Anyone ever done a phobia course/session?

[Angela Harlem]

I'm doing one for spiders, and to be honest, the thought petrifies me. I have to talk about them, think about them, for hours. Hours. I can even touch one at the end if I want to. Haha. If I want to. Anyway, the psychologist who runs this reckons the course is very successful. My fear is impacting on my life. I do need to do something, but even doing something scares me. It means I have to address them, and I'm scared even thinking about them.

Has anyone ever done something like this, and does it work?

Please dont move this to confessionals, by the way. I dont want to talk about the phobia itself. I want to hear if people have overcome them, and how, if they did.

 

[Liesje]

I've had a phobia of spiders since I was a baby. I don't know why, since bugs, snakes, amphibians and such don't bother me. My bedroom in my college house was infested with several species of spiders. Once I was climbing into bed only to pull back my sheets and find a spider three inches in diameter on my pillow. Another time I woke up because something was ticking my hip and it was a spider. As a little kid, I would wake up feeling paralyzed because I was covered in spiders and webs. It was like dreaming while conscious.

If the class works, let me know what things you did. I've gotten a little better by just being exposed to them more frequently, but I HATE them so much I can't even kill them myself. I actually get feelings of rage when I see a spider, like I'm mad at them for looking like a devil and scaring the shit out of me. I wish I could get over it, it's pretty embarrassing for me.

 

[angelordevil]

I'm doing one for spiders, and to be honest, the thought petrifies me.

I feel awful now, after pretending to be a spider in that other thread

I guess I’m fortunate, in that my phobias are pretty limited. The only ‘issue’ I’ve had is with extreme shyness, so I guess that is a certain phobia...social phobia. While I was going to university, it was so bad that I would feel horribly claustrophobic and uneasy in the midst of large crowds. I’d walk in to the library, for example, and just keep my head down to avoid any kind of mass interaction. I was always fine with one-on-one situations, but the crowd thing, including public speaking, was very difficult.

To make a long story short, the big change for me happened during my grandfather’s funeral service, of all places. I ended up giving a eulogy, and then wouldn’t shut up. All this stuff just poured out of me, and the minister actually had to whisper in my ear to “wrap it up.” Apparently he had a wedding to attend.

Fear can be an interesting thing...it can force you to surrender to it, but it can also force you to be inventive. In that vein, I’d say the surround-yourself-with-spiders approach could be very effective. Good luck!

 

[Angela Harlem]

it's ok angel/devil, i'll just pretend to be many people at once. a crowd of me!


...ok, there was an idea for retalitation in there somewhere!

i've spoke to this dude on the phone already and he says that the issue is not the thing you are afraid of but the fear itself. one of us is not understanding, as it is actual spiders that paralyse me with fear. we have a pre-session on tuesday. he also needs to make sure i dont have a heart condition incase i drop dead or faint or something. he'd started going through how bad my fear is, but he said 'we'll cut it short. we can discuss it at length in person'. i was only halfway through the scenarios which make me nearly pee myself, like not putting my feet on the floor when sitting in a chair for fear of the imaginary spiders which are waiting to crawl on my (usually) bare feet, peaking around doors in toilets to make sure none are up on the walls just waiting to attack me.

i'll let you know what happens. i'm hoping someone on here has done one before so i can get an idea of how the hell someone can 'cure' chronic fear! i just don't understand it.

 

[angelordevil]

it's ok angel/devil, i'll just pretend to be many people at once. a crowd of me!


...ok, there was an idea for retalitation in there somewhere!

Stop staring at me...all of you!!!


What about hypnotism for your spider-fear?

 

[Angela Harlem]

i dont know if i believe in hypnotism either

i'm chronically unbelieving in nearly everything!

 

[blueeyedgirl]

Dunno if it's helpful but Ruth Ostrow's column in this weekend's Australian colour supplement was about "catastrophising" ie thinking the automatic worst about any situation. And fear is part of that, ie thinking the automatic worst about spiders. Maybe that's what the bloke was on about, the fear itself.

 

[BonosSaint]

i dont know if i believe in hypnotism either

i'm chronically unbelieving in nearly everything!

