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Old 12-29-2003, 05:08 AM   #1
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Citizens Of Great Britain, I Present To You Your True King,00.html

Royal battle of Hastings

MICHAEL Hastings, 62, a widower from Jerilderie, in southern NSW, has just been told he and his ancestors are, in all probability, the true inheritors of the English throne.

"Just call me Mike," says Mr Hastings, "everyone else does."
I am talking to the last great Plantagenet - the man who, it is claimed, should by rights be King Michael I of England and living in Buckingham Palace.

Instead, he is in a T-shirt and shorts, sitting in a bungalow with a glass of beer in hand after a hard day's work.

This is no joke but historical fact, based on startling research by leading historians.

Dr Michael Jones, an acclaimed historical biographer, believes he has proved a vital fact that should bring shudders to the Queen and her family: their right to rule is based on a lie that has been perpetuated for more than 500 years. It comes down to the fact that King Edward IV, who reigned from 1461 to 1483, was not of royal blood - he was the illegitimate son of a French archer.

This single fact invalidates the claim to sovereignty of the most famous of English monarchs, from Elizabeth I to Charles II to Victoria and the Georges.

For if Edward IV was illegitimate - and Dr Jones believes he has found the proof - the heirs of his younger brother, George, Duke of Clarence, are the rightful inheritors of the English throne.

Dr Jones said: "The consequences are staggering. It's exhilarating and terrifying in equal measure."

But "King" Mike is not quite as Australian as his rich accent suggests. Born in England and educated at posh Ampleforth School, he is the 14th Earl of Loudon, a direct descendant of George, Duke of Clarence, and possessor of a string of lesser titles. Grand though his lineage is, he says that in Australia it is bad enough being a Pom, let alone a titled one, and in his early days as a jackaroo he kept his background secret.

The crucial evidence comes from a document Dr Jones recently discovered in the library of Rouen Cathedral in France.

It proves, he says, that at the time of Edward IV's conception, his parents were 200km apart.

Edward's "father", Richard, Duke of York, was leading a skirmishing party against the French at Pontoise, near Paris. Edward's mother, Lady Cicely Neville - based at Rouen - was apparently deeply engrossed in the company of a local archer.

Mr Hastings didn't realise his claim to the throne until Dr Jones and the TV crew contacted him.

"Strewth!" was his reaction.

Will he be returning to Britain, to his birthright and all those palaces, money and servants?

"No," he says slowly, "I don't think so. I love Australia."


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Old 12-29-2003, 05:11 AM   #2
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Old 12-29-2003, 05:37 AM   #3
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yertle whoz the girl in your avatar..

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Old 12-29-2003, 06:09 AM   #4
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Old 12-29-2003, 06:35 AM   #5
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no australian says 'strewth'.

damn pommie imports.
send him home.
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Old 12-29-2003, 03:56 PM   #6
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Wow, last of the Plantagenets.

I've always thought the Plantagenet line was probably broken before that--Edward II was a known homosexual and it was whispered he was not the father of Edward III. (Something Braveheart happily exploited.) Or probably before then--think of all the unhappy political marriages, kings hiding their sexuality, away for years during campaigns--there were probably an awful lot of illegitimate heirs! Check your lineages, people!

And I'll bet the German Windsors have always known they were on shaky ground.
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Old 12-29-2003, 07:12 PM   #7
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I've traced my own ancestry back to the eighteenth century. I've had to trash an undetermined number of phoney ancestry stories, including a claim that my family was originally a Westphalian noble family. We're not. We're nobodies originally from Austria.
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Old 12-31-2003, 05:07 AM   #8
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Originally posted by verte76
We're not. We're nobodies originally from Austria.

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Old 12-31-2003, 06:07 PM   #9
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Yep, I saw this in our newpaper. Go that guy!
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Old 12-31-2003, 09:58 PM   #10
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Re: Citizens Of Great Britain, I Present To You Your True King

Originally posted by yertle-the-turtle

I wonder if there is a story like this in LOTR.I'm thinking the fat hobbit in the beginning of FoTR.
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Old 01-03-2004, 07:28 PM   #11
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Well, if it is any consolation, royalty is littered with dirty secrets and probably plenty of illegitimate royals, hence probably invalidating even this claim.


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