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Old 12-24-2004, 04:53 PM   #1
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i'm gonna scream at you until your covered in angry voice

furious.

absolutely. furious.

wendel came over again today, and, yes, it was one of his famous unanounced stops that have my family up in arms every time we see his car pull onto the driveway.

now don't get me wrong - wendel's a great guy. it's just that everytime he stops by, it's his idea that we all take our shirts off and sit by the fire for an hour or two.

as you can imagine, it's extremely awkward around the family.

naturally, we decline, but you really have no idea how hard he persists before he finally gets the idea that we're actually serious when we say "no wendel! our shirts stay on when we're at the there then house now!"

this is how it starts every single time. he doesn't even have a chance to take off his shoes before people are screaming in violent protest of his filthy games.

so when he does finally get around to coming in, it's of no comfort when he decides to piss in the corner of the living room.

"wendel, you know our toilet's in the washroom, right?"

"noone's ever made me do anything i don't wanna do."

"no, and i know, that's fine wendel, but the problem here is that your urine smells horrible and it's taken until now to get the smell out from the last time you relieved yourself."

"shiIIIIiiEEEET!!! what a prickly pete you are! i'm already done anyway, what's in the fridge..."

now you're probably asking yourself, 'how do you know who wendel is? is he a relative? a family friend?'

truth is, he's neither. we have NO idea who he is. oh, believe me, we've asked. it's just that everytime we inquire, he responds with some bullshit tale of 'heeey, ya you know meeeee, geeee!'

it just doesn't make any sense. none of it.

so anyway, after he's found what he's been looking for in the fridge, he makes his way over to the couch where he promptly sits, and unbuttons his pants.

the good news is he usually gets the urge to leave the house after sitting there for about two or three days. even better is that he only stops by a few times a year these days, as opposed to the weekly drop-by's he made himself famous for back a number of years ago.

so, as i wrap this story up, i'd like to extend my own personal wishes of a merry christmas to at least some of you. the rest, well, you're the proverbial 'wendel' of my life. you probably have no idea how awkward you've made things for me and my family, but that's ok. i've probably done somethings that don't make a whole lot of sense either.
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Old 12-24-2004, 04:55 PM   #2
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and AGAIN, i screw up the title of this thread.

you're not your. WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SCREW UP DEATHBEAR?!!?! HUH?!?!?!? DOES MR. FINGER POKE YOU IN THE EYE? DOES HE? DOES HE GATHER HIS FINGER FRIENDS, PICK UP A KNIFE AND ATTACK YOUR FACE?!!?!?!! DOES HE?!?!?!!?

WHY AREN'T YOU ANSWERING ME?!!?!?!?!?
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Old 12-24-2004, 05:10 PM   #3
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Old 12-24-2004, 05:15 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by MissVelvetDress_75
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Old 12-24-2004, 05:17 PM   #5
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question for you db:

do you post on alt.music.tragically-hip under the username "Whorella Mundane"?
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Old 12-24-2004, 05:20 PM   #6
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That Wendel is such a character!

Oh and merry fucking Christmas to you too, bear.
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Old 12-24-2004, 05:47 PM   #7
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no dave, i don't, but that's a fantastic handle if i've ever heard one.

calluna, i have a feeling wendel is coming to seattle in the near future.
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Old 12-24-2004, 06:36 PM   #8
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Wendel Clark?
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Old 12-24-2004, 08:14 PM   #9
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no, this guy doesn't have a last name.

we've asked, but he always just pretends to not hear the question.
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Old 12-24-2004, 08:27 PM   #10
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Malkavians are fun.
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Old 12-24-2004, 08:54 PM   #11
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i'm not sure people realize the true extent of the danger wendel represents here.
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Old 12-24-2004, 10:53 PM   #12
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so what if i peed on your carpet? Deal with it bitches .
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Old 12-24-2004, 11:04 PM   #13
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i dont have to deal with anything i don't want to.
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Old 12-24-2004, 11:13 PM   #14
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let's drink away our sorrows.









or talk about bono OMGZ LOL~!
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Old 12-24-2004, 11:14 PM   #15
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hey you're drinking too?


good times.

let's talk about girls.
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