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Old 07-28-2008, 05:43 AM   #1
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I want to share a theory with you, guys

I want to share a theory I've composed (and to nudge up my awesome unique post count).

It is simply this: taking The Onion as a test case, I propose that any story, no matter how horrible, mad and demented, can be made into comedy gold by means of its reportage in terms of 'Area Man'/'Area Woman'.

So instead of 'An unnamed suspect in the petrol bombing of the local court house', we could have 'Area Man Blows Up Courthouse'.

And you can see that the applicability of this is literally, endless. It's in fact limitless in its scope.

Post pictures of you saluting me, guys.
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Old 07-28-2008, 05:47 AM   #2
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I'll be happy to salute you this morning, Kieran:







"Area Man gets drunk and falls out of 2nd story window"
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Old 07-28-2008, 05:52 AM   #3
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Excellent.

I am Area Man's raging bile duct.
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Old 07-28-2008, 06:25 AM   #4
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what wiv 3rd pic?
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Old 07-28-2008, 08:32 AM   #5
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I can promise you that there's already some Hollywood executive developing an Area Man movie on a fast-track.
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Old 07-28-2008, 11:13 AM   #6
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I only salute those about to rock, are you about to or have you ever rocked?
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Old 07-28-2008, 04:27 PM   #7
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Area man uses Kieran's skull as bong?
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Old 07-28-2008, 05:50 PM   #8
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I enjoy when Zoots rolls into these types of threads.
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Old 07-28-2008, 06:26 PM   #9
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Old 07-28-2008, 06:52 PM   #10
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Area man reads this thread and realizes he has to take a massive shit, does so and never returns to internets (teh).

Area woman reads this thread, decides her life isn't worth living and sets herself on fire.

Area transsexual reads this thread, contemplates turning his/her life over to God, opens church and is later accused by several congregation members of sexual assualt.

Area spambot reads this thread, was originally planning on spamming this thread with 100,000 different sexual stimuli remedies, instead spambot decides to go Fuck itself.

Area 51 aliens, in a response to reading this thread, telepathically communicate with the mothership which in turn prepares an all out assault on planet earth.

:mushroom cloud:
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Old 07-29-2008, 01:58 AM   #11
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According to news.com.au, this would be:

Area Man says: QANTAS safe to fly with

Area Man could 'disappear'

Air passengers scuffle with Area Man

Starbucks closes its doors on Australia, Area Man layoffs

And in ShowBuzz:
David Beckham falls for Area Woman's raunchy routines
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Old 07-29-2008, 03:43 AM   #12
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Area Man Pisses In Your Mouth
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Old 07-29-2008, 10:24 AM   #13
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Didn't see that coming.

Up next, an exclusive report on Area Man's clandestine dealings with Frank the Monkey.
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Old 07-30-2008, 10:38 PM   #14
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Area Man = my new band name
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Old 07-30-2008, 11:02 PM   #15
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Area man mauled by you know who.
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