Father Ted

[TheQuiet1]

I've noticed that there seems to be quite a few Father Ted fans around here and I haven't watched Father Ted for ages (myself and one of my friends used to be HUGE fans of the show). So, remind me of what I've been missing! Favourite quotes, characters, episodes etc. Go nuts!

 

[financeguy]

"That. Would be. An ecumenical matter!!"

 

[AvsGirl41]

"Oh come on, Ted, it's like that stuff we learned in seminary--heaven and hell and everlasting life, and all that. You're not meant to take it seriously, Ted!"

"Yes, you are, Dougal!"

"What, heaven, hell and everlasting life?"

"Yes!!"

*snicker*

 

[TheQuiet1]

"I told you Dougal, that money was just resting in my account"


MRS DOYLE: "I hope you like my scones Father, I put cocaine in them"

TED: "Cocaine?!"

MRS DOYLE: "No, not cocaine, what was it now? Ah, yes, raisins that was it, I always get those two mixed up!"


And that episode where the fathers are all on a plane that's about to crash and there's only two parachutes which Ted is desperately trying to persuade Dougal that they should have. The scene then cuts to a mid-air Father Jack with one parachute closely followed by the drinks trolley wearing the other.

 

[MissVelvetDress_75]

^!

 

[impy13]

What's Father Ted

 

[BluRmGrl]

What's Father Ted

OMG!! - It's just one of the funniest sitcoms on BBC America (at least, that's where I see it )

I believe it's actually Irish, but it's a sitcom about Father Ted, who's kind of been banished to Craggy Island (a miniscule parish) because he's such a horrible priest. Mrs. Doyle is the air-headed housekeeper (whose answer to everything is "A nice, hot cup of tea"), Dougal is the young, idiot priest-in-training, and Father Jack is a crotchety, unintelligible, vile retired priest who's only comprehensible word is "DRINK!!" (the distilled type, mind you).

It's particularly funny to me, because here in the States you never see such irreverance when it comes to religious matters. We're waaay too uptight about that! Anyway, it's a great show - you should watch it if you ever get the chance!

I love the episode where the milkman (what WAS his name???) is caught 'making his rounds' - if you know what I mean.

 

[elevation2u]

hahaha, so i'm not the only one
but what is father ted?
must be way before my time

 

[impy13]

Sounds like a funny premise. Thanks blurmy

 

[FlyYourKite]

Father Ted is absolutely hilarious I have them all on tape.

"It's fabulous being a priest - think of all that comfort you bring to the sick and dying. They love it, they can't get enough of it!"

"Meals are at eleven, one, half-two, three, five, seven, and nine, and if you want a quick snack, you can just ask Mrs. Doyle there."

 

[AvsGirl41]

Check your library, you can usually check a boxed set or two out there. I love how they get in regular sitcom scrapes, only they're all priests and nuns--like when Dougal fell under the influence of the punk priest and had his ear pierced.

The Fun Fair episode was definitely my favorite.
"Father! I've killed a man!"
"Oh, we'll talk about that later. Right now, I'm going to be on the telly!!"

 

[TheQuiet1]

I love the episode where the milkman (what WAS his name???) is caught 'making his rounds' - if you know what I mean.

TED:<something along the lines of> well, I hope you're practising safe sex!

MILKMAN GUY WHOSE NAME I CAN'T REMEMBER EITHER: You wouldn't be advocating the use of contraception dere would ya Father?

TED:

To everyone who hasn't seen it/heard of it: it's really silly (I mean that in a good way) and quite surreal but I completely recommend it. As do U2, they thank Father Ted in the thank you section of 'POP'. (As some of you may have noticed from another thread I posted, I am very anal and actually read the thank-you section in albums, all the time thinking "WOW! They know some-and-so" or "what the heck did that jerk have to do with anything?")

 

[hippy]

Since falling in love with this show, I have started to say


Ah, go on!


all the time


And I watch it on BBC America too!


My favorite episode (that I've seen) is the one with the sheep contest... I almost peed I was laughing so hard the first time I saw that!

 

[Mullen4Prez]

Father ted One word class!

 

[Niamh_Saoirse]

I think my sig says it all!

|
|
|
|

 

[AvsGirl41]

As do U2, they thank Father Ted in the thank you section of 'POP'. (As some of you may have noticed from another thread I posted, I am very anal and actually read the thank-you section in albums, all the time thinking "WOW! They know some-and-so" or "what the heck did that jerk have to do with anything?")

In the Fun Fair episode, Dougal had a Joshua Tree poster above his bed.

