how would you like to die

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This might be a tough subject since some of us have lost loved ones recently, and probably don't want to think about death.

But to answer your question, I would like to go in my sleep.
 
I'd like to get run over by those farming plows that reap the harvest
 
in bassys arms

those strong masculine arms {sigh}
 
HelloAngel said:
This might be a tough subject since some of us have lost loved ones recently, and probably don't want to think about death.

But to answer your question, I would like to go in my sleep.
Click to expand...


I understand, everyone has lost someone at one point or another. I do not know everyone personally to know their story but this question was not intended to hit anyone's "sensitive" spot, just posting a thread that is all with neautral intentions. I understand that the subject of death is a touchy one and those who are sensitive have either not bothered to open the thread or have not replied. People are a lot smarter than you think love :)
 
My 4 year old is just *obsessed* with death lately.
I am put in this hideous position where she asks things like
"mommy, if we keep eating growing food, will we never die?" and "mommy, will you ever die?" sometimes sort of combining them and saying "mommy, I don't want to grow up. mommy, if I grow up will you die?"..

try answering that while driving!

She might be on a couple different trips.
She knows my dad died when I was young, so she probably worries about losing me. It's not like we spend lots of time around grandfathers or anything, but maybe she's somehow
picking up that my father's death was the kind you
just don't want to have yourself.
I presume, anyway.

He smoked for years, but never in my sight, so that wasn't part of the trip (great, thanks, so then I take it up as an adolescent cuz it's too fun and it's waaaaay hard to quit! Easy while pregnant and nursing, easy some other times, hard sometimes too. Someone I know who struggles with it says she tries to tell herself that she'll start again when she's like 70 and not worried about it anymore...).
He got lung cancer, hacked and hacked and hacked and struggled to breathe and everytime he laughed at johnny carson or benny hill he had a coughing fit.
But still he was cool, not bed-ridden, amazing really. He got worse over two years,
told by his doctors that he shouldn't drive anymore,
too dangerous to take the kids with him since he might just
keel over any moment. He took us out anyway.

The morning he died, my first day of a new school, he was supposed to take me there, and instead the cancer
wrapped itself around his aorta and broke it and every single drop of blood
in his body splurted out and spilled.
It was rather…dramatic, shall we say. And my 10 year old self watched it.
And all I could think about for a very long time was how he must have felt,
Watching his life leave him like that, standing at the toilet where it happened. I think it was probably very quick and who knows if he was processing what was happening to him, but we did, and I just wouldn’t want that tohappen to my kids..

So, hmm…I wouldn’t want to die that way, off the list.

A person might love all their kids the same, but seems to me they often have a favorite parent, and he was mine.
But the other death-scene I’ve experienced in an especially charged way was very recent, and didn’t end in actual death so it’s less loaded for me…
I just got back from seeing my old mom off to a very complex surgery, like two months ago.
To replace a big section of her aorta ironically enough.
They told us that there was a 30% chance of death from the surgery alone, and then all
The complications after could take you...
I have tons and tons of unresolved issues with her, and with my sister with whom I was tending to her, but there was something about this scene, this sending her off and saying goodbye when she was just going off to sleep, getting ready for the next day’s trip, but from which trip she might not wake, that was
Really freeing.
She was surrendering herself, but just to sleep.
And to hope. A hope she was choosing.

I can only think I was prepared for a bad outcome, for death. But that didn’t happen this time, though she’s just still tentatively and slowly getting back to the rest of life.

I don’t know that it has done anything to make me feel comfortable with the idea
Of death, but I feel like it’s made me a little less worried about the people left behind.

Whew… I’m really sorry…
Did you just want a one-word answer?!

Love and peace and cheers….
 
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Diane L said:

I want to die in the arms of someone who loves me. I'm afraid of dying alone.
Click to expand...

My co-worker recently lost his father and he told me how his father passed away. He died exactly like what you said above, he collapsed in the arms of his wife. I find that beautiful.
 
Oh, Shellbethere...

I want to die in the arms of someone who loves me. I'm afraid of dying alone.
Click to expand...




Now I'm getting a little verklempt...

Yeah, I feel that way too...

Maybe that's actually why when I die in my dreams, it's almost always (NO really!) in one of those atomic bomb-type devastation dreams. Sometimes I start getting eaten by a shark, but
I sort of conquered that as a kid in the bronx swimming out
in the sound (I'm seriously getting really fucking terrified again!)
after they'd close the beach for an alleged shark sighting (yeah, right, like a shark could live in such shit water!)..

I don't know if this happens so much to people born from say, 1990 to 2000, post cold-war and pre-9/11. But I had at least
a couple a year thru the 80s for sure of very intense atomic bomb dreams, where you get to say goodbye to your love(s), die holding them. And a little less often maybe thru the 90s. But they're appearing again for me actually.
Somehow the one I just had where ewan mcgregor (hubby would so be sick of hearing that riff!) disappeared and got replaced by my son wasn't as terrifying as they usually are.
It was actually kind of a pretty landscape and the way the hills were rolling with the roar of a world-ending detonation was rather beautiful.
Maybe that's the ultimate arrogance, though, not wanting to die alone, feeling better if the whole world goes with you, even though it seems a love vibe. It surely feels a deep need...

I don't know, so maybe DianeL you're kinda saying that my dad's death wasn't such a bad trip if he saw us there with him.
That's a comforting thought actually.

I don't know...I guess some people might prefer to die alone. I can't decide which type of person I am just now...

but the crapper is right fucking out for me, that's all I'd ask!

I'm *going* to finish that can of guiness now...
cheers!
 
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