Can Guys be ONLY FRIENDS with GIRLS?

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it would have been interesting if this was a poll where you had to idnetify if you were male or female when answering the question. i think more females tend to think it is possible while the guys maybe tend to think it is harder. maybe its because you girls dont really know what is going on in your "guy friends" minds...

or i may be an idiot
 
:| I am living with a friend right now that I wish was more than a friend, but he isn't interested in me. So there. Guys can have girls for friends and not want them.

:scream:
 
Bbug said:

edited to say, I think the only reason my friendships with straight guys work out is because they don't think of me as a female person. I mean, there's some bizarre de-girlifying logic in the way that they view me. They'll always be like "Hey, did you see such-and-such an interview in Maxim?" and I'm all "Why the hell would I be reading Maxim?" And they just kind of stand there with this befuddled look on their faces, like "Oh, crap, I forgot, she's a girl!" I think if I weren't into sports, or if I were more physically attractive or something, the friendship wouldn't work out, y'know?

:laugh: yes i have fallen into the just one of the guy roles. having to read articles in Maxim, Playboy, etc.

i swear sometimes they do forget i am a female and say things they shouldn't infront of me. :devil: i don't mind it is fun.

and chiz, i am the idiot, i was going to do a poll, but i could not figure out how to do one. :reject:
 
TripThruUreWires said:
Can a girl be ONLY FRIENDS with a guy?

Absolutely. Not a problem.

Can a guy be ONLY FRIENDS with a girl?

From personal experience, i would have to say it's highly unlikely. The majority of my friends have been guys; however, maintaining it at the platonic level has been pretty difficult and frustrating on my part. Honestly, i'm not trying to sound egotistical or anything, but i'd have to say that around 99% of all of my guy friends have tried to move in on me at some point--whether i had a boyfriend or not at the time. I should point out that I do nothing whatsoever to mislead them. Unfortunately, once i find out they are interested in me romantically, the relationship somehow becomes tainted and i automatically become self-conscious of my every action and response whenever i'm around them.

EXACTLY!!!!!! you are not being egotistical at all. i have had this happend to me many of times with out me giving out any hints. actually i would have thought i would have given off the "there is NO way" vibe to them plenty, but for some reason it doesn't sink in for some. for example one of my best male friends tried to put the moves on me last summer. it shocked me and came out of left field. he and i have been friends for 5 years now and he tried to plant a kiss on me! :mad: i had to shove him away from me and quickly left to go home. it made me mad. i was just sitting on the couch minding my business watching freakin ESPN sportscenter and he plots down beside me and pulls that stunt on me. he was not the first guy to do that which is another reason it annoyed me. and because of the attempt makeout sesson he wanted, i wouldn't go out with him for months after incident because i was so mad with him. in fact i am going to LA with him and his friends at the end of July for a weekend. and i am worried he is going to do this shit again. actually this is the reason for this thread. i have stated to him i am not interested in him as anything more and have no desire to try anything. he has stated he is cool and undestands and has apologized for his actions, but he is still making comments and attempting moves on me. now it is like I am some challenge for his book of conquers. :huh:
 
MissVelvetDress_75 said:


he has stated he is cool and undestands and has apologized for his actions, but he is still making comments and attempting moves on me. now it is like I am some challenge for his book of conquers. :huh:

Then he is not cool at all and he needs one of these in his ass.

safety-boot.jpg
 
MissVelvetDress_75 said:
one of my best male friends tried to put the moves on me last summer. it shocked me and came out of left field. he and i have been friends for 5 years now and he tried to plant a kiss on me! :mad: i had to shove him away from me and quickly left to go home. it made me mad. i was just sitting on the couch minding my business watching freakin ESPN sportscenter and he plots down beside me and pulls that stunt on me. he was not the first guy to do that which is another reason it annoyed me. and because of the attempt makeout sesson he wanted, i wouldn't go out with him for months after incident because i was so mad with him. in fact i am going to LA with him and his friends at the end of July for a weekend. and i am worried he is going to do this shit again. actually this is the reason for this thread. i have stated to him i am not interested in him as anything more and have no desire to try anything. he has stated he is cool and undestands and has apologized for his actions, but he is still making comments and attempting moves on me. now it is like I am some challenge for his book of conquers. :huh:

oh come on, give me a break! you obviously set yourself up for that one...sitting down on a couch watching espn!! you might as well have sat point blank in front of him and pulled a sharon stone ala Basic Instinct! :der: :tsk: ;)

perhaps we girls continue to hang out with straight guys while clinging on to this far fetched hope that they are capable of looking past our breasts and cootchie (is that an actual term :shrug: ) to see our inherent value as nothing more than a friend. anyway, i suppose i will continue to subscribe to this idea, despite the fact that i have been proven wrong time after time. . .it's true, i love the male species way toooo much...PLATONICALLY that is (haha...i just know the single guys of interference are sitting behind their computers cringing every time they see that word appear: :hug:basstrap:hug:).

missvelvet.....i suggest you invest in a stungun for this upcoming trip to L.A.....i'm sure it will come in handy. use it directly on his frankfurter and beans if he tries anything funny. don't worry, it will be a true test of your friendship. if he truly values your friendship in any way, he'll make an effort to curb the surges in testosterone.
 
