Subject: 30 Things you'd love to say at work - U2 Feedback

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Old 05-27-2005, 12:41 PM   #1
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Subject: 30 Things you'd love to say at work

Try a few of these:

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of **it.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. (My fave)

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
public. This is good!

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

10. Ahhh ... I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.

11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

16. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

17. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

18. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

19. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of karma to burn off.

20. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

21. Do I look like a people person?

22. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

23. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.

24. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

25. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

26. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

27. Can I trade this job for what's behind door number one?

28. Too many freaks,! not enough circuses.

29. Chaos, panic and disorder -- my work here is done.

30. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
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Old 05-27-2005, 01:05 PM   #2
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I like number 4, it rings particularly true at my job because i work retail.
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Old 05-27-2005, 01:13 PM   #3
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I used to do this to the kids when they were small and it drove them freakin' nuts...you look at 'em directly in the eye and say...

"I'm thinking the same thing about you!"
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Old 05-27-2005, 01:52 PM   #4
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22 works for me if you change office to school (especially first period )

School is Hell with fluorescent lighting- Yup That is completely true
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Old 05-27-2005, 06:31 PM   #5
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Re: Subject: 30 Things you'd love to say at work

Quote:
Originally posted by Eliv8
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
I'm tempted to make a nice big poster out of this and post it by my desk. Man, I could use that one every day!
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Old 05-27-2005, 09:12 PM   #6
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Old 05-27-2005, 09:55 PM   #7
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Awesome
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Old 05-27-2005, 10:04 PM   #8
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Re: Subject: 30 Things you'd love to say at work

Quote:
Originally posted by Eliv8
Try a few of these:
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

19. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of karma to burn off.

20. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

30. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
More things teachers can only wish they could say. I'm with Diemen though. I'd like to make a poster out of #'s 5 and 6 and hang them in my room. Something tells me the Board wouldn't like it though.....(damn them)
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Old 05-28-2005, 04:03 AM   #9
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Re: Subject: 30 Things you'd love to say at work

Quote:
Originally posted by Eliv8

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of **it.
Yes, this #1 is classic for anyone other than the boss ...

My favorite for the boss is ..." The boss is like a diaper ... ALWAYS on your ass and always FULL OF SH ... IT " ...
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Old 05-28-2005, 01:22 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mr. BAW
I used to do this to the kids when they were small and it drove them freakin' nuts...you look at 'em directly in the eye and say...

"I'm thinking the same thing about you!"
Gosh I hated when he did that!!!!!!!!
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Old 05-28-2005, 02:26 PM   #11
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Old 07-01-2005, 06:49 AM   #12
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#2 is the greatest - do you mind if I borrow it today?
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Old 07-01-2005, 07:30 AM   #13
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All of those, except the profanity, would work well in a classroom and when my neice comes to visit
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Old 07-01-2005, 07:39 AM   #14
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Why isn't "Go fuck yourself" on that list?
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Old 07-01-2005, 10:04 AM   #15
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<---works retail too.

Customer asks, "I need blah blah."

I'd love to say, what you need is manners.

Heheh on the day I decide to resign, think I'll say it. (Can't fire me then!)
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