Let's Hate On Dane Cook

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Headache in a Suitcase

Headache in a Suitcase

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POP LIFE: THE JOKE'S ON US

How can any comedian get as famous as Dane Cook has with no jokes?

ROB SHEFFIELD - ROLLING STONE

Taylor Dayne. Cookie Monster. The Great Dane next door. Cooke City, Montana. A prune Danish. The Bugs Bunny cartoon that goes, "Cook! Where's my hasenpfeffer?" This is just a partial list of things that are funnier than Dane Cook, but let's stop here or we could go on all day, like one of Dane's monologues. Yeah, we get it: the world's hottest comedian, a success story, the MySpace generation, blah to the blah, but where are the fucking jokes? Dane, did you bring any jokes at all? Or did you just figure you'd think of some after you got famous? His success is his whole story, with his hit album Retaliation, his HBO special Vicious Circle, his Jessica Simpson comedy Employee of the Month. But when does the funny start? How can any comedian get this famous with no jokes? It's like he's a lovable character Will Ferrell made up for an upcoming media-prank comedy, Funnyguy: The Legend of Dane Cook.
Tune in to Dane, and you'll hear old "ya ever notice?" gags you thought would never walk again. You will learn about airports, driving, the ways women are different from men (they cry!), and how people call you "pal" when they're not your pal. "Why are we still requesting people say 'cheese'?" Dane asks. "Was there a time in history when like, photography and cheese were like, the shit?" The best line on Retaliation goes, "He was hit by a Dodge, which I found funny and ironic." I can't wait to figure out which old Emo Philips record that one comes from.

Other comics resent him, not so much for success as for biting routines from Louis C.K. and still not being funny. Dane could be reading aloud from Dave Berg's "The Lighter Side of" in Mad magazine, or he could be Animal House if you thought Neidermeyer was the funny one, but it doesn't matter. Either way, he's huge. Go to his Web site, where he earned his rep as a marketing whiz, and you notice there's no comedy, just essays about how hard he's worked. "Great news!!!" he writes. "We already made back our entire budget and now the movie is making a profit. This is great for me and my cast. It has sent a message that I can open a film up against huge competition." Dane, did you wonder if we noticed Employee of the Month was the assest movie Andy Dick's ever been in, and that includes The Hebrew Hammer? We did! In his Danecasts, he doesn't crack jokes; he listens to Coldplay, replies to his New Friend Requests and urges us to go see Employee of the Month. "Thank you for wanting to check in with me," he muses. "Five million people downloading the Danecast, and let me tell you, it's just gonna get better." You're welcome! So -- heard any good jokes lately?
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:love:

finally... someone has put my hatred for the man's "comedy" into words.
 
How can George Carlin be heralded as one of the century's greatest comedians (A man whose repatoire is completely and utterly devoid of anything even resembling a coherent joke), while people simple can't stand Dane Cook's success (A fresh comedian with a genuinely fresh comedic style).
 
I've caught bits and peices of Dane Cook's stuff, but I've never felt the urge to laugh. It always seems like the punch line is coming, and then he changes his mind and returns to whining.

George Carlin points out hypocrisy and irony, not so much as tells "jokes". Like Lenny Bruce or Andy Kaufman or (time will tell) Sacha Baron Cohen.
 
dane cook to me is a poor (very poor... like welfare poor) man's robin williams.

robin williams is hilarious in his demeanor, his delivery, his style... but when it all comes down to it, if you ignore all that and listen to just his jokes, he's really not that funny. but he's so outrageous that he forces you to laugh.

dane cook perhaps is trying to accomplish the same things... only problem is dane cook is no robin williams.

he's a guy in his mid 30s who caters to humor of the late teen/early 20's set... fart/poop/sex jokes, most of which are rehashed jokes from previous comedians, and none of which are groundbreaking in any way.

to compare him to george carlin, who's material was so risky and groundbreaking that it was the subject of a supreme court case for pete's sake, is just plain stupid.
 
UberBeaver said:
I've caught bits and peices of Dane Cook's stuff, but I've never felt the urge to laugh. It always seems like the punch line is coming, and then he changes his mind and returns to whining.

George Carlin points out hypocrisy and irony, not so much as tells "jokes". Like Lenny Bruce or Andy Kaufman or (time will tell) Sacha Baron Cohen.
Click to expand...

:up: the kaufman/baron cohen comparison is a mighty good one.
 