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I'm in this thread a bit late, but my 0.02....I have a lot of male friends. Many of them I have met through U2 related things like Propaganda and interference, and others I have met at work or the cottage or whatever.

Yes of course, some of them have been attracted to me and admitted as much, but that hasn't done anything to harm the friendship at all. In fact, it puts me in a very good mood being around them and knowing that SOMEONE other than my husband is attracted to me. You can objectively say you have an attractive friend and even flirt a bit without things going haywire. That's what makes man friends so much fun! I am equally fine with my husband having all the women friends and flirting that he wants too. I can't understand these couples who won't let each other have friends of the opposite sex. Nuts to that I say!

I also have male friends who have no attraction to me whatsoever and that's fine too. The problem is when friends cross the line uninvited, and unfortunately that's what happened to you Iris. That really sucks, being put in the position of feeling awkward around one of your close friends.
 
My best friend for the past ten years is a female. We had a rough couple years in our friendship because we both told each other how we felt, and we acted on those feelings. Problem is, she was married. To make matters worse, she ended up getting divorced(nothing to do with me), so the whole matter came up again. She realizes how I feel about her, but they were far more than what she felt for me. Our friendship is completely different than it used to be, but fortunately it was strong enough to keep going through all of this. I want her to be happy first and foremost, and I'm still dealing with the fact that, well, you can't make people feel a certain way about you. I would never want to give up being friends with her either. My answer to the question is yes, it is possible to be friends. It can be tricky at times though....I guess.
 
to put an end to the conversation, i will invoke the words of a man i've quoted many a time in this forum, the greatest social commentator of our time... mr. chris rock.

'Lot of women here tonight, that's good. i like women, my mom's a woman, that helps. you know one cool thing about women? women get to have platonic friends.... "he's my pal, he's my bud, he's my platonic friend, i love him like a brother, he's my bud, he's my platonic friend." men don't have platonic friends. we just have women we haven't fu:censored:ed yet. i mean we've got some platonic friends. i've got some, but they're allll by accident. every platonic friend i got is someone i was tryin' to f:censored:k... made a wrong turn somewhere... and ended up in the friend zone... "oh no... i'm in the friend zone." women keep platonic friends forever. why? 'cause you never know. they get rid of girlfriends every week, but they keep them platonic friends around forever... why? 'cause ya never know. you know what a platonic friend is to a woman? a di:censored:k in a glass case. in case of emergency, break open glass. and fellas, if your woman has platonic friends, that's who she'll be fu:censored:ing when you mess up. that's right. it's going to happen to you. you know the next man to f:censored:k your woman. you've met him, he's been in your house, he ate your food, he drank your wine... and he shall betray you.
 
Michael Griffiths said:
PrincessBadgirl - what if your sig. other had (platonic) female friends from before the time he met you? Would you still have a problem with that, and would you have a problem with him keeping such friends? Or would you expect him to cut off his friendships with those (once again, platonic friends who were never his girlfriends) females?

I wouldn't have a problem with it whatsoever. My ex had many platonic girlfriends and I had no problem with that, I knew I had nothing to worry about. I'm not a tyrant, I do understand that beyond my capacity at this time, girls and guys can be friends *just hasn't happened to me*.

The ex situation, I will always stick to my way of handling it, not because I'm stubborn but because I don't like feeling torn. His ex was the one that kept hanging around and while they were friends she kept trying to talk him out of the relationship with me... now, who here is going to say "sure!! go hang out with your ex girlfriend/boyfriend who is telling you I'm not worth it!! have fun!! let him/her seduce too!"? No one. It's either or when it comes to that foolishness.
 
TripThruUreWires said:


oh come on, give me a break! you obviously set yourself up for that one...sitting down on a couch watching espn!! you might as well have sat point blank in front of him and pulled a sharon stone ala Basic Instinct! :der: :tsk: ;)

:laugh:

TripThruUreWires said:


perhaps we girls continue to hang out with straight guys while clinging on to this far fetched hope that they are capable of looking past our breasts and cootchie (is that an actual term :shrug: ) to see our inherent value as nothing more than a friend.

if this were to ever come true, i will be the first one to report this to you all.

TripThruUreWires said:


missvelvet.....i suggest you invest in a stungun for this upcoming trip to L.A.....i'm sure it will come in handy. use it directly on his frankfurter and beans if he tries anything funny. don't worry, it will be a true test of your friendship. if he truly values your friendship in any way, he'll make an effort to curb the surges in testosterone.

:lol: good lord franks and beans!

i am going to see how many times he throws up the cock block whenever i talk to his buddies or any guys i meet. and you guys should all know what i mean by Cock Blocking.
 
