mad1
ONE love, blood, life
But yes, apparantly they are, some from America 
*An elderly woman spent a leisurely shopping at the mall. Upon return to her vehicle, she found four strange males sitting in her car. Frightened, the woman dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun. She told the men that if they did not get out of the car, she would shoot. The four men ran off quickly, whereupon the lady got into the car. Her key, however, would not fit. The woman realized that her car was the identical one parked a few spaces down. She drove to the police department and reported the story. The officer on duty laughed hysterically and pointed to the other end of the counter where four pale men had reported a hijacking by a mean old lady; no charges were filed..
*A woman reported her missing car to the police and mentioned that the car had a phone. The police officer taking the report called the phone. He told the man that answered that he had read the ad in the paper and was interested in buying the car. The two arranged to meet and the thief was promptly arrested.
*Charged with speeding, this Gainesville man made his appearance in court. Though he was reportedly going ninety in a twenty-five zone, the man plead innocent. He told the judge that he had taken a laxative and was thus in a rush to get home.
*While grocery shopping at the local Kroger, a man's car was stolen. Dumbfounded, the man stood on the curb trying to figure out what to do. His answer came just a few minutes later when the larcenist approached the man in the newly stolen vehicle and asked for directions..
*Two men broke into a local Radio Shack and stole, among other items, several camcorders. The men had a fine time goofing off for the cameras and watching themselves on the television. They did not realize, however, that one of the cameras was also the store security camera. They caught their whole burglary on tape.
*A man walked into the corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the money from the cash register. After the cashier put the money in the bag as instructed, the man demanded the bottle of Scotch he saw behind the counter. The cashier refused to hand over the Scotch because he did not believe the man was 21. The robber swore he was, but still the clerk refused. Finally, the robber handed over his ID and proved that he was indeed twenty-one. As soon as he left, the cashier called and gave the police the name and address of the man who had just robbed the store. The suspect was arrested two hours later.
*A man went into a convenience store and bought a bottle of beer. Standing at the counter to pay, he tells the clerk to give him all the money she has. Standing next to him was a uniformed police officer
*Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a mechanic found eighteen packages of marijuana packed in the engine compartment of the car. The woman, who had taken her car in for an oil change said that she did not realize he would have to lift the hood to get the job done.
*Two men tried to pull the front off an ATM by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the panel off the machine, however, they pulled the bumper off the truck. Scared, they left the scene of the crime. Their bumper, along with their license plate was still attached to the ATM.
LOL!!!!!!!!!
*An elderly woman spent a leisurely shopping at the mall. Upon return to her vehicle, she found four strange males sitting in her car. Frightened, the woman dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun. She told the men that if they did not get out of the car, she would shoot. The four men ran off quickly, whereupon the lady got into the car. Her key, however, would not fit. The woman realized that her car was the identical one parked a few spaces down. She drove to the police department and reported the story. The officer on duty laughed hysterically and pointed to the other end of the counter where four pale men had reported a hijacking by a mean old lady; no charges were filed..
*A woman reported her missing car to the police and mentioned that the car had a phone. The police officer taking the report called the phone. He told the man that answered that he had read the ad in the paper and was interested in buying the car. The two arranged to meet and the thief was promptly arrested.
*Charged with speeding, this Gainesville man made his appearance in court. Though he was reportedly going ninety in a twenty-five zone, the man plead innocent. He told the judge that he had taken a laxative and was thus in a rush to get home.
*While grocery shopping at the local Kroger, a man's car was stolen. Dumbfounded, the man stood on the curb trying to figure out what to do. His answer came just a few minutes later when the larcenist approached the man in the newly stolen vehicle and asked for directions..
*Two men broke into a local Radio Shack and stole, among other items, several camcorders. The men had a fine time goofing off for the cameras and watching themselves on the television. They did not realize, however, that one of the cameras was also the store security camera. They caught their whole burglary on tape.
*A man walked into the corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the money from the cash register. After the cashier put the money in the bag as instructed, the man demanded the bottle of Scotch he saw behind the counter. The cashier refused to hand over the Scotch because he did not believe the man was 21. The robber swore he was, but still the clerk refused. Finally, the robber handed over his ID and proved that he was indeed twenty-one. As soon as he left, the cashier called and gave the police the name and address of the man who had just robbed the store. The suspect was arrested two hours later.
*A man went into a convenience store and bought a bottle of beer. Standing at the counter to pay, he tells the clerk to give him all the money she has. Standing next to him was a uniformed police officer
*Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a mechanic found eighteen packages of marijuana packed in the engine compartment of the car. The woman, who had taken her car in for an oil change said that she did not realize he would have to lift the hood to get the job done.
*Two men tried to pull the front off an ATM by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the panel off the machine, however, they pulled the bumper off the truck. Scared, they left the scene of the crime. Their bumper, along with their license plate was still attached to the ATM.
LOL!!!!!!!!!
