Ryan Adams Raps

The friendliest place on the web for anyone that follows U2.
If you have answers, please help by responding to the unanswered posts.
Someone transcribed it:

~~~~~~

awwwww shit!
look who got a website-

thats right-

dot com,
what the fuck

new york city
whats up!

staten island!

ancient Sumarians !
[anna sarris]
oh shit!

well if i could get around to my rhymes
then i could destory galaxies
of alternative country wannabes
with a bottle of whiskey and a wizard and a mime
until then-
dot com mother fucker!

new york city

staten island- yo!

[anna sarris] oh

[anna sarris] yr out of this world like ancient sumarians
apparently we came from samarians
that came down and gave the world a bunch of technology
because they wanted to clone themselves
so that we could maybe be on the earth
and get some stuff that they needed for the planet
but then they had to split so
they went to another planet
and we stayed here
and now we just yell at each other and have millkshakes
hi anna!

oh shit [anna sarris]
yr a g-g-g-g-genius

kevin bacon what the fuck!

well these streets are digital roads
going into yr mind like yr finger with yr nose
and yr nose was suckin coke and drinks [and knee?]
trippin too hard and gotta pee
what was you [thinkin/does-in] kevin bacon makin
waterworld three they didnt even make two yet
yo that was costner partner

kevincostner.com what the fuck!

2003!

updated by witches!

this website's updated by witches,
witches, witches and me-
weird witches roamin' across the lake with their hair on fire
and their nails long screaming at animals and people
and they going crazy and they need to take a break from recording

oh shit thats a long record!

c-c-c-critics!

one and a half stars, yeah!

oh shit-
one and a half stars
3 records sold
my record went balsa wood
in india or someplace that im not from
you know what im saying man-

and then the guy goes
his records are very long and sappy
basically he's alternative country but crappy
 
That is the most brilliant thing ever. :love:

EDIT: Acient sumerians
Awwwwww shit! :lmao:
 
I think Ryan Adams should challenge Conor Oberst to a non-stop, cage match, battle royale to the death for Indietastic supremacy.

*cues Star Trek fight music*
 
Gee...maybe next, Ryan will do a rap about how he got his most popular fan message board shutdown because he thought that the negative things being said about him and the Cardinals were damaging to them.

:mad:

Yeah, I'm quite annoyed at present and hoping there is more to the story...otherwise...that is pretty lame. But, presently, that is how it is coming off. :happy:
 
Last edited:
Well, Ryan sure has ticked off an awful lot of people. There is some nasty stuff being said....and I had to laugh at this picture...



ryanadamsdotorg.jpg
 
OMG...:love:

you know what this reminds me of?

that scene in "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" when Jay and Silent Bob go around the country sucker punching every person that ever said anything bad about them on the internet.
 
New "biography" posted on his site:

The Cardinals are a band focused on music and are based on the planet Earth, a satellite of Sol or "The Sun" the center of the galaxy. They rely heavily on naps, food, metal, reggae mixes and comps scored from Kim's Video right when they are closing to make this one guy even more mad at people who don't know as much as he knows about music and movies, and are guided by the rainbows and fairy tales Robie tells us at night when we are being rocked softly to sleep to the sounds of his magic harp made of candy and strung with the hair of unicorns.

We also rock and will make you cry and want to fuck. Sometimes even fuck metal or large stone objects like pyramids or goblets of fire. Whatever.

a brief summary of Cardinal-speak.

1. HalloweenHead.
A fan of The Cardinals music. stoner. outcast. someone who doesn't know what kind of mood they are in. Not sponsored by Bud Lite or collecting girls or guys numbers during a quiet breakdown. usually are laid back and engage in mellow conversation with band members when seen in arcades or getting food. Don't ask for shit when people are eating. not gravity challenged but reality challenged. also known as Bed-Heads, or Chandler Bings.

2. Rubberneckers.
Loud assholes. People in restrooms who ask you to sign a ticket in Arby's when you are taking a leak. Usually wearing ball caps and or would like you to get drunk with them immediately in their truck. (Identifiable trait......approaches band member and asks, "when is the next Whiskeytown record coming out?" or "I like your last record "Gold""

3. Eggs.
Smart girls. Or cabbage. Or "The Goods"

4. Egyptology.
Any Riff beginning and ending in the D-Scale which can be morphed into one of 50 or so songs in this scale.

5. Bruce Wayne.
A Heavy Spin Out. Not a "Jam" A "Freak"

6. A Freak.
A spin-out

7. Heavy Strange.
Like Space, made popular by the grateful dead by if played by Black Sabbath, if Black Sabbath just spun out and were all Hallowenheaded.

8. Ming Dynasty.
When the shit hits the fan, not the fans.

9. A Knoxer.
Bad gig, seated area wise, not stage area wise.

10. The Plateau-
Good gig. Stage Wise, audience wise not factoring

11. Facemelt.
Gig that starts and ends Plateau.

12. Ryder.
Class gig start to end. audience and band. (no relation to Easy Ryder the movie or Ryder trucks)

13. Boxing Match
Tough gig that ends good.

14. Burger King
Horrible American over processed food that is consistent enough to keep singers from sickness with the help of orange juice and lots of vitamins (not recommended but it keeps it real, also does not cause flub, not when yr shredded from three night (or ten straight on the plateau)

15. Sausage.
Meat brains, violent dudes.

16. "Got Shined by the Twins"
Means got stared down by the greasies after the gig thinking Motley Crue stuff was possible with band (not possible)

17. Googled Messed with.

18. Old Kids.
dudes with the green hats that think the harmonica is going to come out (its not)

19. Missing in Action.
bad amps

20. Deffers.
HalloweenHeads who cant get enough of the amp section (gotta love 'em) they say "what? A lot) I say that a lot too.

21. Spacewolf.
Chris

22. Slyder.
Jon (AKA Flameout, or The Wanderer

23. B or TN-T
Monster that is Brad

24. MCNC
Neal
25. Mouth
Reg

................I made most of this up so some of it is accurate and some of it is subject to change. as soon as it changes it reverts back to the way you don't know from before which is what.

And remember, the don't call us , "The Good Old Always Quiet Stick To The Set No Lasers Or Egg Talk Not Too Many Songs Focused On The Safe Always Sunny Good Ole Safecracking Skydiving Number One Middle Name Cardinals" for Nothing.

See You at Prom (the gig) HHeads.

Later.
 
Back
Top Bottom