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Nate Dogg said:
My best friend for the past ten years is a female. We had a rough couple years in our friendship because we both told each other how we felt, and we acted on those feelings. Problem is, she was married. To make matters worse, she ended up getting divorced(nothing to do with me), so the whole matter came up again. She realizes how I feel about her, but they were far more than what she felt for me. Our friendship is completely different than it used to be, but fortunately it was strong enough to keep going through all of this. I want her to be happy first and foremost, and I'm still dealing with the fact that, well, you can't make people feel a certain way about you. I would never want to give up being friends with her either. My answer to the question is yes, it is possible to be friends. It can be tricky at times though....I guess.

I've been (well, sorta still am) in a very similar situation, Nate.
 
MissVelvetDress_75 said:
if this were to ever come true, i will be the first one to report this to you all.

WTF - you do not give guys enough credit......I think I am a prime example. This pisses me off.

I am always SOOOOO afraid of women who take this attitude Tripthruyourwires takes......"They only want me for my body" crap. :rolleyes: :scream: Get over yourself.

I have plenty of female friends that I have a lot in common with, yet do not want ANYTHING physically with them. And if my "trips to visit Interferencers" is not an indication of this, I don't know what is.

I have mostly female friends - some of them VERY attractive physically - but, there is no interest in a physical relationship. I watch them get involved in relationships - and laugh, as I try to console them and give them a guys perspective. I have also had FOUR female roomies - again, nothing beyond friendship.

So, yes, "opposites" can be friends - and even share a close and confined space with no problems.
 
equal gender respect activist :p

But it hasn't happened with all of your male friends, no?

So, you do know it is possible to have a plutonic relationship with a guy, right?

We are friends. I am not gay. I have not put any moves on you and do not plan too. So. therefore, logically speaking...it is possible.

I just hate seeing that "all non-gay guys are after female bodies and nothing else" all of the time. It is like saying that women are only after a wedding ring.
 
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Nate Dogg said:
My best friend for the past ten years is a female. We had a rough couple years in our friendship because we both told each other how we felt, and we acted on those feelings. Problem is, she was married. To make matters worse, she ended up getting divorced(nothing to do with me), so the whole matter came up again. She realizes how I feel about her, but they were far more than what she felt for me. Our friendship is completely different than it used to be, but fortunately it was strong enough to keep going through all of this. I want her to be happy first and foremost, and I'm still dealing with the fact that, well, you can't make people feel a certain way about you. I would never want to give up being friends with her either. My answer to the question is yes, it is possible to be friends. It can be tricky at times though....I guess.

you just explained the last 4 years of my life my friend... only without the part about still being friends... :shrug: ahhh being single sucks... i think i should reopen the singleton's thread in zoo-confessionals
 
MissVelvetDress_75 said:
you are not a close friend like the ones i am referring to. and i would say a good percentage of my close male friends have at one time attempted a move on me. and i do appreciate you not wanting to put the moves on me.

Clarification: close friends. :up:

Well, anyway - it is possible. I am a living example. Maybe it is just the type of people you guys hang out with. :shrug:
 
zonelistener said:
I am always SOOOOO afraid of women who take this attitude Tripthruyourwires takes......"They only want me for my body" crap. :rolleyes: :scream: Get over yourself.

Down boy! Someone's got something stuck up his ass and doesn't know how to discern sarcasm from seriousness. As MissVelvet pointed out, we we're speaking purely from personal experience...and if i'm not mistaken, we CLEARLY POINTED THAT OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE! As you can see reading through all the posts, everyone has a different perception of the matter based on what they themselves have experienced. You yourself are basing your opinion on your own experience. My second post in response to MissVelvet's was obviously exaggerated and to be taken with a grain of salt. Oh wait, i suppose stiff fucks like yourself need a :sexywink: to help you get that. So with all due offence zonelistener: fuck you! you have no right to tell me to get over myself....you don't know me, you don't have the slightest idea what type of individual i am based on what i post on a message board, so don't assert that you do!

so with that said: :hug:zonelistener:hug: :sexywink:
 
zonelistener said:


Well, anyway - it is possible. I am a living example. Maybe it is just the type of people you guys hang out with. :shrug:

:huh: what is that suppose to mean? i love my male friends very much. just because some at one point have tried a move on me doesn't mean they are pricks. yes i get annoyed and mad at them for doing that, but hell i get annoyed and mad at my close girlfriends for being possessive of my friendship. i suppose it is called human nature and how one reacts to spending time with one another. all of my friends both male and female have been there for me in some very difficult times in my life and i know i can depend on them for anything and vice versa. also knowing so much about them is like having another sibiling and i welcome that with open arms. i am not going to toss them out of my life for wanting something more from me but i am not going to lead them on to think that one day i will.
 
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zonelistener said:
Maybe it is just the type of people you guys hang out with. :shrug:

I don't know, the guys i hang out with typically divide their time between hanging out at nudie bars and viewing hardcore pornography on the net; if it helps, my best guy friend's favorite shirt reads: The Sex Psychic Said You're Gonna Do Me.

Hmmm. What do you think Zonelistener?

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Oh wait, just for clarification: :sexywink:
 
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