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Old 01-16-2008, 10:32 AM   #256
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The Wonderful, Despicable Life of Roger Clemens
During a quarter century in the public eye, Roger Clemens never met a truth he couldn't bend or a person he couldn't blame for his own failings. A timeline.

By Sean Cunningham, Esquire Magazine



“Everybody kind of perceives me as being angry. It's not anger, it's motivation.” --Roger Clemens

It’s been an eventful off-season for Clemens. Blindsided by the Mitchell Report (by his account he received no advance notice of ex-trainer Brian McNamee’s steroid and HGH allegations, beyond McNamee notifying Clemens’ agents, Clemens’ agents notifying Clemens’ lawyer, Clemens’ lawyer notifying Clemens, and Clemens’ lawyer having two private investigators interrogate McNamee), he did what all falsely accused people do: go into seclusion for a couple weeks, then reemerge furious and confused. While the only one who will ever truly know whether Roger Clemens injected illegal drugs is his own ass, anyone who’s followed his career will concur that the Rocket is a lying bastard even if he didn't use steroids. The injections allegedly began in 1998, but the irrational rage, ever-changing stories, and general douchery were there from the start and continue to the present day.


1986
Roger Clemens wins his first Cy Young and the AL MVP, prompting Hall of Famer Hank Aaron to opine that pitchers should not be eligible for the MVP, since they don't play every day. Clemens thoughtfully responds, “I wish he were still playing. I'd probably crack his head open to show him how valuable I was.” While everyone attributes Boston's devastating collapse in the World Series to Bill Buckner's error in Game 6, few remember Clemens gave himself the hook in the game, telling manager John McNamara, “That’s all I can pitch.” Clemens later informs the press: “My blister was at a point where I couldn't finish off my slider. I didn't want to hang my slider and jeopardize the team. But I thought I did my job.”


1987
Roger ranks among the top ten in hit batters for the first time, plunking nine.


1988
McNamara gets fired. Suddenly, Clemens reverses his story, throwing his old skipper under the bus and saying he never wanted to leave Game 6 after all. This pattern of being "injured" in big games follows Clemens for the rest of his career, with Roger disappointing in a crucial postseason start and suddenly revealing he has a bad back/pulled hamstring/scurvy.


1990
“If someone met me on a game day, he wouldn't like me. The days in between, I'm the goodest guy you can find,” states Clemens. He proves the first part true when he takes the mound in Game 4 of the American League Championship Series against Oakland and lasts two innings before being ejected for threatening umpire Terry Cooney ("I'm gonna find out where you live and come get you this winter"). This is actually quite mild compared to what he said to Oakland pitcher and recovering alcoholic Bob Welch: “Have another beer. Be a man. Stop drinking milk.” Ah, Roger at his goodest.


1995
Roger reaches another milestone, leading the league in hit batsmen for the first time with 14.


1996
Insisting the only thing that would make him leave Boston is a desire to play closer to his Texas home, Clemens decides to join the Toronto Blue Jays. Despite this, Clemens graciously expresses great fondness for the Red Sox, noting his former teammates are “distraught” and “on their way out the door.”


1997
After four mediocre seasons, Clemens returns to form, winning his fourth Cy Young Award and ranking among the top ten in the league in hit batsmen for the seventh time.


1998
Clemens slumps again, starting the season with a mediocre 9-6 record and a 3.55 ERA. Meanwhile, Brian McNamee joins Toronto as the Blue Jay’s strength and conditioning coach. They begin to work together and Clemens goes 11-0 with a 1.71 ERA to close the season. Clemens will later sum up the contributions of his trainer by saying simply, “He’s one of a kind.”


1999
Clemens is traded to the New York Yankees and quickly realizes he loves his new team so much he announces he will only permit the Hall of Fame to induct him if allowed to enter as a Yankee: “I play 20 years, work my tail off, they're not going to tell me what hat I'm wearing. I promise you that. There might be a vacant seat there. I'll take my mother and we'll go to Palm Springs and invite all y'all and we'll have our own celebration.” Because Roger Clemens' mother + Palm Springs = Par-tay!


2000
An irate Clemens throws a piece of a broken bat at Mike Piazza during the World Series. Maintaining total innocence, Roger offers the perfectly plausible explanation that he just wanted to toss the bat “towards our on-deck circle, where our batboys were at.” Then he offers the equally perfectly plausible explanation that he “thought [the bat] was the ball.” Finally, he concludes, “To be honest with you, I didn't know if it was the bat or the ball,” putting the matter to rest forever.


