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Old 01-29-2008, 11:14 PM   #151
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OMG when Paula burped, or hic-cuped , or whatever that noise was....!!!!
Simon's face...that was
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Old 01-29-2008, 11:18 PM   #152
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Has Simon being taking happy pills this year or something?

He's been oddly.. not pure nice.. but near pleasant

Yea the hiccup was hilarious

"You disgusting pig"

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Old 01-30-2008, 10:12 AM   #153
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American Idol-Omaha, Nebraska Auditions

American Idol has held auditions in big cities like New York, Los Angeles, and Chicago. But now they are in the heartland, Omaha, Nebraska. Will we find talent we can totally embrace, or will we point and laugh Omaha-ha-ha. But hey, where’s Paula? Is “plane is late” code for “bombed out of her skull?”

Chris Burnheisel has waited seven seasons to audition for American Idol. And he came bearing gifts. Randy and an absent Paula get stuffed animals. Simon gets a jacket. Chris shows off his Kelly Clarkson photo album. Simon places it on the judging table as a good luck charm for Chris. Chris sings “Since U Been Gone” with some pretty bad gymnastic moves. He wanted auditioning to be life altering. Too bad it’s more life faltering. Still, Chris is a sweet kid. And who knows, maybe he’ll get a Idol finale red carpet gig with Omaha’s very own Fox 42. But do we really need another Ross, the Intern?

Jason Rich is a from a small town in Iowa. Aren’t all towns in Iowa small? Jason is very cute (eye candy, yum) and seems like a nice guy. But can he sing? He sings “When You Say Nothing at All.” He keeps forgetting the lyrics. Jason is very lucky the judges are actually in a good mood and gets more chances than he probably deserves. Finally, he gets it together. His voice is good, but something bugs. Could it be that he’s too bombastic? Well, it doesn’t matter what I think because Jason is going to Hollywood.

So glad you could make it Paula...

Idol treats us to a new game show. “You Forgot the Lyrics.” And boy, do they ever. Many compete for the prize but only one person can win. A leather-hatted idiot wins the grand prize. But I seriously doubt he won a golden ticket.

Rachel Wick used to be a female arm wrestler. She even challenges Ryan. Wow, nice guns, Ryan. In front of the judges, Rachel sings “Don’t Tell Me to Stop Loving You.” I think she sounds good, but the judges think she is too twangy. However, Rachel is going to Hollywood, but not before she arm wrestles Paula. Yea, that’s a fair fight.

Sarah Whitaker used to be a professional wrestler. Hey, me too! She fulfills Simon’s dream by backhanding Ryan. Sarah sings something incredibly unrecognizable. Could anyone help me here? Sarah is too weird for words. Maybe she’s Alexis Cohen’s cousin. Hey, didn’t Bon Jovi have a hit with a song called “Omaha?”

Ryan trades places with Paula. Ryan is going to judge, and Paula is going to...well, whatever Ryan does. Samantha Sidley is a victim of this little experiment. She lacks confidence, but she sings “I Don’t Know Why” with a warm, husky voice I like. She’s told she needs to get better stage skills, but she does grab a golden ticket. I’m going to keep my eye on her. I hope she doesn’t bomb in Hollywood.

Elizabeth, Denise and Michael blow the judges away and are going to Hollywood. However, Elizabeth thinks she’s on her way to America’s Next Top Model. Tyra Banks says, “That would be fierce!”

From Kenosha, Wisconsin comes Angelica Puente. She has many daddy issues and lives with her grandma. Not to be mean, but sometimes I wish these people would save the drama for Oprah. Still, Angelica is just a kid, and I like that she comes to the audition in non-hoochie wear. The judges notice Angelica’s nerves. Simon tells her to picture Randy in a bikini. Great, now Angelica is going to toss her cookies. Angelica sings “Power of Love.” Well, she’s very loud, and she has no sense of self. She’s more of an imitation. But who knows where she’ll be in 5-6 years. Despite this, Angelica is going to Hollywood. A call is made to her dad. He’s very proud. Aww.

Oh, that DAUGHTRY! He’s such an inspiration. Many rockers come out from smoky bars, Hot Topic and mom and dad’s basement to audition for Idol.

