Strangest conversation you've had recently?

[scatteroflight]

I'll get things started:

My friend: Look at my fedora! The lining is all torn! People always take it from me and treat it like...like hat meat!

Me: Hat meat?

Him: Meat...but made out of hats!

 

[nbcrusader]

Me: I'm hungry

Your friend: I have a meat hat

Me: Sound low carb!

 

[Aralitia]

Act 1, Scene 1, *Enter All* (Place: Bar)

Stranger: Would you like a ciggarette?

Uncle: No, not tonight, I'm driving

Stranger: Oh, okay, sorry about that

My Dad: *falls off seat laughing*

*Exeunt All*

Act 1, Scene 2. *Enter All* (Hotel room)

Brother: Susan whats that song I have in my head but can't remember it?

Me: "The animals came two by two hurrah hurrah"

Brother: That's the song!

Dad: *lmao* What's that song I can't remember hahahahaha

*Everyone falls asleep*

 

[meegannie]

 

[Bonochick]

Dad: Why do cotton pickers not have children?

BC: I don't know.

Dad: Because they have cottonballs!!!

BC: You're weird.

Dad: I thought of that one on my own when I saw your bag of cottonballs.

BC: That doesn't surprise me.

Dad: I want a cookie.

 

[ABEL]

i just had one strange 5way conversation on msn messenger

 

[U2girl02]

My tutee: What's the ad you've seen that you hate the most?

Me: Oh gosh... I dunno, probably one for juice boxes where the little juice box hops across the screen and taps the glass with its straw.

Tutee: Ohh. I hate those Herbal Essence ones. Shampoo doesn't do that to you! The lady sounds like she's being killed but having a hard time dying!

[My tutee is 11 ]

 

[Bonochick]

BC: I'm leaving.

Dad: Drive safely!

BC: One hand on the wheel, one hand on my drink.

Dad: That reminds me of that one song.

BC: What song?

Dad: *sings*

My eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord
She was driving through the alley in a pink and yellow Ford
With one hand on the throttle and the other on the bottle
Drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon beeeeeeeeeer!

BC: Okay...I'm leaving now...

Dad: Don't crash my car!

 

[HeartlandGirl]

Nurse: (filling out report for doctor) How do you spell 'lingerie'?

Me: L-i-n-g-e-r-i-e. Or you could just write 'bras and underwear'.

Nurse: He never understands what I write anyway.

 

[~LadyLemon~]

(at 11p.m. mom turns channel to E! for the Howard Stern show)

Mom: OH! Part two of the anal ring toss game with Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro!

Me: Oh boy...too bad I missed part one last night.

(on TV, an ugly guy from the Howard Stern show is repeatedly honking Carmen's breasts)

Me: OK, if I had a body and boobs like that, I would never in a million years let that guy grab me like that.

Mom: Oh, well he won the game of anal ring toss, and was able to negotiate with them to play with her breasts.



The joys of parental bonding

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

The joys of parental bonding

LOL.

I saw that last night, too when my dad was watching the show.

All these conversations are cracking me up. Let's see, the weirdest one I've had recently...

Probably one between my sister, my dad, and I a couple of days back in which we were talking about drugs (I think it had something to do with the whole thing Bush has said about steroids or something along that line), and we were talking about how some of the stuff that's illegal today was legal at one time, except for peyote (think that's how you spell it), and that Native Americans can still use it legally 'cause it's part of a religious ceremony. And my dad told my sister and I what it was made out of. So then my sister was saying how disgusting it was, and she had meant to say, "lizard droppings", but instead said, "Indian droppings", and it got into jokes about people eating human poop. . So it started off normal, and then got weird once the "Indian droppings" comment came in.

Yeah...anytime my dad and sister are around, it's pretty much a guarantee that a strange conversation will eventually come about.

Angela

 

[Squishy Peanut]

My friend: Yeah the gold in Dubai is a funny colour though...

Me: how so?

My friend: Well it's kinda yellowish...

Me: Ah. That'd be because it is, in fact, cheese not gold.

My friend: Ah right. That'd explain it.




Aaah the joys of senseless, early-morning conversations

 

[Cleasai]

i just had one strange 5way conversation on msn messenger

Abel dear, EVERY conversation you have is strange

 

[joyfulgirl]

Me: So, I know you're from Houston--what brought you here?

Casual Acquaintance/Dinner Companion: Well, life was going fine until one day I was diagnosed with a serious mental illness and the doctor said I needed to live in a low stress environment.

Me: (stunned silence)

Casual Acquaintance/Dinner Companion: Aren't you going to ask me what kind of serious mental illness I have?

Me: Yes, I'm dying to know. Please tell me.

Casual Acquaintance/Dinner Companion: I'm schizophrenic. But I'm doing very well on medication.

Me: Wow.

