Music/Band Jokes....

[BonoFox1]

Top Ten Things Overheard At The Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame Inductions


10. "Bono, Yoko. Yoko, Bono"
9. "I'm sorry, but no one under 18 will be admitted unless they're Bill
Wyman's date"
8. "Jerry Garcia couldn't make it tonight -- here to accept on his behalf
is a bearded fat guy we pulled in off the street"
7. "Is that feedback or is Yoko Ono singing?"
6. "Here, take Cesar Romero's seat"
5. "How did Tonya Harding get voted in?"
4. "What a coincidence, Mr. McCartney! I played you in the Chicago cast of
'Beatlemania', and now I'm your waiter!"
3. "On no, they're letting Letterman perform!"
(Here they showed the now famous clip of a guy that looks like Dave
playing the violin and singing "Camptown Races")
2. "Earthquake! Oh wait, Meat Loaf just fell off his chair"
1. "Run for your life it's Elton John's hair!"

 

[BonoFox1]

"Names for the Rolling Stones' Tour"

As presented on the May 4, 1994 (5/4/94) broadcast of LATE SHOW with
DAVID LETTERMAN

10. Van Full of Grandpas
9. The Rolling Stones Live Plus Keith Richards
8. Guitar-playin' Geezers
7. Brown Sugar and Lots of Bran
6. Metamusic
5. The "$140 Million in the Bank Isn't Enough" Tour
4. Cocoon 3
3. Hey! You! Get Offa My Barcalounger!
2. "Instruments Hooked Up to the Clapper" Tour
1. Grumpy Old Men

 

[BonoFox1]

Did you hear the news that Willie Nelson died last night?


Yeah I heard he was hit by a car, he was playing On the Road Again!

 

[BonoFox1]

Q. What is forty feet long and has eight teeth?




A. The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.

 

[BonoFox1]

Madonna is now in trouble with Jewish Rabbis for using the name of the founder of the Kabbalah in one of her songs. They say their leader's name should only be used in a place where no one will profit.
You know, like Madonna's movies.

 

[BonoFox1]

George Michael entered a public toilet, hoping to spend a penny.
He then came out with two coppers.

 

[BonoFox1]

Apparently, a girl woke up out of a coma when listening to James Blunt but compare that to the people he's put into a coma...
Out of a coma: 1.

Into a coma: 99,977,866,554....

 

[BonoFox1]

Do you know 50 Cent's half brother's name?



25 Cent.

 

[BonoFox1]

Q: Why couldn't G-Unit get on the bus?


A: Because they didn't have 50

 

[BonoFox1]

What is 50 cent called when he's in Canada?



58 cent

 

[LikeNoOneBefore]

What is 50 cent called when he's in Canada?



58 cent

Very lame, but very funny.

 

[Eliv8]

Top Ten Things Overheard At The Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame Inductions


10. "Bono, Yoko. Yoko, Bono"
9. "I'm sorry, but no one under 18 will be admitted unless they're Bill
Wyman's date"
8. "Jerry Garcia couldn't make it tonight -- here to accept on his behalf
is a bearded fat guy we pulled in off the street"
7. "Is that feedback or is Yoko Ono singing?"
6. "Here, take Cesar Romero's seat"
5. "How did Tonya Harding get voted in?"
4. "What a coincidence, Mr. McCartney! I played you in the Chicago cast of
'Beatlemania', and now I'm your waiter!"
3. "On no, they're letting Letterman perform!"
(Here they showed the now famous clip of a guy that looks like Dave
playing the violin and singing "Camptown Races")
2. "Earthquake! Oh wait, Meat Loaf just fell off his chair"
1. "Run for your life it's Elton John's hair!"

Brill

 

[Lancemc]

If you know what movie this is from, then you deserve candy.

Wayne's World 2 right? Where's my candy!

 

[Zoots]

Wayne's World 2 right? Where's my candy!

 

[LMP]

Wayne's World 2 right? Where's my candy!

like old Jack Burton always says, the check's in the mail.

 

[Sue DeNym]

These are great!

http://www.mit.edu/people/jcb/jokes/

http://www.maui.net/~pbm/jokes.html

http://www.ahajokes.com/music_jokes.html

http://www.northvalley.net/jokes/musicjokes.shtml

One day, a banjo player went to his favorite folk music coffee shop to set up his next concert. He left his instrument in the back seat of his car. "Don't leave your car unlocked!" warned the coffee shop owner. "Someone might break in!"

But the banjo player didn't listen and went into the shop, leaving his instrument in his unlocked car. Sure enough, when he came back, the car had been broken into.

And five other banjos had been left in the back seat.