Stupid Celebrity Quotes

[BonoFox1]

Be nice to your children, for they will choose your rest home.
- - -Phyllis Diller ...............


Drugs have nothing to do with the creation of music. In fact, drugs are dumb and self-indulgent. Kind of like sucking your thumb.
- - -Courtney Love

 

[BonoFox1]

If it doesn't fit, you must acquit.
- - -Johnnie L. Cochran, Jr.


If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
- - -George Carlin

 

[BonoFox1]

If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.
- - -Bobcat Goldthwait



If you have to be in a soap opera try not to get the worst role.
- - -Boy George

 

[BonoFox1]

you want to say it with flowers, a single rose says : "I'm cheap!"
- - -Delta Burke



It is useless to hold a person to anything he says while he's in love, drunk, or running for office.
- - -Shirley MacLaine

 

[BonoFox1]

Money will not make you happy, and happy will not make you money.
- - -Groucho Marx


Only time can heal your broken heart, just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs.
- - -Miss Piggy

 

[SoBe]

Be nice to your children, for they will choose your rest home.
- - -Phyllis Diller ...............

My 17 year old is always threatening my dh to be nice or he'll put him in the shabbiest nursing home. This quote made me think of that!

 

[BonoFox1]

Success is a great deodorant.
- - -Elizabeth Taylor



The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
- - -Lucille Ball

 

[BonoFox1]

My 17 year old is always threatening my dh to be nice or he'll put him in the shabbiest nursing home. This quote made me think of that!

LOL!!! be nice now!!

 

[BonoFox1]

The future will be better tomorrow.
- - -Dan Quayle


The fastest way to a man's heart is through his chest.
- - -Roseanne Arnold

 

[BonoFox1]

There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex. People should be very free with sex, they should draw the line at goats.
- - -Elton John .....................




You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans.
- - -Ronald Reagan

 

[BonoFox1]

Never purchase beauty products in a hardware store.
- - -Miss Piggy



Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got.
- - -Janis Joplin

 

[LikeNoOneBefore]

I love Katie Holmes!!!
-Tom Cruise


Kathy Griffin commenting on a Celine Dion concert: "So she comes out, sits down on the stage and goes, 'This next one...is for all the parents in the audience. And also...the children.' .................that's pretty much everybody, right?"

 

[BonoFox1]

"If you have intercourse you run the risk of dying and the ramifications of death are final.” — Cyndi Lauper


“[I hope] my child will be a good Catholic like me.” — Madonna

 

[BonoFox1]

"I’d rather be dead than singing Satisfaction when I’m forty-five.” — Mick Jagger



“It’s not that I dislike many people. It’s just that I don’t like many people.” — Bryant Gumbel

 

[BonoFox1]

"I look at [modeling] as something I’m doing for black people in general.” — model Naomi Campbell



"When I’m really hot, I can walk into a room and if a man doesn’t look at me, he’s probably gay.” — Kathleen Turner

 

[BonoFox1]

"When you say I committed adultery, are you stating before the marriage of 1996 or prior to?” — Dallas Cowboys cornerback Deion Sanders


"Listening to a woman is almost as bad as losing to one. There are only three things that women are better at than men: cleaning, cooking, and having sex.” — Charles Barkley

 

[BonoFox1]

"He speaks English, Spanish, and he’s bilingual too.” — Don King


"I never get bored, because there’s always different puzzles, I’m wearing different clothes, there’s different contestants, there’s different prizes.” — Vanna White

 

[BonoFox1]

"I was asked to come to Chicago because Chicago is one of our fifty-two states.” — Racquel Welch



"I’ve got taste. It’s inbred in me.” — David Hasselhoff

 

[BonoFox1]

"I cried over beauty, I cried over pain, and the other time I cried because I felt nothing. I can’t help it. I’m just a cliché of myself.” — Keanu Reeves


“You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror.” — George W. Bush

 

[BonoFox1]

"Too many OB/GYN’s aren’t able to practice their love with women all across the country.” — George W. Bush




Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?” — George W. Bush

 

[absintheminded]

Haha, looks like SOMEONE watched that television show of The Most Stupid Celeb Quotes...
LOVE THAT SHOW!!! KEEP IT UP!!!

 

[shart1780]

LOL Some of these are just ridiculous.

 

[shart1780]

Any idiot can get laid when they're famous. That's easy. It's getting laid when you're not famous that takes some talent.
- - -Kevin Bacon, 1996

Hahahahaha... that's great.

 

[LMP]

Maybe my favorite quote of all-time:

"I guess I'm gonna fade into Bolivian."
-- Mike Tyson

 

[BonoFox1]

Maybe my favorite quote of all-time:

"I guess I'm gonna fade into Bolivian."
-- Mike Tyson

Bolivian?? DOH!!!.....lol!!!!

 

[DreamOutLoud13]

She did - it's long been one of my faves. Complete tool.

She didn't

http://www.snopes.com/quotes/carey.htm

 

[BoMac]

My nipple."(i.e. dimple) — Malaysian singer Siti Nurhaliza when asked what her best facial feature was.

"I am not going to make a skeptical out of my boxing career." (i.e. spectacle) — Tonya Harding

"However, they delineate—quotas, I think, vulcanize society." (i.e. balkanize) - George W. Bush

"Mark Lee's arms went up like two giant testicles..." (i.e., tentacles) - Jack Dyer commenting on a VFL match (Mark Lee was a former Richmond ruckman)