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Old 01-04-2004, 05:35 AM   #1
The Fly
 
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Personals:

ATTN:

ManPanion

I seek you out!

Don't be shy, for this is strictly a business relationship, with benefits!

Requirements:

1) two pairs of socks, one utility belt
2) years of repressed inhibition,
3) no pre-disposed allergies to licra, spandex, or superhero adhesives
4) a devotion to justice and literature of Agamemnonic Combat.

Duties:

1) diligence in protecting the weak, and pinning the guilty
2) possibly some weekend pen-pushing
3) posing for various naked superhero aliases... you know, passports for disguises... in, naked countries.
4) writing letters to the families of innocent bystanders, and disappearing various supervillain offspring.
5) painting my silhouettes... it happens to coincide with laundry day, so that will be a nude duty as well.

Supervillains need not respond,

Send a personal photo, and detailed physique dimensions to:

GARY#2
AGD Hideout
Manland.



Justice!
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Old 01-04-2004, 05:49 AM   #2
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ATTN:

Seeking the Verbose, and Subversively Juvenile

Must exhibit insecurity and pretention in the delivery of messages and posts. Extensive use of sexually suggestive euphemisms, and winks, a staunch requirement. Familiar with shit disturbery, and obscure trivial knowledge from the past century in the areas of science, spatulas, women's fashion, and handsome balding men.

Only those with a propensity to invade threads, and compromise their direction need respond.

Pinball Wizard
Soho
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Old 01-04-2004, 07:45 AM   #3
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Old 01-04-2004, 11:01 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pinball Wizard
ATTN:

Seeking the Verbose, and Subversively Juvenile

Must exhibit insecurity and pretention in the delivery of messages and posts. Extensive use of sexually suggestive euphemisms, and winks, a staunch requirement. Familiar with shit disturbery, and obscure trivial knowledge from the past century in the areas of science, spatulas, women's fashion, and handsome balding men.

Only those with a propensity to invade threads, and compromise their direction need respond.

Pinball Wizard
Soho
~*~*wIlL yOu MaRrY mE???????!!!!!!!*~*~

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Old 01-04-2004, 02:16 PM   #5
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Old 01-04-2004, 02:27 PM   #6
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Old 01-04-2004, 02:27 PM   #7
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Re: Personals:

Quote:
Originally posted by GARY#2
ATTN:

ManPanion

I seek you out!

Don't be shy, for this is strictly a business relationship, with benefits!

Requirements:

1) two pairs of socks, one utility belt
2) years of repressed inhibition,
3) no pre-disposed allergies to licra, spandex, or superhero adhesives
4) a devotion to justice and literature of Agamemnonic Combat.

Duties:

1) diligence in protecting the weak, and pinning the guilty
2) possibly some weekend pen-pushing
3) posing for various naked superhero aliases... you know, passports for disguises... in, naked countries.
4) writing letters to the families of innocent bystanders, and disappearing various supervillain offspring.
5) painting my silhouettes... it happens to coincide with laundry day, so that will be a nude duty as well.

Supervillains need not respond,

Send a personal photo, and detailed physique dimensions to:

GARY#2
AGD Hideout
Manland.



Justice!
Dear Gary,

I saw your job posting on website and would like to be given a chance to prove my worth. I think I fit most all of your requirements. I also could 'handle' all of the duties, and then some!

Feel free to notice my personal picture in my avatar. Also feel free to notice certain bulges.

I've enclosed a doctored photo to show how me may be able to 'work' together. I hope you enjoy.
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Old 01-04-2004, 02:36 PM   #8
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I will *NOT* be applying.

Thank you
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Old 01-04-2004, 03:55 PM   #9
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:check you PM box.

A "special" note for you!
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Old 01-04-2004, 04:27 PM   #10
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I think you should take Malibu Whortense up on her offer.
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Old 01-04-2004, 05:10 PM   #11
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Old 01-04-2004, 07:00 PM   #12
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Old 01-04-2004, 07:43 PM   #13
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Whortense, I am honoured to ask for your hand, to sign this pre-nup.

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Old 01-04-2004, 08:56 PM   #14
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ATTN:

Southern Floozy

Looking for a girl with class and tact, who's not afraid to reveal her opinion through a vacant expression or smilie. Those with a superiority complex and sub par sardonic radar are a must; exceptions made if you can pull off the rare, yet wholly under appreciated, vantage of indifference that unsuccessfully attempts to demean those who don't have a permanent fusilli jerry up their ass.

Applicants will be required for a lifetime of human shield work, protecting the microphone/pa check guy from the debris projected by a rowdy crowd of resentful creed fans.

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Old 01-04-2004, 09:15 PM   #15
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Well, thwarted in love once again!

Isn't there just a Prince looking for his Princess?
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