Mollie's Nipple, Utah Superthread

[The Sad Punk]

Stunningly enough, it wasn't! Wow, a typo that got past me. Remarkable.

Well, it's good to see that alcohol has some effect on you, at least.

Exactly; pizza is hard to fuck up. As long as you put on half-decent ingredients and cook it long enough, people are sure to enjoy it. Will have to learn more about Indian. Wish my Indian neighbour was still my neighbour rather than somebody who has disappeared out of my life - I bet he could have taught me a lot.

Pretty much, yeah. You tell someone you're making pizza for tea, and they're happy. Even if it doesn't turn out that good, they're still happy because they ate pizza. Pizza is the great leveller. Even vegans can make some type of crappy pizza that they can be happy and elitist about.

Oh, if you knew him then that would have been really useful, I think learning directly from someone is better than learning from a recipe you found on Google. And every family seems to make their own special, unique food, too. There's an enormous difference between the dal made by one of my sister's best friends and the dal I eat at the food court for lunch on a Tafe day. They're both delicious, though.

FUCK, Australia, you had a golden opportunity there and blew it! You may be 40-3, but you don't deserve it. Most underwhelming, unspectacular 40-3 ever.

Hah, and you know, the news tomorrow will be all talking about how great and unstoppable Australia was playing, even if it's the case like now where an under 14 team could thrash the opponent.

By the way, what would you say is the best team in the Northern Hemisphere, out of curiosity?

Can I be Minister for Transport?

But of course!

 

[Axver]

OK, pinot gris 5 - 1 tawny port. I feel a bit on the drunk side of life right now. Hmm, pinot gris or more of the port? I mean, wow, the pinot gris is awesome, and I feel like I should save it, but then it seems like something better in larger quantities, given the way it opens up and reveals itself. The fruity spices are so strong and delicious.

I'm a wine ponce even when I'm drunk, aren't I?

 

[Axver]

Hey, Channel 7, why do you ask the most inane questions to the captains once the game is over?

Oh, that's right, because you can't fucking cover sport.

That was one of the most mediocre post-match interviews I've ever seen. And Australia is about to get owned in the Tri-Nations.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Yeah, I still write. Haven't done so much since about April, when uni got really busy, but last summer, I wrote very intensely. My style used to be focused on action-adventure, but now you can tell I'm a Dostoevsky fan and that I like to explore religious matters in a socio-cultural and socio-political context (as opposed to dealing with them theologically). The Axvers have passed into history though; I now associate the name far too much with myself. Bit of a shame, really, but I don't have the passion for writing action-adventure as I used to.

Heh, cool. Speaking of India, I suspect that my actual last name is a fraud, created by my great-grandfather after he abandoned the British Army in India. My grandmother believes this could be plausible. The general agreement is that he took a new name upon arriving in New Zealand in order to start anew with life. Whatever the case, we have no idea where my last name comes from, or what my great-grandfather's origins were. He took that to his grave.

5th glass just about done. Feeling intoxicated even if I may not seem it. Whee.

Hey, cool, I wouldn't mind reading some of your work sometime, if that's okay. I'm not really in the mood now, but yeah, feel free to send something anytime. I wouldn't feel ashamed if you write very similar to one of your favourite authors, the stuff I wrote back in high school was very Donald Barthelme. The only fiction I'm really looking at right now is that comic book I'm gonna make sometime, once the plot's complete in my head.

I think you told me about that before, but I have to see it's still very interesting. I saw your last name when you showed us your "legally blind" card, and though it was nothing surprising, I was kind of wondering when that name had become a surname, to be honest!

Get some more into ya, you're still typing as well as I am and I'm only drinking beer!

 

[The Sad Punk]

OK, pinot gris 5 - 1 tawny port. I feel a bit on the drunk side of life right now. Hmm, pinot gris or more of the port? I mean, wow, the pinot gris is awesome, and I feel like I should save it, but then it seems like something better in larger quantities, given the way it opens up and reveals itself. The fruity spices are so strong and delicious.

I'm a wine ponce even when I'm drunk, aren't I?

This is kind of funny, in an informative way.

You're drunk? Hmm, I'm not sure about that, you seem to be able to remember the alphabet!