 

[JessicaAnn]

Me: So I was browsing on this U2 site today

Sister: What a surprise

Me: Anyway there was a thread about strange conversations. Someone had a strange conversation about hat meat.

Sister:












the preceeding conversation may or may not have actually happened ... it was developed for your personal amusement

 

[EPandAmerica]

Not so much strange as funny...

Phone *ring*

Me *hello*

Aunt *are you busy?*

Me *no. what?*

Aunt *on this dvd player, do you have to rewind the dvd before you take it out?*

Me * 'em no, just eject and turn it off.*

Aunt *you don't have to stop it or rewind it?*

Me* no.*

Aunt *okay bye*

Me *bye - hangs up*

Me *lmao*

Me *tells my 12 year old son the conversation*

Both of us *

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

Me: So I was browsing on this U2 site today

Sister: What a surprise

...sounds like a response my family members would make. .

Angela

 

[edge's girl]

my friend opened a msn conversation with "i like your pants around your feet"

i'm just like "hello to you to"

 

[ABEL]

"i like your pants around your feet"

now there's a pick up line

!

 

[ABEL]

don't hate me because i'm strange

Abel dear, EVERY conversation you have is strange

 

[BVS]

I don't remember the exact dialogue.

But some friends of mine and I were talking about why baby's pants are made with pockets. Baby's don't need pockets, what are they carrying around? Anyways this went on for about 30 minutes...we were all sleep deprived.

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

my friend opened a msn conversation with "i like your pants around your feet"

i'm just like "hello to you to"

...

Another gem from my sister, dad, and I last night:

Sister: *Talking online to a friend, and talking to her boyfriend on the phone at the same time* *Looks at screen* Who's "monkey butt?"

Me: MONKEY BUTT!

Sister: *Looks at me weird* Okay, no. *Into phone* You are not "monkey butt".

Pause...

Dad: You are not "monkey butt"?

Sister: *Laughs* Shut up! He (her boyfriend) said he was "monkey butt", and I said he wasn't.

Time goes on.

Sister: *Into phone* Caitlyn told me not to leave her alone with Richard Simmons.

Dad: You want a date with Richard Simmons? What?

Me: No. "Caitlyn told me not to leave her alone with Richard Simmons". . How that'd happen, I have no clue.

Another pause...

Me: Aaah! 'Kay, now I've got an image of Richard Simmons in my head!

******

Yeah, I'm inclined to believe my family smokes something....

Angela

 

[cell]

my friend opened a msn conversation with "i like your pants around your feet"

i'm just like "hello to you to"

i have a friend who'll open up some convo with pick up lines too. i get some really interesting openers. one of them comes to mind...


friend: bitch!

me: nice to see you too.

 

[beli]

now there's a pick up line

!

Thats the first line in some song that the radio is flogging to death at the moment. Cant remember the bands name, famous band, Nnnnnnn?

 

[edge's girl]

Thats the first line in some song that the radio is flogging to death at the moment. Cant remember the bands name, famous band, Nnnnnnn?

it's the opening line to the Nickelback song Figgured You Out. appaently he was listening to it at the time and felt the need to say "i like your pants around your feet" to everyone on his contacts list

 

[The_Sweetest_Thing]

*in Zoo lab, after dissecting animals*


Me: Uh, we need to open a new bottle of borelean.
Lab Dude: Uh sure.

*random 5 minutes of the two of us attempting to open bottle with a scalpel while holding animals still*

Lab dude: Got it!
Me: Um, no one needs it anymore.
Lab dude: Dammit.
Me: But I'm sure someone will appreciate it sometime. Maybe not today.
Lab dude: Maybe not tomorrow.
Me: But soon.
Lab dude: And for the rest of their lives....

 

[beli]

it's the opening line to the Nickelback song Figgured You Out. appaently he was listening to it at the time and felt the need to say "i like your pants around your feet" to everyone on his contacts list

As you do. Definitely qualifies as a strange conversation.

 

[Salome]

anna: JOHAN !!!!!!!!!
johan: ANNA !!!!!!!!!
anna: hello
johan: hello



meh, you had to be there

 

[Justified]

me to male friend: do you every criss-cross your velcro shoe straps?

male friend to me: no that is too urban and too cool for me to do, i prefer wearing my velcro shoes the way the should be worn. oh did i tell you that they are now selling WHITE velcro shoes?!

me:

him: yes i realize this conversation is weird.

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

*in Zoo lab, after dissecting animals*


Me: Uh, we need to open a new bottle of borelean.
Lab Dude: Uh sure.

*random 5 minutes of the two of us attempting to open bottle with a scalpel while holding animals still*

Lab dude: Got it!
Me: Um, no one needs it anymore.
Lab dude: Dammit.
Me: But I'm sure someone will appreciate it sometime. Maybe not today.
Lab dude: Maybe not tomorrow.
Me: But soon.
Lab dude: And for the rest of their lives....

...

Angela