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Old 12-09-2007, 08:45 AM   #1
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The dangers of playing Nintendo Wii (or anything, really) with Frank the Monkey

Oh how shall I count the ways? Let me ennumerate them.

For one thing, it's not Nintendo Wii when Frank is around, it's Nintendo Wee. As in, you won't stop pissing. And being pissed upon.

Frank the Monkey is getting me a colostomy bag for Christmas.

It would seem an odd gift except that after he's finished making shit sausages out of approximately 30 metres of my large intestine, it will be sort of essential. That is, if I don't want to shit into my stomach. Hard choice, I know, I'm still deliberating to be honest.

Anyway, Nintendo Wee. It's not much fun I can tell you. You won't stop screaming either.

There are no rules, there is no object. There is just Frank, and pissing. Pissing.

Pus-filled balloons, guys.
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Old 12-09-2007, 01:06 PM   #2
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what does he actually DO with the shit sausages?

does he force you to eat them, or does he host a bbq for the neighbours, effectively conning them into thinking he's just a regular friendly monkey?
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Old 12-09-2007, 02:17 PM   #3
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Frank is Bavarian by bastard birth. Naturally, he serves all his homemade shit sausages at his annual Octoberfaeces festival.

Mmm... wienershitzel.
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Old 12-09-2007, 04:16 PM   #4
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pinball wizard, everyone!

pinball wizard!

*applause
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Old 12-10-2007, 01:49 AM   #5
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I'm just gonna go ahead and RSS Feed™ myself all the birthday threads from Lemonade Stand. How can people starve in a world with such an abundance of on-demand birthday threads?

They have no bread?! Well then, let them eat thread cake!

That's right, Frank.

It's Feeding™ time again.

~Marie Internette
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Old 12-10-2007, 03:50 AM   #6
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I'm gonna staple the world to my face, guys.

With a nail gun.
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Old 12-10-2007, 04:05 AM   #7
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Anyone else over it, gang?

I am.

Bring back jick
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Old 12-10-2007, 08:20 AM   #8
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I'm over you, COBL_4.

Bring back Jick? 'J, the King of POP' as we knew him back in the glorious days of the whatever board?

Why? What? When?

How?

Where am I?
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Old 12-10-2007, 02:15 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pinball Wizard
I'm just gonna go ahead and RSS Feed™ myself all the birthday threads from Lemonade Stand. How can people starve in a world with such an abundance of on-demand birthday threads?

They have no bread?! Well then, let them eat thread cake!

That's right, Frank.

It's Feeding™ time again.

~Marie Internette
are you saying there aren't enough birthday threads, cujo (guys)?
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Old 12-11-2007, 03:10 AM   #10
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Just sayin. Eight replies. No one cares??
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Old 12-11-2007, 06:42 AM   #11
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noone cares about what, "COBL_04"?
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Old 12-11-2007, 07:27 AM   #12
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It's time for another Frank the Monkey thread, guys

Frank teaches us that we have nothing to fear but fear itself, guys.

Unfortunately, guys, fear is a rapacious, gnawing, merciless beast that will hollow out your insides with the vicious relentlessness of battery acid.

Fear can and will literally turn you to stone on the spot, guys.

I shat my pants this morning, rather than have to venture into the bathroom where I knew perfectly damn well that Frank was hanging out for the night/morning.

I would honestly rather piss in the kitchen sink than have to deal with Frank, in the bathroom. And I did.

The trouble is, one of Frank's fingers is now poking out of the kitchen plughole. Now I have to go to the thai takeaway down the road if I want to use the 'toilete'.

Since Frank replaced my bowels with the hose from a gas station petrol bowser, life has gotten kind of messy for me.

I've lost the ability to feel fear, except when Frank is around. I only feel rage, except when Frank is around, and then I feel fear.

Stone cold fear.
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Old 12-11-2007, 07:31 AM   #13
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I think we should totally have more birthday threads. Fake birthday threads, if necessary.
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Old 12-11-2007, 09:36 AM   #14
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Kieran teaches us that we have nothing to fear but boredom, guys.

Unfortunately, guys, boredom is a rapacious, gnawing, merciless beast that will hollow out your insides with the vicious relentlessness of battery acid.

Boredom can and will literally turn you to stone on the spot, guys.

Stone cold boredom.
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Old 12-11-2007, 09:49 AM   #15
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are you really Kieran????
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