David Cook combines a faux hawk with some Manic Panic Ruby Red streaks. He tells us that he brings something different to the AI table. He sings the Bon Jovi classic, “Allentown, “ oops, I mean “Livin’ on a Prayer.” Paula looks at Davis like he’s a big bottle of Tanqueray gin. David is a good singer, but lacks strong performing skills. Still, he gets a golden ticket. And I couldn’t help but notice how cute he is. Oh goody, more AI eye candy.

Johnny Escomilla says he’s the weirdest guy you’ll ever meet. Well, I won’t argue with that. Johnny is about to audition for the judges when, speaking of Tanqueray gin, Paula let’s out a huge hiccup. Klassy! Johnny sings the old classic, “Shout.” I want to shout, “Shut up!” His shiny jacket is blinding me, and now that I’ve heard him sing, I wish I was deaf. Nope, no golden ticket to go with Johnny’s golden jacket.

Now we’re treated to a montage of bad auditioners singing Stealer Wheel’s “Stuck in the Middle With You.” Remember that scene in Reservoir Dogs? Yep, this was worse.

Leo Marlowe is funny and snarky. Hey, my kind of person! He sings “A Song for You” made notable when Elliott Yamin sang this song back in season 5. Thankfully, Leo sounds really good. He’s both talented and likable. I look forward to seeing more of him.

In the end 19 happy people got golden tickets. Still, I was left wanting after the Omaha auditions. Could it be that no delusional loser had an expletive-laced meltdown after being rejected by the judges?

Next audition stop? Sunny Miami!
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Old 01-30-2008, 10:24 AM   #154
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I loved Leo, thought he was adorable. He's like a butch Clay Aiken, without the asshole personality
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Old 01-30-2008, 11:09 AM   #155
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Awesome recap Golightly!
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Old 01-30-2008, 03:18 PM   #156
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I loved seeing people from Wisconsin auditioning. And making it through to Hollywood!

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Old 01-30-2008, 09:23 PM   #157
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That was a good episode. I thought there were a lot of talented singers tonight. Corliss and Brittany (sp?) (It's the way I spell it, so I'm going with it ) were my favorites of the evening, but I liked a lot of the people who auditioned tonight. That last guy freaked me out tremendously, though.
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Old 01-31-2008, 12:10 AM   #158
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I'm not a violent person, but man, I wanted to punch that American Juniors girl.

What a little snot!
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Old 01-31-2008, 12:35 AM   #159
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Miss Precocious
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Old 01-31-2008, 08:17 AM   #160
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She was AWFUL, possibly the most offensive contestant ever. She'll probably end up being famous, the next generation Paris/Britney/Lindsay only worse.
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Old 01-31-2008, 10:42 AM   #161
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American Idol-Miami Auditions

American Idol goes back in time and comes to us Miami Vice-style. What? American Idol couldn’t come to us Golden Girls-style? Sophia Petrillo says, “Picture it. Miami, American Idol auditions, 2007.”

Shannon McGough is the first to audition. She looks like a Claire’s Boutique vomited all over her. This must the be week of “Girls Gone Gross” on Idol, and Shannon treats us to her belching repertoire. She sings “Cry” and is totally affected and obnoxious. She just can’t find the melody of the song. She’s like the theater geek version of Janis Joplin. Shannon doesn’t get the golden ticket. She’ll go back to the meat market of her parents and not the meat market of Hollywood.

Look, it’s Brett Michaels from Rock of Love! Nope, it’s actually Robbie Carricco. He has a pretty decent voice and is going to Hollywood. His friends celebrate by spraying silly string all over him. If this was really Brett Michaels from Rock of Love, he’d be sprayed with STD-laden panties.

Ghaleb claims to be 27 and has so much passion to give. He also looks like he’s wearing a wig from the Sanjaya collection. Ghaleb has a decent voice but is more suited to the Latino market. Still he gets the golden ticket and gets to feel up Paula. This is probably the best thing that will happen to Paula all day.

BFFs Corlis and Brittany look like the Weather Girls 2: Electric Boogaloo. And they’re showing all the boys some love. But can they show the judges they can sing? Corlis sings “Take 5” and dedicates it to her favorite dawg, Randy. Corlis has a fine jazzy voice, but I did detect a lisp? Brittany sings “My Guy.” She’s also in good voice, and has fun, flirty performing skills. Corlis and Brittany are going to Hollywood.

