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Quote:
Australians were injured last year in accidents involving out of
control Scalextric cars
wow, I just posted about this in another thread...I thought I was the only one who'd fallen victim, they are lethal
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Old 12-10-2001, 04:56 PM   #7
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all of those anecdotes were so funny, and I must admit that I have been witness to a few of them at various parties and backyard barbies, it is as if some people belive that they can take on the world when it is hot and they are intoxicated
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Old 12-10-2001, 05:05 PM   #8
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well, you are all in my prayers

you need it

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Old 12-10-2001, 07:49 PM   #9
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Is it, or is it not obvious that your country was founded by British convicts?

Homer: Oh. We left at 1:30pm Monday. What time is it now?
Lisa: It's 6:45am next Wednesday. You may also be interested to know that it's summer here, not winter.
Homer: Ohhh! [throws his sled away]


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Old 12-11-2001, 01:12 AM   #10
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bwahahaha

ok that was the funniest thing Ive read in ages angie

but really whos gonna walk all the way down to the garage to get a screw driver anyway?

*waits to be a statistic for putting water in the iron without turning it off*
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Old 12-11-2001, 02:38 AM   #11
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Yes Foxxy, we are very *cough* proud *cough* of our ah, heritage!

Um manda, I just realised...I never turn the iron off before refilling. And I mean never. I really have never thought of it. I cant belive I'm admitting it here either. Add me to the list of those worthy of a Hello Australia.

Thanks, you potentially saved my life!

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Old 12-11-2001, 03:11 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Angela Harlem:
[B3 Australians die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their
tongue.
[/B]
ROFLMAO!!!!!

That's so funny...I'd like to see the stat for the US, probably a LOT more! LOL

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Don't let the bastards grind you down!

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Old 12-11-2001, 03:52 AM   #13
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yes, that's my australia.

I wonder how many of those christmas trees watered were plastic ones.
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