 

[Axver]

OK, back to the port. Not sure I seem very drunk here, but honestly, if you were here - I think I seem drunk. I'm good at controlling myself, but I'm talking louder (I have a habit of talking to myself even when sober, especially during the rugby, since I'm so used to talking to other people during rugby games).

Man, this port is amazing. I don't care that it's Wolf Blass. Just the flavours - oh yes. Delicious. And it's so smooth, so enjoyable to drink.

 

[The Sad Punk]

OK, back to the port. Not sure I seem very drunk here, but honestly, if you were here - I think I seem drunk. I'm good at controlling myself, but I'm talking louder (I have a habit of talking to myself even when sober, especially during the rugby, since I'm so used to talking to other people during rugby games).

Man, this port is amazing. I don't care that it's Wolf Blass. Just the flavours - oh yes. Delicious. And it's so smooth, so enjoyable to drink.

No, I'm sure you're pretty messy in the head over there, to some extent I can control what I'm writing pretty well when I'm more than tipsy. Further, you would like to keep the reputation of not misspelling stuff, so you're probably more devoted to making sure everything's in the right place than I am.

 

[Axver]

Well, it's good to see that alcohol has some effect on you, at least.

I think I'm able to control my typing just because I'm always so fucking anal about it. Though the rational thought, I can't explain.

Pretty much, yeah. You tell someone you're making pizza for tea, and they're happy. Even if it doesn't turn out that good, they're still happy because they ate pizza. Pizza is the great leveller. Even vegans can make some type of crappy pizza that they can be happy and elitist about.

Oh, if you knew him then that would have been really useful, I think learning directly from someone is better than learning from a recipe you found on Google. And every family seems to make their own special, unique food, too. There's an enormous difference between the dal made by one of my sister's best friends and the dal I eat at the food court for lunch on a Tafe day. They're both delicious, though.

Believe it or not, I've had vegan pizza! One person I visited in the US was vegan and got out some pizza for dinner with me. I thought it was actually really good, bizarrely enough. Though not long after I left, she went to her doctor and he said she was so unhealthy that he literally forced her to stop being vegan.

Yeah, I'm pissed I lost contact with him. I still have his mobile number; might have to re-establish contact. I really enjoyed that Indian dinner, not to mention the food that said neighbour gave me while he was still my neighbour.

Hah, and you know, the news tomorrow will be all talking about how great and unstoppable Australia was playing, even if it's the case like now where an under 14 team could thrash the opponent.

By the way, what would you say is the best team in the Northern Hemisphere, out of curiosity?

Oh, of course! It's the Aussie media. They're pretty much obliged to talk up the Wallabies, no matter how badly they play. I don't take them seriously at all. Especially since they're so blindingly biased against New Zealand that you can't find a sensible report on an All Blacks game. I mean, come the fuck on. Even Kiwi media outlets can write half-decent accounts of Wallabies games.

It's really hard to say who's the best in the Northern Hemisphere, at least for me, partly because I don't pay that much attention to the Six Nations. I generally expect Northern Hemisphere teams to be inferior to ours and I consider the Tri-Nations to be the World Cup in all but name. Wales won the Six Nations this year, but they've been wildly inconsistent. France actually aren't that bad; part of why they're so shit against Australia right now is because numerous first-choice players are locked into playing finals for the domestic French tournament, so they're stuck with players who really aren't that good and don't have a clue.

 

[Axver]

No, I'm sure you're pretty messy in the head over there, to some extent I can control what I'm writing pretty well when I'm more than tipsy. Further, you would like to keep the reputation of not misspelling stuff, so you're probably more devoted to making sure everything's in the right place than I am.

This is stunningly true. I've also always been very precise with my typing, so if I make an error, it seems only natural and normal to go back and correct it. I suppose it makes my drunkposting pretty disappointing, though.

So, after 2 hours:

Pinot gris 5 - 2 tawny port

And just to prove I'm drunk, I had to go back to my last post to see if I'd had 4 or 5 glasses of the pinot gris!

Also, this tawny port is sensational, it's so full of flavours. It's very evocative on the palate, full of vibrance and life and tasty, fruity sensations.