Except imaginary spiders.

I thought of going to class for some of my phobias (like driving),
but the thought of the class scared me more than the phobia.

I have absolutely no helpful advice to give you.

 

[MissMaCo]

Do we have to fight against all our fears? I mean, is it so terrible to be afraid of spiders as long as you can just avoid them as much as possible?

Good luck Anna

 

[BonoIsMyMuse]

Once I was climbing into bed only to pull back my sheets and find a spider three inches in diameter on my pillow.

I'm not as afraid of spiders as I used to be, but that one would've sent me screaming and running away for sure.

I've often thought about taking a class to help me get over my fear of flying. I didn't fly for the first time until I was 22 and moved about a thousand miles away to go to grad school, so for a long time it was simply fear of the unknown. Then I was on a plane that had to make an emergency landing, and that brought back my fears and made them even worse.

Right now I'm still at a point in my life where I can get away with not flying too much, since I'm still in school and can't really afford it, but as someone who really wants to see the world, I know I'm going to have to get over my fear sooner or later.

Good luck with your class!

 

[GibsonGirl]

Hope it works out for you, Angela. Of my three biggest phobias (the others being vomiting and fish) I'd say my spider phobia is the worst. I cannot be in the same room as a spider. Doesn't matter how big or small it is, I'm still terrified.

It was worse in South Africa, where we got a lot of poisonous varieties. When I was small, a baboon spider somehow managed to get into our flat. I wailed and wailed...my father couldn't do anything about it, because he's terrified of spiders too. My mother had to get rid of it and it had a go at her. It didn't bite her, thankfully. Another time, I found a button spider on one of my toys in the garage. Again, I wailed and wailed and wasn't able to bring myself to play with that toy ever again. I thought it had laid eggs in it and that they'd hatch and swarm all over it.

Then, in the Middle East, we got camel spiders! One camel spider got stuck in my ceiling light and ran around in there for a few days before it fried up. Turning on your light, only to see the silhouette of a giant, dead camel spider is not very fun. When my parents had gone to bed, I used to sneak into the lounge and sleep there, because I was too ashamed to tell them I couldn't sleep where the spider was. My mother eventually found out what had happened, and I was only able to sleep in my room after she'd removed it.

The spiders aren't so bad in Canada. We get harmless garden spiders that build their webs in the windows around houses and buildings. Even so, I'm just as terrified of them as I am of button spiders, baboon spiders and camel spiders. I'd really like to say I don't freak out like a kid when I see them, but...

Ugh, I have to stop. I'm getting goosebumps even posting in this thread. Hope it all works out. Maybe you can give me some pointers!

 

[LMP]

I have a paralyzing fear of cockroaches. It's maybe the only thing that scares me more than being stabbed or crazy demon faces.

 

[LemonMelon]

I'm scared of spiders too. Those little buggers...

One thing that might help your fear is to watch one of those hilariously bad spider-based monster films from the 60's. It's one of the least scary things imaginable.

 

[AtomicBono]

Except imaginary spiders.

I thought of going to class for some of my phobias (like driving),
but the thought of the class scared me more than the phobia.

I have absolutely no helpful advice to give you.

I'm scared of driving too i havent driven in weeks...i keep avoiding it... I'm not as nervous driving myself but I'm afraid of driving other people, getting into wrecks or just getting lost and looking like a moron...

I don't know if i have a phobia of spiders but I certainly don't like them. little ones don't bother me much, but ones like what GibsonGirl was describing... bugs are really creepy to me in general, with a few exceptions (i'm in love with praying mantids )

 

[Liesje]

I'm not as afraid of spiders as I used to be, but that one would've sent me screaming and running away for sure.

I didn't touch it. I made my friend's boyfriend capture it in a jar and let it go far away from the house. It was so big and ferocious, I was afraid to kill it! If I find smaller ones, I point them out to the cats (they know the word "spider") and have them take care of it.

My housemate was also deathly afraid of them. I won't touch them, but I don't run around shrieking. I tried to desensitize her by buying a pack of plastic ones and sporadically placing one on the toilet seat, dangling from a thread in her door way, on her pillow, etc.

