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Old 08-28-2001, 06:06 AM   #16
The Fly
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1 Elephant (medium)
Brown Gravy (Watkins Beef Soup & Gravy Base)
Watkins Sea Salt & Watkins Pepper
Two Rabbits (optional)

Cut elephant into small bite sized pieces. This should take only about two months. Add enough gravy to cover.
Cook over kerosene fire for about four weeks at 465 degrees. Makes about 3,800 servings. To extend it add rabbits, but do this only if necessary as most people do not like to find hare in their stew.

"I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens", Woody Allen

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Old 08-30-2001, 08:57 AM   #17
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Blue's Quicker Picker Upper:

You will need:
1 bottle vodka

-Open the bottle.
-Swig from the bottle.
-Repeat as necessary.


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Old 08-31-2001, 02:27 AM   #18
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buncha jokers we're talking serious stuff here you know

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Old 08-31-2001, 03:58 AM   #19
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Hmm. You know fors, my fave kitchen item is my wok.

I usuaslly raid the fridsge for veggies, some meat if we have any, chuck in some sauce: oyster, soy, beef and black bean whatever, and bobs your uncle. The beauty of my simplistic approach to cooking is 1. you can never stuff it up, 2. rice goes with pretty much anything you cook with and 3. you can use whatever meat or just veggies you want.

My fave of the month is:
1 mushroom (the big ones)
1 green (or red) capsicum
1 onion
couple of carrots
broccoli if you like it
bamboo shoots
water chestnuts
and a slab of boneless meat (insert fave type here)

drop some oil in the pan (wok) cook your veg for a bit, drain and add meat with sauce, brown it up, add the veggies again. Steam the rice and you even have some for leftovers or lunch the next day

Another fave is my latest fish dish
get a slab of fish. bream or trout works best, cos cod is kinda too yellow.
in a flat frying pan put in a mix of lemon juice and marg (if you need it). get some potato flour or rice flour and mix it with some wedge sprinkle (near the salt and pepper in the supermarket) also add in as much pepper as you like. soak the fish bits in more lemon juice and then coat liberally (i love that word in cooking!) with the dry mix of flour sprinkle and pepper. pop it in the hot pan and fry. Dont use any oil or anything though.
Steam some broccoli, zucchini, spuds and cauliflower. Make some white sauce and chop up some chives to mix in it.

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Old 09-01-2001, 12:19 AM   #20
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I haven't replied to a topic in weeks, but you got me with this one, foray.. I love to cook and i really love to eat! Here are some of my favorites at the moment:

1. Very Simple Fetuccine with Fresh Vegetables

(I'm approximating the quantities here because i made this up myself. Feel free to add or substitute vegetables depending on taste and availabitly)

8 oz. Fetuccine pasta
Several handfuls of fresh green (string) beans, whole
1 very large ripe tomato or 2-3 small ones, diced into large chunks
1/2 or 1 whole red bell pepper, cut into large pieces
Fresh cilantro (aka fresh coriander) or basil or parsely, chopped
Romano or Parmesan cheese (not Kraft), shredded
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Salt and Pepper to taste

Add pasta to boiling water. Cooking time for fetuccine is seven minutes. During the last 3 minutes of cooking time, add the fresh green beans to the boling water. Drain. Toss pasta and green beans with olive oil. Add fresh tomatoes, fresh red bell peppers, salt, pepper, and more olive oil (if desired) to each individual serving and combine. Top with romano or parmesan cheese and fresh herb of choice.

2. Very Simple Filet of Fish

Filet of (preferably fresh) fish of your choice
Very thinly sliced rounds of onion, depending on taste
Olive Oil
Fresh cilantro or parsley
Fresh lime or lemon
Salt & Pepper

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees (this even works in a small toaster-oven).
Place filet(s) in small Pyrex dish (or other oven safe dish ... heavy-duty tin foil even works if you make it with edges so the juices don't drip)
Brush filet(s) with olive oil, top with onions, and sprinkle with lime, herbs, salt and pepper on both sides.
Bake uncovered for about 10 minutes or longer depending on thickness of the filet.

3. My Favorite Sandwich

One plain Bagel--fresh or frozen ("Lender's Big & Crusty," highly recommended),sliced in two and toasted.
Spread Cream Cheese on both sides.
Add slices of turkey breast.
Top with tomato slices and alfalfa (or other little green) sprouts (lettuce can be substituted here..i know sprouts are sort of a weird thing to like). Mmmm...enjoy!

[This message has been edited by grace (edited 08-31-2001).]
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Old 09-05-2001, 07:28 AM   #21
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One baguette, melt cheese on top under grill. Add Worcesteshire sauce and black pepper.
Enjoy! Its actually very good!
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Old 09-05-2001, 12:53 PM   #22
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Here's a easy recipy

1 tub o' ice cream
1 spoon

Put the spoon in the tub o' ice cream.

Take the spoon out of the tub an (this is very important) make sure that the spoon is covered in ice cream.

Put the ice cream covered spoon in your mouth.

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Old 09-08-2001, 11:28 AM   #23
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Old 09-08-2001, 08:09 PM   #24
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Okay, a good, simple recipe -- but the idea doesn't occur to many people:


Just put the three ingrediates on a slice of bread in the order above.

OH, and be prepared for messy eating.

- Achtung Bubba
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Old 09-09-2001, 12:47 AM   #25
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Very cool, folks. Thanks! Hey I got a few simple ones; they're healthy too.

Tofu #1

Tofu - the very soft kind, and not silken tofu
light soya sauce
oyster sauce
garlic, chopped
spring onions & fried onions (for garnish)

Steam tofu (large chunks so it doesn't crack up easily), add both sauces according to how salty you want it, add garlic. Steam for 20 mins thereabouts. Serve with garnish.

Tofu #2

Tofu, doesn't have to be soft this time
ginger, the more the better
chilli, just a smidgen
light soya sauce - or any light sauce, really, inc. Japanese sauces.

Marinade tofu with ginger, sauce, 1/8 teaspoon of chilli (depends on how hot you can take it) and a little water added. Leave for a few hours. Stirfry. You may add dried shrimps/spring onions/oyster sauce/anything you want.


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