LMP
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I watched Waiting for Guffman, Best in Show, and A Mighty Wind back-to-back-to-back last weekend, and they're all pure genius.
Corky St. Clair from Guffman is my AV
I'm just going to quote a bunch from the movies, please join in on this collective droolfest of awesome.
Waiting for Guffman
Corky St. Clair: I was shopping for my wife Bonnie. I buy most of her clothes and Mrs Pearl was in the same shop! And it just was an accident you know, we started talking... about panty hose, she was saying... whatever that's not the point of the story but what the point is is that through this accidental meeting... it's like a Hitchcock movie you know where you're thrown into a rubber bag and put in the trunk of a car, you find people. You find them. Something, is is it karma? Maybe. But we found him, that's the important thing. And I got Bonnie a wonderful pantsuit.
Corky St. Clair: I'll tell you why I can't put up with you people. Because you're bastard people.
Corky St. Clair: It's a Zen thing, like how many babies fit in a tire.
Mrs. Pearl: We don't associate with the creative types. We have a Scrabble club. We associate with people with babies.
Corky St. Clair: Well, then, I just HATE you... and I hate your... ass... FACE!
Corky St. Clair: I got off that boat with nothing but my dancers belt and a tube of CHAPSTICK!
Ron Albertson: I had to have penis reduction surgery.
Dr. Allan Pearl: Penis *reduction*?
Sheila: I said to him, "Ron, you've gotta do something!" And he says to me, "Well, why don't you get one of those vagina enlargements?"
Best in Show
Max Berman: I'll gouge your right eye out with my thumb, I shit you not, you little freak! Now, will you get down here? I'm gonna punch you in the eye till it turns to jelly! I'll stab you with forks till you bleed, how bout that?
Hamilton Swan: Don't look at the fat ass losers or freaks, look at me!
Buck Laughlin: And to think that in some countries these dogs are eaten.
Gerry Fleck: I can't dance, I can't dance, I've got two left feet!
Cookie Fleck: I thought he was kidding.
Gerry Fleck: But I wasn't. I was born with two left feet.
Buck Laughlin: I went to one of those obedience places once... it was all going well until they spilled hot candle wax on my private parts.
Christy Cummings: We started this magazine, 'American Bitch'. It's a focus on the issues of the lesbian pure bred dog owner.
Meg Swan: This? This is a fish. This is a fish! You know what? Just shut up.
A Mighty Wind
Terry Bohner: There was abuse in my family, but it was mostly musical in nature.
David Kantor: In 1971, after the breakup of the Main Street Singers, Chuck Wiseman moved up to San Francisco where she started a retail business with his brothers Howard and Dell, the Three Wisemen's Sex Emporium. It was very successful for a year until they were sued over something having to do with a box of ben wah balls.
Amber Cole: Thank God for the model trains, you know? If they didn't have the model trains they wouldn't have gotten the idea for the big trains.
Jonathan Steinbloom: [referring to his mother] You could say she was overly protective - I just like to think she cared about me, which she did, a lot. And I was a member of the chess team and whenever we would have chess tournaments I had to wear a protective helmet, I had to wear a football helmet. Now who knows what she was thinking? Maybe she thought that we might have fallen maybe and impaled our heads on a pointy bishop or something, I don't know.
Alan Barrows: And they had no hole in the center of the record.
Mark Shubb: It would teeter crazily on the little spindle.
Jerry Palter: No, you had to provide it yourself. They were still good records. Good product.
Mark Shubb: If you punched a hole in them, you'd have a good time.
Laurie Bohner: Terry and I worship an unconventional deity. The power of another dimension. Now you are not going to read about this dimension in a book or a magazine because it exists nowhere... but in my own mind. Through our ceremonies and rituals we have witnessed the awesome and vibratory power... of color.
Corky St. Clair from Guffman is my AV
I'm just going to quote a bunch from the movies, please join in on this collective droolfest of awesome.
Waiting for Guffman
Corky St. Clair: I was shopping for my wife Bonnie. I buy most of her clothes and Mrs Pearl was in the same shop! And it just was an accident you know, we started talking... about panty hose, she was saying... whatever that's not the point of the story but what the point is is that through this accidental meeting... it's like a Hitchcock movie you know where you're thrown into a rubber bag and put in the trunk of a car, you find people. You find them. Something, is is it karma? Maybe. But we found him, that's the important thing. And I got Bonnie a wonderful pantsuit.
Corky St. Clair: I'll tell you why I can't put up with you people. Because you're bastard people.
Corky St. Clair: It's a Zen thing, like how many babies fit in a tire.
Mrs. Pearl: We don't associate with the creative types. We have a Scrabble club. We associate with people with babies.
Corky St. Clair: Well, then, I just HATE you... and I hate your... ass... FACE!
Corky St. Clair: I got off that boat with nothing but my dancers belt and a tube of CHAPSTICK!
Ron Albertson: I had to have penis reduction surgery.
Dr. Allan Pearl: Penis *reduction*?
Sheila: I said to him, "Ron, you've gotta do something!" And he says to me, "Well, why don't you get one of those vagina enlargements?"
Best in Show
Max Berman: I'll gouge your right eye out with my thumb, I shit you not, you little freak! Now, will you get down here? I'm gonna punch you in the eye till it turns to jelly! I'll stab you with forks till you bleed, how bout that?
Hamilton Swan: Don't look at the fat ass losers or freaks, look at me!
Buck Laughlin: And to think that in some countries these dogs are eaten.
Gerry Fleck: I can't dance, I can't dance, I've got two left feet!
Cookie Fleck: I thought he was kidding.
Gerry Fleck: But I wasn't. I was born with two left feet.
Buck Laughlin: I went to one of those obedience places once... it was all going well until they spilled hot candle wax on my private parts.
Christy Cummings: We started this magazine, 'American Bitch'. It's a focus on the issues of the lesbian pure bred dog owner.
Meg Swan: This? This is a fish. This is a fish! You know what? Just shut up.
A Mighty Wind
Terry Bohner: There was abuse in my family, but it was mostly musical in nature.
David Kantor: In 1971, after the breakup of the Main Street Singers, Chuck Wiseman moved up to San Francisco where she started a retail business with his brothers Howard and Dell, the Three Wisemen's Sex Emporium. It was very successful for a year until they were sued over something having to do with a box of ben wah balls.
Amber Cole: Thank God for the model trains, you know? If they didn't have the model trains they wouldn't have gotten the idea for the big trains.
Jonathan Steinbloom: [referring to his mother] You could say she was overly protective - I just like to think she cared about me, which she did, a lot. And I was a member of the chess team and whenever we would have chess tournaments I had to wear a protective helmet, I had to wear a football helmet. Now who knows what she was thinking? Maybe she thought that we might have fallen maybe and impaled our heads on a pointy bishop or something, I don't know.
Alan Barrows: And they had no hole in the center of the record.
Mark Shubb: It would teeter crazily on the little spindle.
Jerry Palter: No, you had to provide it yourself. They were still good records. Good product.
Mark Shubb: If you punched a hole in them, you'd have a good time.
Laurie Bohner: Terry and I worship an unconventional deity. The power of another dimension. Now you are not going to read about this dimension in a book or a magazine because it exists nowhere... but in my own mind. Through our ceremonies and rituals we have witnessed the awesome and vibratory power... of color.
I'll have to get busy at the video store. 
