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Old 12-19-2006, 10:19 PM   #1
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Everybody has premarital sex

NEW YORK - More than nine out of 10 Americans, men and women alike, have had premarital sex, according to a new study. The high rates extend even to women born in the 1940s, challenging perceptions that people were more chaste in the past.

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"This is reality-check research," said the study's author, Lawrence Finer. "Premarital sex is normal behavior for the vast majority of Americans, and has been for decades."

Finer is a research director at the Guttmacher Institute, a private New York-based think tank that studies sexual and reproductive issues and which disagrees with government-funded programs that rely primarily on abstinence-only teachings. The study, released Tuesday, appears in the new issue of Public Health Reports.

The study, examining how sexual behavior before marriage has changed over time, was based on interviews conducted with more than 38,000 people — about 33,000 of them women — in 1982, 1988, 1995 and 2002 for the federal National Survey of Family Growth. According to Finer's analysis, 99 percent of the respondents had had sex by age 44, and 95 percent had done so before marriage.

Even among a subgroup of those who abstained from sex until at least age 20, four-fifths had had premarital sex by age 44, the study found.

Finer said the likelihood of Americans having sex before marriage has remained stable since the 1950s, though people now wait longer to get married and thus are sexually active as singles for extensive periods.

The study found women virtually as likely as men to engage in premarital sex, even those born decades ago. Among women born between 1950 and 1978, at least 91 percent had had premarital sex by age 30, he said, while among those born in the 1940s, 88 percent had done so by age 44.

"The data clearly show that the majority of older teens and adults have already had sex before marriage, which calls into question the federal government's funding of abstinence-only-until-marriage programs for 12- to 29-year-olds," Finer said.

Under the Bush administration, such programs have received hundreds of millions of dollars in federal funding.

"It would be more effective," Finer said, "to provide young people with the skills and information they need to be safe once they become sexually active — which nearly everyone eventually will."

Wade Horn, assistant secretary for children and families at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, defended the abstinence-only approach for teenagers.

"One of its values is to help young people delay the onset of sexual activity," he said. "The longer one delays, the fewer lifetime sex partners they have, and the less the risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease."

He insisted there was no federal mission against premarital sex among adults.

"Absolutely not," Horn said. "The Bush administration does not believe the government should be regulating or stigmatizing the behavior of adults."

Horn said he found the high percentages of premarital sex cited in the study to be plausible, and expressed hope that society would not look askance at the small minority that chooses to remain abstinent before marriage.

However, Janice Crouse of Concerned Women for America, a conservative group which strongly supports abstinence-only education, said she was skeptical of the findings.

"Any time I see numbers that high, I'm a little suspicious," she said. "The numbers are too pat."

Leslee Unruh, who runs a South Dakota-based organization promoting abstinence-only education, contended that increasing numbers of young people were open to remaining chaste until marriage.

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This is depressing to me because I am 33 and still a virgin. So this makes me a total loser.

But in a way, I am glad that I am still a virgin because I wholeheartedly believe that you should wait until after marriage. To me, in the eyes of God, sex before marriage is a sin. I know that sounds corny, but I really believe this. If I ever I had sex before marriage, the guilt in me would be totally, totally overwhelming. I hope I don't come across as being judgemental towards people who have had premarital sex. I am not being judgemental.
In the past, I have doubted my faith in God, but lately, I am trying to rediscover my faith and I am trying to live a sin-free, peaceful life. So, in reality, I hope to fall in love one day, get married, have kids and raise a family. But until I get rid of my notion that I am an ugly-looking guy and that women don't like me because I am ugly, then I don't know if that will ever happen.
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Old 12-19-2006, 10:29 PM   #2
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Joe I really don't understand what you want here. You post the same thing every time. You get the attention you're looking for. But you never respond to what people have to say. You don't consider our advice or anything.

What are you looking for? What do you want us to do? What do you need? How can we help you?
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Old 12-19-2006, 10:33 PM   #3
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I don't think this thread should be here.
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Old 12-19-2006, 10:38 PM   #4
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ok...sex...is an issue.

high school is where you gotta be a slut, you gotta put out or guys just won't like you "fuck the personality" i got told one day "its all about the sex and how they give it". i looked at this kid like he was some kinda freak. who says that?!?!?! this kid is one of the jocks or popular kids? as some would call him. ok first date for me grade 7, first real boyfriend grade 8. I've never had sex and i won't for a few years and i ill admit that I'm NOT waiting for marriage!! I have many "Christan" friends who've had sex and many friends who have had sex. my best friends had it while drunk. what the hell is that, not the way i want it. these are my standards:
i gotta date the guy for a year and a half first and we have to have a relation ship going on. my sister is pregnant at 18 not gonna happen to me and another friend who is 14 and is pregnant.

as i always say can't get to UCLA with a kid

don't feel like a loser, you're just smart
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Old 12-19-2006, 10:39 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by redhotswami
Joe I really don't understand what you want here. You post the same thing every time. You get the attention you're looking for. But you never respond to what people have to say. You don't consider our advice or anything.
exactly.

the news part of it could go in fym, but the bottom part is more suited for zc. i don't really feel comfortable moving this thread as it is to either forum, nor do i think it belongs here, like lara said.

so i guess i'll close it. feel free to repost this story in fym though if you'd like, joe.
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