Shuttlecock! Part IX - Squeezing out cocks of light

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Do we have to get approval from El Presidente?

And wow, that song is going to be tough one way or the other.

I'm officially intimidated.
 
That's my point.

I have an instructional badminton sheet from my current badminton unit in school. Hopefully there's some untapped vocabulary in there. Otherwise, this will be redundant.
 
"A Sort Of Cock Coming"

And you know it's time to run
To a serve that's soon to come
Across the court of clay, to a cock that's in the distance

And you hunger for the serve
Time to return, forehand time
And your slice moves above the net that stands before you

Oh, oh, oh....
To returned cocks we run!
I'll be there, I'll be there before the first bounce
A lob, a lobbed shot out from here.

The city's courts are all run down
With Lancemoms all around
See hookers with genitalia that once
Gave some resistance

And we serve at the top of the court
We swing our racquets, and the birdies explode!
Exhausted, dehydrated
The players grow weary and head home

O swing away, o swing away, o swing, o swing away, I say I
O swing away, o swing away, o swing, o swing away, I say I

Oh, oh, oh....
To returned cocks we run!
And still we run, we run and don't look back
I'll be there, I'll be there before the first bounce
Before that first bounce

I'll be there before that first bounce, I believe
Before that first bounce, so high
I'll be there

Oh swing away, I say, o swing away, I say.

The cocks will crack in service time
This bomb-blast racquet waltz.
No broken cocks, just a swing
Tonight we'll serve a cock, across the net and court
See the birdie, the flying cock
She will be served and returned again...tonight

And your heart beats so fast
After chasing the cock that's long flown past
Across the court of clay, to a cock that was once in the distance
Oh, don't sorrow, no don't weep
For tonight, Lance's mom, will be at your home
You are coming home
 
While Boner overuses the shouting on this album, the shouts on Cock-Being Engorged are fucking epic.
 
phillyfan26 said:
Shuttlecock
Click to expand...

2q390lf.gif
 
LemonMelon said:
"A Sort Of Cock Coming"

And you know it's time to run
To a serve that's soon to come
Across the court of clay, to a cock that's in the distance

And you hunger for the serve
Time to return, forehand time
And your slice moves above the net that stands before you

Oh, oh, oh....
To returned cocks we run!
I'll be there, I'll be there before the first bounce
A lob, a lobbed shot out from here.

The city's courts are all run down
With Lancemoms all around
See hookers with genitalia that once
Gave some resistance

And we serve at the top of the court
We swing our racquets, and the birdies explode!
Exhausted, dehydrated
The players grow weary and head home

O swing away, o swing away, o swing, o swing away, I say I
O swing away, o swing away, o swing, o swing away, I say I

Oh, oh, oh....
To returned cocks we run!
And still we run, we run and don't look back
I'll be there, I'll be there before the first bounce
Before that first bounce

I'll be there before that first bounce, I believe
Before that first bounce, so high
I'll be there

Oh swing away, I say, o swing away, I say.

The cocks will crack in service time
This bomb-blast racquet waltz.
No broken cocks, just a swing
Tonight we'll serve a cock, across the net and court
See the birdie, the flying cock
She will be served and returned again...tonight

And your heart beats so fast
After chasing the cock that's long flown past
Across the court of clay, to a cock that was once in the distance
Oh, don't sorrow, no don't weep
For tonight, Lance's mom, will be at your home
You are coming home
Click to expand...


El Mel, perhaps your finest hour so far. Bravo! A perfect blend of badminton and whordeom.

Also, looks like we know what someone's new nickname is.

NO BROKEN COCKS!
 
phillyfan26 said:
I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. Now go home and change.

Once we have even more lyrics and album covers, it'll be fucking epic.
Click to expand...

Well I made an Achtung, Birdie cover already. And I wrote "Staring at the Cock." So there's that.

Sorry I left you guys alone, cock-in-hand all weekend.
 
phillyfan26 said:
Can you link me to Achtung Birdie's cover?
Click to expand...

achtungbirdiesv8.jpg


JAl HO!