2003
Clemens fulfills his dream of retiring as a Yankee, declaring in his farewell address, “The fans are second-to-none in New York” and when asked if there’s a scenario in which he’d return to baseball replies, “No scenario. I’m retired.”


2004
Turns out New York fans are actually second to the ones in Houston. “Any individual has the right to change his mind, and I don't know if I really did change my mind,” Clemens declares after changing his mind and joining the Astros. “There was so much good to doing this. With the overwhelming response since Andy [Pettite] signed here, that made all the difference. It's pretty much as simple as that.” (Also, a local radio station promises Clemens a Humvee.) To drive home Clemens’ loyalty to Houston, his agent adds, “He would not have played anywhere else.”


2006
Clemens brings some good old-fashioned American charm to the inaugural World Baseball Classic, observing, “None of the dry cleaners were open, they were all at the game, Japan and Korea. So we couldn't get any dry cleaning done out there, but I guess the neatest thing is that 50,000 of them were at Anaheim Stadium.” Japan winds up winning the WBC and Korea reaches the semifinals, while the un-dry-cleaned U.S. team is eliminated after Clemens loses to Mexico.


2007
Clemens decides the Yankees are second to none, after all, and rejoins the team he spurned three years earlier. He consoles Astro fans by musing, “I don't know who is mad down there. I poured my heart out there, just like Andy did. Their team is going to be fine.” For a bargain basement price of $18.7 million, Roger goes 6-6 with a 4.18 ERA -- yes, that is over $3.1 million per victory -- and lasts 2 and 1/3 innings with an 11.57 ERA in his lone playoff start.


2008
Roger appears with Mike Wallace on 60 Minutes to defend himself against the Mitchell Report charges. Insisting he would never go for the “quick fix” of illegal drugs -- on a completely unrelated note, he recalls a period when “I was eating Vioxx like it was Skittles” -- he is calm and collected as he addresses the allegations. Just kidding, he remains true to himself and goes apeshit: “I’m angry that that what I’ve done for the game of baseball and the personal, in my private life, what I’ve done that I don’t get the benefit of the doubt. The stuff that’s being said, it’s ridiculous. It’s hogwash for people to even assume this. 24, 25 years, Mike. You’d think I’d get an inch of respect. An inch.”
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Old 01-16-2008, 01:07 PM   #257
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What an asshat.
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Old 01-16-2008, 05:40 PM   #258
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Originally posted by Headache in a Suitcase
2000
An irate Clemens throws a piece of a broken bat at Mike Piazza during the World Series. Maintaining total innocence, Roger offers the perfectly plausible explanation that he just wanted to toss the bat “towards our on-deck circle, where our batboys were at.” Then he offers the equally perfectly plausible explanation that he “thought [the bat] was the ball.” Finally, he concludes, “To be honest with you, I didn't know if it was the bat or the ball,” putting the matter to rest forever.
That always reminded me of that time when Pierre Turgeon scored for NYI and while celebrating said goal got blindsided by the Caps' historically-dirty Dale Hunter. Hunter's explanation? "I didn't realize he'd scored, I was just finishing my check". Uh, yeah.
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Old 01-18-2008, 12:56 PM   #259
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"I sense that [the Mets] have got a deal if [Fernando] Martinez is in it," an industry official familiar with Minnesota's trade discussions said. Of course, the Mets package would have to include some mix of outfielder Carlos Gomez and Pitchers Deolis Guerra, Philip Humber and Kevin Mulvey. To date, the Mets have been reluctant to trade Martinez, since he is considered to have a high ceiling.
-Newsday
Fernando Martinez Double A stats from last year.

60 games, .271 average, 4 homers, 21 rbi's, .336 obp.

DOOOOOO IT.
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Old 01-21-2008, 09:40 PM   #260
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Headache! Old news, and I know you mentioned it before, but congrats on getting Angel Pagan from us.
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Old 01-21-2008, 10:18 PM   #261
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the world series can't be far behind.
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Old 01-23-2008, 08:29 AM   #262
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I'm almost at the point now where I hope Johan goes to the Mets. I'd love him on the Sox but it's a lot to give up, and the contract is going to be just stupid...but then again he's Johan Santana so I definitely want him if the alternative is the Yankees getting him. So best-case he goes to the Mets...
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Old 01-23-2008, 02:04 PM   #263
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Meet the Mets: Former darkhorse takes the lead in Santana derby

Jon Heyman, CNNSI.com

Once written off as an extreme long shot in the long-running Johan Santana drama, the Mets may actually be the favorite now. At the very least, there are indications now that they are engaging in more regular dialogue with the Twins in recent days than either the Red Sox or Yankees. And Mets general manager Omar Minaya, who loves a big deal but hasn't made one since the winter before last, has told some people in the business, "We have a shot.''