 

[Niamh_Saoirse]

Ted: I know for a fact St. Tibulus wore more clothes then that. He was from Norway or somewhere, he'd have frozen to death
Dougal: And do you remember that bit when St. Tibulas tried to take that banana off the other lad
Ted: That wasn't a banana Dougal

Fr. Stack: You're sittin' there, watching those young boys in shorts. With a big smile on your face. Ye daerty feckers

Dougal: (trying to pray) Hail Mary who art in heaven.......
Ted: Hallowed.
Dougal: Oh yeah. Hallowed Be....
Ted: Thy Name...
Dougal: Papa Don't Preach........
Ted: Dougal, you know you can praise the lord with sleep.
Dougal: Really Ted? You can praise him in lots of ways, like that time you said that I could praise him just by leaving the room.
Ted: Yes, that was a good one !

 

[tarquinsuperb]

One of the greatest sitcoms ever I can't believe it's taken so long for a thread to form. One of the highlights of my Croke Park trip was picking up a Father Jack t-shirt on O'Connell Street for only 6 euros.

Father Jack:
(Dreaming about judging a Wet T-shirt competition)
"More Water!"

Dougal: Hello there Len.
Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you little prick. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'!
Dougal: Ah right you are there Len.
later on
Dougal: (entering the room) Ah did Len find the rabbits.

Ted: His note from the bishop said they never really found a suitable place for him... he's not a very nice man, is he?
Dougal: God, Ted. I've never met anyone like him anywhere... who would he be like - Hitler or one of those mad fellas.
Ted: Oh, worse than Hitler. You wouldn't find Hitler playing jungle music at 3 o'clock in the morning.

 

[Niamh_Saoirse]

Mrs Doyle: Oh she writes such filth, Father. It's always "Feck this" and "Feck that" - and sometimes she even uses the "F" word!

Mrs Doyle: (whilst Ted is trying to eat a sausage) Oh it's a filthy, dirty business, sex. Can you imagine, Father. Your husband standing over you with his lad in his hand, wanting you to degrade yourself. I want you to get a good clear picture.

Jack : Feck! Nuns! Reverse! Reverse!

I love Father Jack!

 

[Mr. BAW]

Feck 'yeah! We've got 3 seasons-worth on DVD...a riot.!

 

[tarquinsuperb]

See all these really good quotes and we've still got my Lovely Horse to come.
Who's going to do the honours?

 

[Niamh_Saoirse]

Ted : You know the phrase 'to take care of something'? Well, I realise now that you meant that in a sort of Al Pacino way. Whereas I was thinking more along the lines of Julie Andrews.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Dougal : God I've never seen a clock at 5 a.m. before!

TED- So there he is. Risen from the dead. Like that feller.... E.T.

Ted : I think we'd all like to make a little sacrifice.
Jack : SACRIFICE? ARSE!

 

[Niamh_Saoirse]

Jack: DON'T TELL ME I'M STILL ON THAT FECKIN' ISLAND!!!


Bishop Brennan: You will address me by my proper title, you little bollocks!

Mrs Doyle: Pat was just wondering if he could put his massive tool in my box.

Ted: What was it [Jack] used to say about the needy? He had a term for them.
Dougal: A shower of bastards. laugh

 

[Mr. BAW]

"Hello, Father...I hear you're a racist!"

 

[BAW]

Careful now!

Down with this sort of thing!

 

[hippy]

Dougal: Hello there Len.
Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you little prick. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'!
Dougal: Ah right you are there Len.
later on
Dougal: (entering the room) Ah did Len find the rabbits.

That is one of my favorite episodes!


Who am I kidding... they're all great!


I really need to get these on dvd...

 

[BluRmGrl]

In the Fun Fair episode, Dougal had a Joshua Tree poster above his bed.

I KNEW I'd seen that!!! Matter of fact, I asked somebody about that in a thread that I started a month or so ago about U2 references in TV & movies.

Glad you were able to confirm it for me, Av!!

 

[AvsGirl41]

"These are small, Dougal. Those are far away..."

"I don't believe in organized religion...and God, does He exist? I don't know. And then there's Spider Baby...it's got the body of a spider, but the mind of a baby."
"Is that gobshite never off the air!!"

 

[TheQuiet1]

See all these really good quotes and we've still got my Lovely Horse to come.
Who's going to do the honours?

Seeing as you were so polite about it, not wanting to steal the hilarity away from anyone else, we'll let you do it.

 

[smooshcat]

I LOVE MY BRICK!