 

[Axver]

I should point out that the pinos gris has a higher alcohol content than the sauvignon blanc/semillon that I was drinking while drunkposting last week, when I made it to a scorecard of: sauvignon blanc/semillion 5 - 2 tawny port. The Sauv/semillion was 12.5%, while the pinot gris is 13.5%. I suppose that really isn't very significant a difference, though. But the pinot gris owns the sauvignon blanc/semillion in terms of quality, that's for sure. And I'm loving the port, which is 18% alcohol, so I suppose that's a bit better.

Just tried walking in a straight line and it didn't work out too well ...

 

[Axver]

This is kind of funny, in an informative way.

You're drunk? Hmm, I'm not sure about that, you seem to be able to remember the alphabet!

Well, I'm keeping going with the port. 5 pinot gris (I probably have 2-3 glasses of it left; like I said earlier, I pour large glasses) and now onto my 3rd tawny port. I don't care that Wolf Blass have sponsored the Wallabies; their tawny port is delicious and fruity, with raisiny hints and all kinds of a lovely aftertaste that entices me to go back for more and more.

Though I hate to think how much money I've spent on a single evening's boozing right now ...

 

[phillyfan26]

Morning.

First good night of sleep I've gotten in about two weeks.

 

[Axver]

Hey, if anybody would like to buy me some proper vintage port, I'd really love you and burn lots of U2 bootlegs for you.

And Bonnie, hurry up and reply to stuff! I'm drunk and need posts to respond to! EYKIW seems like too much effort right now; I'd have to focus and whatnot. Though, shit, I'm just drunk and used a semicolon. Goddamnit, I fail at drunkenness.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Believe it or not, I've had vegan pizza! One person I visited in the US was vegan and got out some pizza for dinner with me. I thought it was actually really good, bizarrely enough. Though not long after I left, she went to her doctor and he said she was so unhealthy that he literally forced her to stop being vegan.

No shit? What was on it? Come to think of it, I think I've had some before, too, at an organic pizza restaurant here. That wasn't too bad.

But oh Lord, the last part. That's brilliant, I'm sorry, but when it comes to Veganism, I'm almost as bad as some idiot that lives on McDonald's who thinks vegetarianism is idiotic.

Yeah, I'm pissed I lost contact with him. I still have his mobile number; might have to re-establish contact. I really enjoyed that Indian dinner, not to mention the food that said neighbour gave me while he was still my neighbour.

Yeah, I guess he still lives in Melbourne? Would be worth a try calling him. If you liked that meal, I may have mentioned an Indian place that I think was on Bourke street, it's busy all day and you can get a meal for about $7.00 or so. I can't remember the name of the place, I'm afraid (even though I went there a couple of times during the trip), but it wouldn't be too hard to miss with the cheap prices it boasts (and the amount of Indians that eat there, always a good sign as U-Wen said!), so if you're ever walking down Bourke and see something of this description, check it out.

Oh, of course! It's the Aussie media. They're pretty much obliged to talk up the Wallabies, no matter how badly they play. I don't take them seriously at all. Especially since they're so blindingly biased against New Zealand that you can't find a sensible report on an All Blacks game. I mean, come the fuck on. Even Kiwi media outlets can write half-decent accounts of Wallabies games.

It's probably not blatant bias as much as the fact that NZ is like only as big as a football field and they probably forgot about it. An innocent mistake.

It's really hard to say who's the best in the Northern Hemisphere, at least for me, partly because I don't pay that much attention to the Six Nations. I generally expect Northern Hemisphere teams to be inferior to ours and I consider the Tri-Nations to be the World Cup in all but name. Wales won the Six Nations this year, but they've been wildly inconsistent. France actually aren't that bad; part of why they're so shit against Australia right now is because numerous first-choice players are locked into playing finals for the domestic French tournament, so they're stuck with players who really aren't that good and don't have a clue.

Alright, thanks. I was wondering if France were any good, and that the game was just a bad example of them.

 

[The Sad Punk]

This wine-nerd-tipsy talk is hilarious, really. I wish I could have seen more of this for real! We did too much talking that night. Oh, I know... !

Just tried walking in a straight line and it didn't work out too well ...

Video this and put it on Youtube!

 

[Axver]

Morning.

First good night of sleep I've gotten in about two weeks.

Hey PFan! Good to hear!

A quality sleep is always made of awesomeness.

I feel like I should give up on correcting what typos I make, just to see if there are any lulz involved.