UberBeaver said:
I've caught bits and peices of Dane Cook's stuff, but I've never felt the urge to laugh. It always seems like the punch line is coming, and then he changes his mind and returns to whining.
Click to expand...

:up:

Nice to know I'm not the only one around here who finds him annoying!
 
My wife and I were watching a commercial of his yesterday, and it cuts to him saying something, and then just cuts away, no joke, or a least nothing that sounded like a joke. So she says, "That's it?" And I said, "Yeah. Pretty much." And she said, "Wow. He sucks", and that basically sums the whole Dane Cook experience up for me. :)
 
LarryMullen's_POPAngel said:
I used to love the guy, but I caught him on tv a few times since the last time I saw him live (August 2005) and he's just not funny anymore. :huh:
Click to expand...

Lancemc said:
How can George Carlin be heralded as one of the century's greatest comedians (A man whose repatoire is completely and utterly devoid of anything even resembling a coherent joke)...
Click to expand...

:up: :up: :up:

Dane was a lot better when he was just a 30 minute Comedy Central special and Harmful if Swallowed. Somewhere along the way he sold his soul to the devil.

He's still hot though. :sexywink:
 
I am defintely not a fan of Dane Cook. I don't find him funny either.

I don't like Ben Stiller either, there I said it.
 
Headache in a Suitcase said:
dane cook to me is a poor (very poor... like welfare poor) man's robin williams.

robin williams is hilarious in his demeanor, his delivery, his style... but when it all comes down to it, if you ignore all that and listen to just his jokes, he's really not that funny. but he's so outrageous that he forces you to laugh.

dane cook perhaps is trying to accomplish the same things... only problem is dane cook is no robin williams.

he's a guy in his mid 30s who caters to humor of the late teen/early 20's set... fart/poop/sex jokes, most of which are rehashed jokes from previous comedians, and none of which are groundbreaking in any way.

to compare him to george carlin, who's material was so risky and groundbreaking that it was the subject of a supreme court case for pete's sake, is just plain stupid.
Click to expand...

I think I love you. :heart: :love: :applaud:
 
Dane Cook's lowest-common denominator schlep really bores the shit out of me. It's unfortunate that he sucks balls, because many of my uni classmates enjoy his stuff.

Give me Ricky Gervais any day.
 
LarryMullen's_POPAngel said:

I think his face is melting. It looks different. :hmm:
Click to expand...

The devil probably has something to do with that.
He'll never look as good as he did in that black tank on Comedy Central, I'll agree on that. :drool:
 
Canadiens1160 said:
Dane Cook's lowest-common denominator schlep really bores the shit out of me. It's unfortunate that he sucks balls, because many of my uni classmates enjoy his stuff.

Give me Ricky Gervais any day.
Click to expand...

Gervais :up:

Someone please throw Dane Cook, Larry the Cable Guy, and Gilbert Godfried in a plane with snakes, please.
 
$100 says that when the plane lands, Godfried is the only one left alive.
He would have literally annoyed everyone to death.
 
UberBeaver said:
Dane Cook's mama's so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
Click to expand...

I know you didn't know this (probably), but Dane Cook's mother died very recently from a long illness. :(
 
PlaTheGreat said:
$100 says that when the plane lands, Godfried is the only one left alive.
He would have literally annoyed everyone to death.
Click to expand...

ba-zing.
 
His HBO special Vicious Circle was horrid.

Bomb on Leno, Comedy Central, other 'clean' shows, fine.
Suck balls on HBO and there is no excuse.
 
Last edited:
Roseanne Barr was just on Larry King...she's hillarious still.
"It's totally not Foley's fault. He got involved early on as an alter boy. He just got SUCKED in."
 
PlaTheGreat said:
$100 says that when the plane lands, Godfried is the only one left alive.
He would have literally annoyed everyone to death.
Click to expand...

Speaking of Godfried and death, did you catch him on VH1's Celebrity Paranormal Project? :lol:
 
ThoraSEB said:


:up:

Nice to know I'm not the only one around here who finds him annoying!
Click to expand...


ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!


I CAN'T STAND DANE COOK!



HE SUCKS!

ok, I feel better now.

thank you Headache for the thread.
 
This guy pretty much defines the word idiot. His routine is lame and his suicide jokes made earlier in the year on SNL were beyond inappropriate.

Someone in another thread earlier posted a cat smelling a turd - that would be Dane Cook.


:down:
 
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