Minaya declined to comment when I reached him on Tuesday. But there are some definite signs that the Twins may be warming to the idea of taking a package of projects and prospects with high ceilings while not insisting on much in the way of major-league help. Which, if true, would give the Mets a real shot.

When Minnesota began shopping Santana in early December, I was told the Twins would have to get Jose Reyes back in a Mets deal, a non-starter for the Mets who understandably consider Reyes a cornerstone player and aren't about to deal him for a pitcher -- even a great pitcher -- who's a year away from free agency and would require an extension at $22-to-$25 million. But in recent weeks I was told that there was indeed a Mets deal to be made, even without Reyes or David Wright or someone of that ilk. That the Twins and Mets continue to talk seems to support that assertion.

But for the Mets to actually land Santana it will take at least two significant hurdles being cleared, and that doesn't include having to negotiate a long-term contract with him. First, the Mets have to agree to send over a package of many real prospects, probably five or more, which would considerably deplete their minor-league resources. Second, the Red Sox and Yankees, who are both better stocked at the upper reaches of the minors, have to continue to take a less then enthusiastic approach in the competition to add one of the game's top two pitchers.

Neither the Red Sox, who have seemed consistently lukewarm in this derby, nor the Yankees, who have run hot and cold, has been as aggressive as one might expect considering their longstanding fight over players big and small. At this point, it appears either might simply be happy not to see Santana go to the other.

The Red Sox have stuck for weeks with their offer of two separate deals, one led by young lefthander Jon Lester and the other by young center fielder Jacoby Ellsbury. Boston also appears willing to include three more prospects with each, including decent young players such as infielder Jed Lowrie and pitchers Justin Masterson and Michael Bowden. However, Boston has been consistent in refusing to combine both Lester and Ellsbury in the same package. Red Sox GM Theo Epstein has seemed very comfortable with his offers and has given the impression that he could live without Santana, understandable in that the world champions may already have baseball's best rotation without him.

The Yankees remain the wild card. GM Brian Cashman has made the rejuvenation of the team's farm system his calling card and is said to be against trading even one top-flight young pitcher, such as Phil Hughes. But newly-empowered general partner Hank Steinbrenner is said by insiders to be much more willing to do what it takes in terms of prospects and dollars to land Santana.

However, Steinbrenner's younger son, the less free-wheeling and more buttoned-down Hal, who's said to be in charge of the purse strings, is believed to be siding with Cashman's call to proceed cautiously. Club insiders could see the two sons eventually butting heads over a major expenditure such as this one, but with Cashman strongly siding with the junior Steinbrenner they aren't sure whether Hank will press the issue over Santana. Ultimately, unless Hank is willing to fight his brother and a general manager he's hoping to retain beyond 2008 (Cashman has not yet discussed an extension, preferring instead to see how things play out in the new hierarchy), the Yankees are unlikely to accede to the Twins' requests to go beyond Hughes, outfielder Melky Cabrera, pitching prospect Jeffrey Marquez and a lesser prospect.

With the Red Sox and Yankees less aggressive than one might expect, there still may be an opening for the Mets, who need Santana much more than the other two teams. For them, Santana would be a perfect fit, the No. 1 pitcher to go in front of Pedro Martinez and John Maine and make the fans and players focus on something other than the team's dreadful finish to the 2007 season.

The current prospects on the table appear to be outfielder Carlos Gomez plus pitchers Deolis Guerra, Phil Humber and Kevin Mulvey. None of these players is likely to make the immediate impact of a Lester, an Ellsbury or a Hughes. But some scouts believe the overall talent will be greater in a Mets package, and that they should work it out with the team from Queens.

It appears the Twins may favor Gomez over Fernando Martinez because Gomez can play center field, a need since the defection of fan favorite Torii Hunter to the Angels, and may actually like Humber as much as the Mets' more ballyhooed pitching prospect Mike Pelfrey, whose stock waned last season. In any case the Twins aren't as desperate for immediate pitching help as some might imagine, since they are well-stocked with minor-league arms.