 

[KhanadaRhodes]

i'm deeeeeeeeeeathly afraid of spiders. i mean srsly. i always feel crazy when i talk about how irrational my fear of them is. but i will say one time when i was 12 or 13, while home alone, i locked myself in my room all day because there was a daddy long legs (who yes, even then i knew wasn't technically a spider) was on the wall in the hallway.

i don't know how i'm going to get through playing zelda:twilight princess

 

[yolland]

he says that the issue is not the thing you are afraid of but the fear itself. one of us is not understanding, as it is actual spiders that paralyse me with fear.

I've never done a phobia course and couldn't tell you how they work, nor am I certain I've ever had any fears which truly qualified as 'phobias,' but I can, from personal experience, find a lot of truth in what he says. Ever since I was a kid, I've been considerably more frightened than most by stinging insects--bees, wasps, hornets etc. I think this was probably provoked by an incident I witnessed as a toddler where my mother was gardening, accidentally disturbed a ground-wasps' nest, screamed as several of them suddenly shot up at her, and as a result wound up with them flying into her mouth and delivering some nasty internal stings. The noise and chaos terrified me, and that association with stinging insects stuck. I've never been plagued by fears of 'imaginary' bees, and on the one occasion 10 years or so later where I did get stung by a wasp (never even saw it), I had to admit it didn't hurt all that much. Still, up until pretty recently, I found myself unable to persist with whatever I was doing if there was a bee around, yet loath to get close enough to kill it at the same time.

What finally happened was that a few years ago, I was hiking with my family along Lake Superior when I apparently stepped on a wasps' nest, and suddenly found myself dive-bombed by a dozen or so of them. Memories of what I'd seen happen to my mother came flooding back and I promptly broke Rule #1 of safe outdoorsmanship: Don't Panic. I panicked, went blindly plunging down the (steep, scree-covered) slope, and predictably wound up slipping, falling and tearing some ligaments in my foot. Really, I was lucky to have not injured myself worse, but as it was it pretty much ruined the rest of our vacation, and my ankle is now permanently weaker and more injury-prone as a result.

What that brought home to me, and I think this may be what the psychologist is saying, is that there's nothing a bee or wasp could do to me that's worse than what I could do to myself (or worse, someone else--my kids could've been hurt trying to help me, for example) by panicking like that. So now, every time I see one, I immediately remind myself of that, take a few deep breaths, then force myself to continue with business as usual. It wasn't those wasps that 'paralyzed' me, it was my own fear and that much, I can control.

I have to admit I haven't tried 'touching' one since then (well, other than to kill them when I find them in the house, which I do now find it much easier to do). I have no plans to make a pilgrimage to an apiary anytime soon. Still, given the chance...I'd have to say I'd recommend anyone else with this problem give that route a try, rather than risk learning the necessity of mastering their fear the hard way (or worse) like I did. It truly wasn't worth it. I can't tell you how many times my brain has sheepishly apologized to my ankle for permanently f***ing it up over something that, at worst, might've given me a few annoying skin welts for a couple days.

 

[Angela Harlem]

Ouch, yolland, that sounds nasty. I wonder if that is some kind of primary stage phobia or something, though. Fear is fear. The only difference between yours and mine, for instance, is mine is absolutely irrational, has developed out of nowhere (ie, no specific incident), but at the root of it is still that same plain and simple 'flight' instinct that we're all capable of (though fym might disagree on it beibng an instinct!).

I've cancelled the first appointment which was to be this morning but it's rescheduled for next week. I'll give an update on how it goes if anyone is interested. I have to admit I am very curious as to how exactly someone can coach you into gaining control of something which has always been a lot stronger than you and has essentially beaten you at every chance.

Thanks everyone for the input. It's very appreciated. It's also nice to know the ridiculous level of fear we face is not actually abnormal and a few people have it!

 

[Justin24]

I'm afraid of Ferris Wheels. There evil!!!

 

[GibsonGirl]

I'm afraid of poor grammar.