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Old 03-26-2008, 12:11 AM   #421
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If that happened.. he could easily steal a Simpsons quote anyway

"I bent my wookie"

My 2nd favorite Simpsons quote ever!
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:11 AM   #422
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Wonder if he waxed first
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:16 AM   #423
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How did they not find him beforehand? Was he hiding in a pile of tennis balls?
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:21 AM   #424
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Well, he was probably innocently spectating while clothed... and then just ripped his clothes off and ran out there. That's how streakers usually do it, I think.


Not that I'd know personally
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:22 AM   #425
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wonder if it was his balls that went at 95mph??
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:22 AM   #426
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Gluey.

But that sounds scary I wouldn't want anybody's balls coming at me that fast.
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:24 AM   #427
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Gluey.

But that sounds scary I wouldn't want anybody's balls coming at me that fast.
Hell no! And you'd need a ball boy to collect them from where they crossed the line!
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:26 AM   #428
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We don't have that problem at hockey games... no one ever streaks at hockey games.

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DOL said: I wouldn't want anybody's balls coming at me that fast.
I think the only one you'd have to worry about that had that type of.. speed would be the energizer bunny.
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:26 AM   #429
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Can you imagine some poor guy applying for the position of 'ball boy' thinking it would be completely innocent

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We don't have that problem at hockey games... no one ever streaks at hockey games.
Nobody wants to slip on the ice naked

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I think the only one you'd have to worry about that had that type of.. speed would be the energizer bunny.
Furry pink balls!
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:31 AM   #430
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Plus it would be more of a challenge to streak at a hockey game. You'd have to get naked, then climb over the glass, fall on the ice, hope you didn't injure yourself after the fall.. running around slipping like crazy.

It would be a feat for sure, if anyone dared to try

And then of course, there's the shrinkage issue.
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:32 AM   #431
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Nobody wants to slip on the ice naked
Imagine ice burn on your frank n beans or boobs!!

OR, imagine if your balls were a bit damp and STUCK to the ice while you kept sliding.....you'd have to hope they could stretch a little!!
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:34 AM   #432
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And then of course, there's the shrinkage issue.

It's just not the same if it's crawled back up into itself, turning the dude into an impromptu girl.
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:35 AM   #433
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Hilarity would most likely ensue.

And it would more than likely make the highlight reel
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:37 AM   #434
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Hilarity would most likely ensue.

And it would more than likely make the highlight reel
You couldn't call that sort of shrinkage a 'highlight' now could you??!!
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:37 AM   #435
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God, can you imagine.

A guy is psyching himself up to streak at a hockey game. He's sweating a little. Finally he works up the nerve to do it. Quickly throwing off his nice warm clothes, he clambers over the glass barrier, losing his grip at the top and falling forward onto the ice. He faceplants on the ice, but not only that, he lands flat on his junk. The embarrassment is almost worse than the pain. But no, it's not over yet. His balls have frozen to the ice. Grimacing in pain, and growing more shamed by the minute, he wrenches himself free and manages to get to his feet, but slips immediately, this time landing on his back and cracking his skull against the ice, giving himself a bad concussion on top of everything else.

Yup. I think everyone that's even remotely considered streaking at a hockey game saw the entire scenario in his head, and immediately decided not to do it.


EDIT: I forgot to even mention shrinkage!
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