Some Mets officials have an impression that they could probably have Santana if they simply added Martinez to the mix, but one person familiar with the Mets thinking said he'd be surprised if the Mets agreed to do that, which would leave their minor-league system practically barren. Which explains why there still isn't a deal.

In any case, it is understandable that the Twins are taking their time. They know what they can get from the Red Sox, who don't appear to have set a deadline, and probably remain hopeful that Hank Steinbrenner overrules both his brother and Cashman and adds top young pitcher Ian Kennedy to the mix. "Kennedy's as good as Hughes,'' opines one scout, "They shouldn't do that.'' Still, some are surprised at the restraint being showed by the Yankees, considering the threat of Santana going to the rival Red Sox. "If Boston gets Santana, they lock up the division the next three or four years,'' one competing executive says.

Minnesota's first-year general manager Bill Smith is probably one of those surprised that the Yankees and Red Sox are showing a willingness to live without Santana, a two-time Cy Young winner who's healthy and will turn 29 next month. Smith is apparently having a hard time extracting fair value for Santana for a variety of reasons, most notably Santana's status as a player who's only one year from free agency, his ability to veto any trade and his expected price tag, which severely limits the field to all but the biggest markets (he is believed to be seeking a six-year deal for close to $25 million annually).

However, time may start to work against Smith. Other execs could see Santana's agents, Peter and Ed Greenberg of New York, telling the Twins that their client will invoke his no-trade clause once the season starts since he'd be less than a year away from the riches of free agency and would want to concentrate on his craft.

One other hurdle with the Mets could be the length of the contract. While the Red Sox and Yankees may be more amenable to a six-year deal for a superstar such as Santana, one person familiar with the Mets' thinking said he believed the team would stick to its policy of not going beyond five years for any player. Santana's rejection of the Twins' four-year, $80-million contract offer is what led to his being put on the trading block in the first place. However, the Mets apparently believe the right "structure'' (i.e. a deal for close to his asking price) could convince him to come east. If they can agree to compensation with Minnesota, most believe they'll work things out, since the Greenberg brothers also represent Reyes and maintain an excellent relationship with the Mets.

Minnesota's Smith has a lot of heat on him now in the frigid Twin Cities. A consistently affable fellow, Smith was asked on Tuesday for a summary of where things stand. "Santana's still a Twin," he said. Then he politely declined to elaborate.
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Old 01-23-2008, 02:58 PM   #264
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the new cubs advertisement for the fuck you dome.



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The Rising Sun Flag is the military flag of Japan. It had been used as the ensign of the Imperial Japanese Navy and the war flag of the Imperial Japanese Army until the end of World War II. It is also presently the ensign of the Japan Maritime Self-Defense Force and the war flag of the Japan Ground Self-Defense Force.

This flag is often considered offensive in countries which were victims of Japanese hostility, particularly China, Australia, United States and the Koreas, where it is seen as alarming, nationalistic and hostile. (Wikipedia)
to offending half the globe
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Old 01-23-2008, 05:00 PM   #265
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the new cubs advertisement for the fuck you dome.





to offending half the globe

You can't offend anyone in the "Friendly Confines". I once wore a KKK suit to Wrigley and was embraced by the entire African-American community. Such is the mystical power of that great place.
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Old 01-23-2008, 06:43 PM   #266
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i that reply
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Old 01-23-2008, 06:46 PM   #267
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Big Grin "beat the Mets, Beat the Mets, step right up and beat the Mets"

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You can't offend anyone in the "Friendly Confines". I once wore a KKK suit to Wrigley and was embraced by the entire African-American community. Such is the mystical power of that great place.
We will let Headache go on this one....his source is Wikipedia and may not be offended by the rising sun used in the Cubs ad, but IS offended by this logo that could be seen as "similar to the rising sun" :

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Old 01-23-2008, 06:47 PM   #268
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Big Grin

..........AND, I am liking Johan to the Mets!
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Old 01-23-2008, 06:49 PM   #269
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my source was deadspin.com, their source was wikipedia

and i am too :Pray:
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Old 01-23-2008, 06:52 PM   #270
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and i am too :Pray:
At this point, I feel the best the Twins can get for Johan is what the Mets have to offer (players with potential future impact). And, he will be in the N.L. where he will not play against the Twins (often).
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