Indeed it is a dire hour. The support of the Interference constituents may be our only reprieve from server degradation. Some of you posters out there have not conformed to the post and thread size limits I enforced earlier, but now's your chance to ensure a front row seat at interference's pearly gates! Absolution my friends, is only a paypal transfer away...
On the uninformed behalf of site management, I have come to encourage and rally for your financial support. After all, devotion is a measured currency, defined in dollars and not in sense!!! Now how you say, will I accomplish the divine task outlined by the directive mandate? Will I use my masculine wyles in a summer carwash aimed at fundraising? Will I pose for the 2005 Interference Wholesome Manwhore calendar? Will I sell Interference merchandise door-to-door, including mugs, chocolates, pewter busts of Elvis, and public shares of stock? Will I pander to your good nature by posting in several forums regarding the plight of our fair site? No, no. I will do none of those things, because I respect your continuing membership to the site.
In order to win your hearts and your minds (U2 pun! Haha!) I will present to you an honest fiscal breakdown of how your money is going to be used... wisely:
- $250 new server upgrade to appease the increase in forum use
- $500 to finally pay the moderators something for babysitting me
- $1650 to purchase a new Interference MoPed for site admins... so that they can... umm... attend to your needs faster!!!
- $3000 to buy a new background paint colour... for Interference blue touch-ups. It's a growing concern. Let's address it now!
That doesn't seem to add up to $2500 now does it? Oh well, organization in action plans isn't a necessity, it's more of an after thought. You need not worry at all because your funds will be responsibly logged and extravagantly spent... in the interest of the site for surely! Nothing but the best and most genuine of intentions for our most valued of members.
Considering all of the above infotainment, I think yours is an easy decision to make. Send your money now. In fact, send all you have! With this new source of capital we'll be an unstoppable internet force... and of course, we'll occasionally report on U2.
Stay the course everyone. Keep your posts short and your wallets open!
I bid you all safety and a happy life,
Goodnight.
On the uninformed behalf of site management, I have come to encourage and rally for your financial support. After all, devotion is a measured currency, defined in dollars and not in sense!!! Now how you say, will I accomplish the divine task outlined by the directive mandate? Will I use my masculine wyles in a summer carwash aimed at fundraising? Will I pose for the 2005 Interference Wholesome Manwhore calendar? Will I sell Interference merchandise door-to-door, including mugs, chocolates, pewter busts of Elvis, and public shares of stock? Will I pander to your good nature by posting in several forums regarding the plight of our fair site? No, no. I will do none of those things, because I respect your continuing membership to the site.
In order to win your hearts and your minds (U2 pun! Haha!) I will present to you an honest fiscal breakdown of how your money is going to be used... wisely:
- $250 new server upgrade to appease the increase in forum use
- $500 to finally pay the moderators something for babysitting me
- $1650 to purchase a new Interference MoPed for site admins... so that they can... umm... attend to your needs faster!!!
- $3000 to buy a new background paint colour... for Interference blue touch-ups. It's a growing concern. Let's address it now!
That doesn't seem to add up to $2500 now does it? Oh well, organization in action plans isn't a necessity, it's more of an after thought. You need not worry at all because your funds will be responsibly logged and extravagantly spent... in the interest of the site for surely! Nothing but the best and most genuine of intentions for our most valued of members.
Considering all of the above infotainment, I think yours is an easy decision to make. Send your money now. In fact, send all you have! With this new source of capital we'll be an unstoppable internet force... and of course, we'll occasionally report on U2.
Stay the course everyone. Keep your posts short and your wallets open!
I bid you all safety and a happy life,
Goodnight.