 

[phillyfan26]

What did I miss last night? I've missed that last ten and a half hours.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Sup Pfan?

Hey, if anybody would like to buy me some proper vintage port, I'd really love you and burn lots of U2 bootlegs for you.

And Bonnie, hurry up and reply to stuff! I'm drunk and need posts to respond to! EYKIW seems like too much effort right now; I'd have to focus and whatnot. Though, shit, I'm just drunk and used a semicolon. Goddamnit, I fail at drunkenness.

Next time I come over I'll bring some SA tawny over for you!

Dammit, man - I got caught off guard. Now there's some material for you.

 

[The Sad Punk]

I feel like I should give up on correcting what typos I make, just to see if there are any lulz involved.

Also turn off the light, if it's on. That contributed to how that horribly indecipherable post of mine came to be in the Brilliant superthread.

 

[Axver]

God, I'm laughing a lot right now. Nearly done with the 3rd glass of port. Remember I've also had 5 glasses of pinot gris! I'm sure the fact I'm reminding you of this signifies that I am drunk.

Wheeeee.

 

[Axver]

Also turn off the light, if it's on. That contributed to how that horribly indecipherable post of mine came to be in the Brilliant superthread.

G9dk U jeeo jkayguibgm Bi bbu

What I meant to say above is that god, I keep laughing, Bonnie. Not sure if that was due to drunkenness, laughing, or just having my fingers in the wrong place. Once I had a sip of port and repositioned my fingers, I was fine to type this paragraph.

 

[The Sad Punk]

God, I'm laughing a lot right now. Nearly done with the 3rd glass of port. Remember I've also had 5 glasses of pinot gris! I'm sure the fact I'm reminding you of this signifies that I am drunk.

Wheeeee.

Yeah, you've reminded us about three times now.

No, keep it up. I want to see a blind man get blind!

 

[Axver]

Now I'm just laughing at the bad typing in the first line of my last post!

 

[phillyfan26]

The laughing a lot thing is the key.

Normally you don't laugh much.

 

[The Sad Punk]

G9dk U jeeo jkayguibgm Bi bbu

What I meant to say above is that god, I keep laughing, Bonnie. Not sure if that was due to drunkenness, laughing, or just having my fingers in the wrong place. Once I had a sip of port and repositioned my fingers, I was fine to type this paragraph.

Recite the alphabet!

 

[phillyfan26]

Balance expensive china on your head!

On second thought...

 

[The Sad Punk]

The laughing a lot thing is the key.

Normally you don't laugh much.

I honestly saw him laugh for real. I had to rub my eyes and go huh. It was rather queer.

 

[phillyfan26]

Axver is a very serious person who takes being very serious very seriously.

 

[Axver]

No shit? What was on it? Come to think of it, I think I've had some before, too, at an organic pizza restaurant here. That wasn't too bad.

But oh Lord, the last part. That's brilliant, I'm sorry, but when it comes to Veganism, I'm almost as bad as some idiot that lives on McDonald's who thinks vegetarianism is idiotic.

Honestly, it LOOKED and TASTED like ordinary peneroni pizza. I thought she'd bought ordinary stuff for the rest of us and had her own vegan food until she told me that we'd all been eating vegan pizza.

And yeah, going vegan is going just a bit too far, you know? Cheese rocks the fuck on. Drunkenness told me to type that last sentence.

Yeah, I guess he still lives in Melbourne? Would be worth a try calling him. If you liked that meal, I may have mentioned an Indian place that I think was on Bourke street, it's busy all day and you can get a meal for about $7.00 or so. I can't remember the name of the place, I'm afraid (even though I went there a couple of times during the trip), but it wouldn't be too hard to miss with the cheap prices it boasts (and the amount of Indians that eat there, always a good sign as U-Wen said!), so if you're ever walking down Bourke and see something of this description, check it out.

Yeah, I think you sent me a text about that place - will have to find it. After our meal, I'd love some more Indian. It was very enjoyable. Honestly, my tastes and my food experiences aren't as broad as I'd like them to be. I wish I had tried more. Living on the Gold Coast for so long really did not help. Though one place in Mudgeeraba really introduced me to Italian and got me keen on Italian cuisine.

 

[The Sad Punk]

For comparison, I'm on my fifth beer.