Suzanne Toon, like many before her, brings her own sad sack story. She sings “I Can’t Make You Love Me’ with a very sultry, sexy tone. She gets a golden ticket.

Ramiele is cute as a button and would love to be the first Asian Idol winner. She sings “Natural Woman” and her big voice belies her petite stature. Simon says she’s too much of a hotel singer. Hmm, I bet if Ramiele was a blonde WASP he wouldn’t say that. Fortunately, Randy and Paula say yes. Ramiele is on her way to Hollywood. I hope she proves that good things come in small packages.

Syesha Mercado is beyond adorable with an infectious smile. She tells us that good things keep coming her way. Hmm, maybe she read “The Secret.” Syesha’s dad has just graduated from rehab. But a tragic back story doesn’t mean she has talent. Syesha sings “Think.” Being loud isn’t always good, but Idol always has a couple of R & B divas. It’s no “secret.” Syesha gets the golden ticket.

After a couple of singing montages, both good and bad, we meet Richard Valles. He sings through his nose.

Remember the show American Juniors? Me neither. But apparently that forgotten show is where Julie “What does precocious mean?” Dubella got her start. She sings “Me and Bobby McGee.” She’s totally melodramatic and seriously needs to get over herself. The judges reject her, and she just can’t believe it. And why is she talking with a “I summer on Cape Cod” lockjaw? Simon nails it when he calls her over-indulged. Julie, please keep in mind that AI filled its obnoxious teen-age girl quotient when they gave abstinence chick, Amy Catherine Flynn, a golden ticket last week.

Our final Miami auditioner is Brandon Black. And no, AI did not save the best for last. Oh geez. Just shut up Brandon. He sings “I’ll Make Love to You” and is completely tedious and is trying too hard to be memorable instead of actually being talented. He sings an original composition “I’m the Next American Idol.” Can we please bring back Reynaldo Lupaz’s AI classic “We are Brothers, Forever?” Brandon is not going to Hollywood. Now we know why Paula drinks.

17 people got golden tickets, and soon we will see them in Hollywood. Next week Idol goes back to the south. Atlanta is the next audition city.
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Old 02-01-2008, 09:03 AM   #162
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I didn't hear that it had to be pretaped, I wonder why. Because Paula can't sing?


msnbc.com

Sneak peak at Abdul’s halftime show


Despite the disappointing news that Paula Abdul’s upcoming Super Bowl performance had to be pretaped, there’s still plenty of buzz surrounding the “Idol” judge’s stage presence.

According to a source involved with the pretape, Abdul is excited to unveil a new look by makeup artist Mezhgan that will leave viewers “shocked.” What can you expect? “She’ll be wildly sexy” is all the source would say.

But one thing is certain: Abdul’s relationship with QVC played a part in the transformation. If you saw Abdul’s reality show “Hey Paula,” you know that her relationship with the television retailer seemed, um, contentious at times. However, Abdul must have had some cache with the network because Mezhgan will appear on QVC after the big game to sell the products she used on Abdul.
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Old 02-01-2008, 10:45 PM   #163
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Quote:
Originally posted by Golightly Grrl


Remember the show American Juniors? Me neither. But apparently that forgotten show is where Julie “What does precocious mean?” Dubella got her start. She sings “Me and Bobby McGee.” She’s totally melodramatic and seriously needs to get over herself. The judges reject her, and she just can’t believe it. And why is she talking with a “I summer on Cape Cod” lockjaw? Simon nails it when he calls her over-indulged. Julie, please keep in mind that AI filled its obnoxious teen-age girl quotient when they gave abstinence chick, Amy Catherine Flynn, a golden ticket last week.

Ohhh...I was hoping that imp didn't make it through. And I forgot that Catherine girl got through last week but I think I'll look forward to her crashing to defeat!
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Old 02-05-2008, 08:09 PM   #164
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Okay... that first guy chose a great song by Queen, performed it really well and Simon doesn't like his eyes??? What a fucktard! The judges are the worst thing about this show.
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Old 02-05-2008, 09:02 PM   #165
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Overall, tonight's show wasn't that bad I guess. Entertaining, lol. I'm surprised nobody's commenting.
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