Nets are stretching over grass
Birdies soaring past
In the bracket of a tourney
Shuttlecock served straight to me
Straight to me then straight to you
Held together with cock glue
We're gonna get sweatier soon
It's a been a long, hot set
Whack it over the net
Don't try to hard to swing, don't swing at all

I'm not the only one staring at the cock
Afraid of where it lands, in the court or in the stands
Give that bird a knock, staring at the cock
Not the only team who's happy to move on

There's an umpire in your ear
If you whine he won't disappear
In this match, he is the king
Don't want to see what complaining brings
Birdie falls right out of reach
Rallying would be a feat
Will we escape in one piece?
Cause those who come through often have to
Those who come through, often they will beat

Other jocks staring at the cock
Afraid of where it lands, in the court or in the stands
Give that bird a knock, staring at the cock
Not the only team who's happy to move on

Birdies falling all around
Other team just won't go down
Badminton shoes, red and black
Opposition rallies back
Referee won't blow the whistle
God guides cocks but will he listen
I'm nearly great
But my racquet's whiffing
I left it in the locker room
That nylon cock once belonged to me

I'm not the only one staring at the cock
Afraid of where it lands, in the court or in the stands
Give that bird a knock, staring at the cock
Not the only team who's happy to move on
 
Okay so I've been away on a voyage of discovery, falling crazy in love with a new Shuttlecock record, and now I just need to know if anyone else caved over the weekend (cori and martha, I'm looking at you) and if not, why you don't stand up for your love?
 
Please tell me that I did not write "Knife Crime" in vain. Piss, if you do not include that on your web site, all of you will die, one by one.

And, Canadiens????? Nice, welcome back.

RISK, DO YOU PLAY MOTHERFUCKER?????
 
No spoken words said:
Please tell me that I did not write "Knife Crime" in vain. Piss, if you do not include that on your web site, all of you will die, one by one.
Click to expand...

Don't make NO BROKEN COCKS resort to knife crime, Danimal. Jewish knife crime = a mission from God, and we don't want to mess with Him.
 
I don't know you
And you don't know the rules of this
I had a starring role
I was the first guy who held serve
They said be careful where you aim
Cause where you aim you just might hit
Hold onto your racquet so tight
While we match wits
Faulting around
The ref says that it's all fair game
The rules he can remember
But he's trying to forget

It was a dirty play
Dirty play

I'm looking for explanations
Ref don't even understand
If you need to win a game
Hit a cock in the air
Try not to look so guilty

From shuttler to foe
In one match, ref lets go
A fault that isn't known
Shuttler to foe

If you cheat...won't avoid knife crime
Cheat...won't avoid knife crime
Cheat...won't avoid knife crime

Get it right
There's no cock finer than goose
Watch how I play
Rules as simple as Lance's Mom is loose

Wise up
Some rules you can't get around
I'll beat you
More so when the bird falls to the ground

These plays, play, plays run away like birdies over the net



________________________________________________________


You know he held the bird
And then he served away
He used to stay alert
To drive the cocks he saw away
He wanted to believe
In the hands of cock

His hand it felt heavy
As he came across the court
His mind it started reeling
Like a bird without a skirt
In the howling wind
In the howling wind

He went deeper into back
Deeper to the side
He could see the lights gleem
Like a shuttlecock in flight

He felt the shuttling
Shuttling, shuttling, shuttling hands of cock
Like the lights shiny, shiny from above

A hand on his racquet
Fingering the tape
The handle weighed heavy
His heart he could feel was beating, beating
Beating, beating, beating
Forty - love, forty - love
Forty - love, forty - love

Forty - love

See the hands that lob
Can also strike down
The hands of cock
 
Added some of the lyrics. Still need to do Cock-o-War, Shuttle & Bum, Achtung Birdie (Love Is Badminton), Poppycock (Staring at the Cock), ATYCLC, and HTDAAS (Miracle Cock).
 
joyfulgirl said:
Okay so I've been away on a voyage of discovery, falling crazy in love with a new Shuttlecock record, and now I just need to know if anyone else caved over the weekend (cori and martha, I'm looking at you) and if not, why you don't stand up for your love?
Click to expand...

I only let the 'Cock get to first base: I listened to Breathe once.

I'm still holding out till March 3rd, which makes February the longest month ever.
 
martha said:
I only let the 'Cock get to first base: I listened to Breathe once.

I'm still holding out till March 3rd, which makes February the longest month ever.
Click to expand...

Breathe is fantastic.

I am sorry I didn't download it right away. That's two extra days I could have been loving this record. :wink:
 
I still haven't caved. :wave:

One week and one day to go - I can make it from here, no problem. Tomorrow I'm going to listen to the alternate NLOTH, but that's it.

I have the idea in my head of how I want to hear the record for the first time, and that's what I'm going to do. It's not about depriving myself or some weird ploy to get attention here or anything else.

:)
 
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