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Old 12-17-2001, 12:32 AM   #1
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Long Distance Relationships

They suck...

Started dating my girlfriend in December of 1997. After graduating college in May of '99, our relationshop evolved into a long distance one as I was stuck in grad school in Indiana and she worked on a schooner (no phone, email, nothing)off the coast of Maine. She eventually (is graduating this May) went to Law school in upstate NY while I returned to NYC to work. So, we've been doing the every other weekend thing for a while now which is alot better than when she was at sea. I didn't see her for 3 months during the schooner time.

Now, her job prospects are not as strong (damn economy) and she might take a job upstate rather than NYC or Boston. Not all that bad, but I'm contracted to work through August of 2003 and my firm doesn't have an office where she's probably going to be working.....so the distance is going to go on and on....

So, anyone else have a long distance story?

CK
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Old 12-17-2001, 12:46 AM   #2
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Not a very long story, but here goes. My girlfriend of over year and I have been communicating 1.5 to 2 hours away while she's back home and I'm at college. It's made us stronger. Is the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder"? Sounds off. Hope things look up for you!

[This message has been edited by wannabe (edited 12-16-2001).]
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Old 12-17-2001, 01:13 AM   #3
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My fiance lives 650 miles away. You can make it work, if you really try!

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Old 12-17-2001, 01:31 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bonochick:
My fiance lives 650 miles away. You can make it work, if you really try!

Why are you apart?

CK

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Old 12-17-2001, 01:46 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by TheU2:
Why are you apart?

CK

We met on the Internet before meetin' in real life. We have to/want to finish school before one of us can move.


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Old 12-17-2001, 01:48 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bonochick:
We met on the Internet before meetin' in real life. We have to/want to finish school before one of us can move.


Interesting.....

I don't know if I could do a long distance thing without dating for a while. I was pretty much living with her prior to our long distance shindig.

CK
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Old 12-17-2001, 12:26 PM   #7
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I was in one for almost 2 years. Things worked out pretty well, we saw each other as frequently as possible for being so far away. Eventually the stress of it (among other relationship breakers-i.e., jealousy, immaturity, etc.) made us break up, but it was well worth it to me. Not sure if I would do it again, unless the person was in driving distance, but then again who knows?

Good luck to everyone here in a LDR now!

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Old 12-17-2001, 12:35 PM   #8
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They are difficult but I think it depends onwhere you are in your life whether or not it will work?

There are two avenues to take:

1) Absence makes the heart grow fonder

2) Out of Sight, out of mind.

I don't know if I could do it again. At first it was okay but relationships are hard enough without having that added stress.

Good luck. I wish you and the others with LDR the very best!!!

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Old 12-17-2001, 01:25 PM   #9
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Here's a thought for you:

If you really, really love this person and want to spend the rest of your life with that person...

Being apart for a few years or so is worth being able to spend the rest of your many, many years after that with each other.

Or you can settle for somebody else just for the sake of that person being closer.



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Old 12-17-2001, 02:24 PM   #10
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Good luck TheU2! When there's a will there's a way. To have lasted this long in a relationsahip like yours deserves props. There's not a whole lot of us out there that could endure what you've already endured. Love knows no bounds - even the physical bounds that keep two lovers apart.

My brother and his wife were high school sweethearts. When it came time for them to part ways and go to college it was a very hard 4 years. They broke up a few times, but the break ups were short lived. Even when they weren't demographically convenient they still couldn't 'live' without each other. They visited each other on holidays and my brother would make the long long drive to her college every 3 or 4 months. It was tough but they stuck it out. Once college was over my brother's girlfriend made the sacrifice to not pursue her career just yet, but to allow my brother to pursue his work endeavors. It was hard for her because she is a very business oriented and career driven kind of gal - but she and my brother didn't want to be seperated ever again. Eventually, after 7 years of dating, they married. As of today they have been married for 10 years and have two gorgeous children. My brother is successful in his career and so is my sis-in-law. The long distance relationship they endured all those years ago is so small in the grand scale of things.

Sure, their story may be one in a few but when there's two people in love it's the glue that keeps hope alive. Love conquers all, and I'm sure you'll be just fine and one day... sooner than you think, the day will come when the long distance relationship will be a thing of the past.

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Old 12-17-2001, 02:52 PM   #11
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I heard this from someone:

"I have two theories about LDRs. First, the time spent apart should not exceed the time spent together. Second, they suck."
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Old 12-18-2001, 07:47 AM   #12
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long distance relationships suck. you don't realy know a person until u finally meet em' face to face and get to know the real person. plus, people who go online looking for love are sad to begin with as far as i'm concerned.....more often than not it doesn't work out for the better.

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Old 12-18-2001, 09:51 AM   #13
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I had...until yesterday

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Old 12-18-2001, 11:34 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by PopDreamBeliever:
plus, people who go online looking for love are sad to begin with as far as i'm concerned.

You know...people aren't always looking for love when they do find it.

I wasn't planning on meeting my sweetheart online...it just happened that way.

I think that is a horrible generalization as well.


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Old 12-18-2001, 05:07 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally posted by PopDreamBeliever:
long distance relationships suck. you don't realy know a person until u finally meet em' face to face and get to know the real person. plus, people who go online looking for love are sad to begin with as far as i'm concerned.....more often than not it doesn't work out for the better.

That's very rude...you can't judge a situation unless you have been in it.
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