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Old 04-11-2008, 11:17 PM   #706
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But it would also be unfair to him.

To be a bit crass, bros before hos.
I agree with that 100%. I made the indecision of doing something similar in the past. The relationship ended (because it was, after all, a high school relationship) and so did the friendship. All three of us ended with nothing.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:17 PM   #707
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Fix'd
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:18 PM   #708
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precisely. sucks about the girl, and her sending mixed signals is not cool. she should't be toying with you two like that.
She was probably just horny and wanted a 3-way.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:18 PM   #709
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Put yourself in her position. If she isn't interested in you nothing happens but if she is then at least she makes the choice. Your friend is the unfortunate victim whether you tell her or not. Friends shouldn't have other friends in pain.
What??? Are you serious? A friend going after a friend's significant other is all sorts of fucked up. Do you not value your friendships at all?
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:19 PM   #710
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:19 PM   #711
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Quote:
Originally posted by phillyfan26


But it would also be unfair to him.

To be a bit crass, bros before hos.
What about you in all this? It isn't right that you bite the bullet and don't act. She deserves to make the choice and you deserve to get if off your chest. That's my opinion at least. Don't let yourself go on never knowing. Trust me that is no way to live.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:19 PM   #712
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Put yourself in her position. If she isn't interested in you nothing happens but if she is then at least she makes the choice. Your friend is the unfortunate victim whether you tell her or not. Friends shouldn't have other friends in pain.
Your last two sentences say that he is the victim, but I shouldn't have him in pain.

It's contradictory. I could just as easily say, put yourself in his position: he just started a relationship with a girl he clearly likes. His friend tells his new girlfriend that he's into her? How fucking horrible is that for him?
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:19 PM   #713
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But it would also be unfair to him.

To be a bit crass, bros before hos.
i agree. i would be livid if i was dating someone and my friend decided she liked him and started moving in on him.

unfortunately, in my opinion, the only thing you can do is wait it out and see if you still like her when they break up.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:20 PM   #714
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What??? Are you serious? A friend going after a friend's significant other is all sorts of fucked up. Do you not value your friendships at all?
I guess it is the ideal of the romantic, and Screwtape is a romantic. I don't agree with it, though.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:21 PM   #715
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Well, she has a boyfriend. My buddy is her boyfriend. She's hung out with us two nights in a row and is sending incredibly mixed signals to everyone. I've no idea what the hell is going on.

Apparently she's now aware that I'm into her, though.
My advice:

Stay the fuck away until he's completely out of the picture. And yes, in all likelihood, they will split eventually. But you need to have patience and let things play out naturally, or you'll look really desperate/rude. And that's simply not attractive.

Besides, as you said so eloquently, bros before hos. You'll be interested in many women during your lifetime, but people that you genuinely connect with are pretty rare.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:21 PM   #716
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What??? Are you serious? A friend going after a friend's significant other is all sorts of fucked up. Do you not value your friendships at all?
Stop. I'm not telling Pfan to seduce her or try to break them up. I just believe he should tell her his feelings. That is only fair to the two of them.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:21 PM   #717
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love your guitar btw
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:23 PM   #718
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What about you in all this? It isn't right that you bite the bullet and don't act. She deserves to make the choice and you deserve to get if off your chest. That's my opinion at least. Don't let yourself go on never knowing. Trust me that is no way to live.
They're in high school. How many high school relationships last? PFan, don't do it. Because seriously, a high school relationship isn't worth losing a friend over. Especially one if the girl had no qualms about leaving her former for you--it makes her less committed, in my mind, to the already non-commital high school dating scene.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:23 PM   #719
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My advice:

Stay the fuck away until he's completely out of the picture. And yes, in all likelihood, they will split eventually. But you need to have patience and let things play out naturally, or you'll look really desperate/rude. And that's simply not attractive.

Besides, as you said so eloquently, bros before hos. You'll be interested in many women during your lifetime, but people that you genuinely connect with are pretty are.
'Tis exactly what I was going to do, as a matter of fact. This is just complicating it a little bit.
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:23 PM   #720
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Quote:
Originally posted by phillyfan26


Your last two sentences say that he is the victim, but I shouldn't have him in pain.

It's contradictory. I could just as easily say, put yourself in his position: he just started a relationship with a girl he clearly likes. His friend tells his new girlfriend that he's into her? How fucking horrible is that for him?
You are all three victims. Telling her is fair to you, her and your friend. That's all I'm saying.
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