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Old 07-21-2004, 01:47 AM   #1
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69 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3.Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing Football; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him " I need some tampons!!"

6. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.

7. Try on bras over top of your clothes. 8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms

9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "sex and candy"

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all on and turn the volumes to "10".

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.

17. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

24. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask,"Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

31. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

33. Take bets on the battle described above.

34. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect)

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission: Impossible."

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: "Marco Polo."

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.

45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

46. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them

47. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

49. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

51. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good Bessie."

52. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles

53. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.

54. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

55. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

56. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

57. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)."

58. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

59. Redress the mannequins as you see fit.

60.When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.

61.Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

62.Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

63. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

64. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

65. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

66. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."

67. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

68. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it.

69. Drive around the entrances screaming out the window "the British are coming! "
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Old 07-21-2004, 04:43 AM   #2
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Re: 69 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

Quote:
Originally posted by icelle
5. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him " I need some tampons!!"
...oh, lord...

Quote:
Originally posted by icelle
8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms

9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "sex and candy"

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all on and turn the volumes to "10".

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask,"Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission: Impossible."

40. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: "Marco Polo."

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.

46. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them

47. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

49. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

54. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

55. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

56. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

57. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)."

64. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

65. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

67. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

68. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it.
...these were my personal favorites. Whole list was funny, though.

I love these kinds of lists-I found one of fun things to do at a fast-food restaurant once and a list of 10 ways to torture your roommate. .

Angela
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Old 07-21-2004, 07:22 AM   #3
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These are great I wish I had the courage to do any of these LOL
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Old 07-21-2004, 08:11 AM   #4
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lmao my friends and I do number 1 all the time! We will walk around the store filling carts with everything we want and then we will leave it someplace. One of my friends LOVES to go get ice cream, put in his cart and leave it on the other side of the store in automotives. That way by time anybody discovers the cart the ice cream is a dripping mess.
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Old 07-21-2004, 10:32 AM   #5
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A typical day at the West Covina Wal-Mart????
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Old 07-21-2004, 12:28 PM   #6
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Icelle-you have Too much time on your hands!!!Lol! I love #3, 5, 10, 2o and 40 and 41!! You missed ur calling, should be on last comic standing!!! hee
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Old 07-21-2004, 12:57 PM   #7
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first of all i didn't even know that there were 69 things to do icelle! Did you make that list up yourself? If so can I cross post it in another MB?
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Old 07-21-2004, 12:59 PM   #8
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mullen girl, just go to a walmart where no one knows you.

love town i admit to playing those games.
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Old 07-21-2004, 02:44 PM   #9
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Quote:
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
THIS IS EVIL!
I've worked in stores like that where you have to take the cart around and put all the crap back that ppl were too lazy to do themselves.
Trust me, a 9 hour shift of 6 carts overflowing with various items and you having to wander the store putting it in it's proper place is not cool.
ANything but that, I still have nightmares
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Old 07-21-2004, 02:47 PM   #10
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Ah yes, the adventures of fah and the mini fahs at Walmart are now here on Interference.

Thanks now I''m having flashbacks
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Old 07-21-2004, 04:48 PM   #11
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yeah, being a retail worker myself I would only do the ones that don't involve making the underpaid wal-mart worker's lives even harder than it already is.
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Old 07-21-2004, 06:36 PM   #12
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lol I've seen that somewhere before.. I think via email

Funny shit!
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Old 07-21-2004, 08:18 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by LoveTown
One of my friends LOVES to go get ice cream, put in his cart and leave it on the other side of the store in automotives. That way by time anybody discovers the cart the ice cream is a dripping mess.
LOL, oh, my god...gee, how nice...

I do have to sympathize with the retail workers who could be bugged by this stuff-I could just hear my mom now if anybody actually did any of these things at the store she works at (actually, come to think of it, she told me the other day about a person who set all the radios in the store to a certain station and had them all blaring at once).

Still...these lists are funny to read....

Angela
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Old 07-21-2004, 08:39 PM   #14
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Luckily enough we don't have any giant crapmarts over here 'across the pond', but walmart did take over asda (the cheapest, shittiest supermarket chain) and made it even more shitty (and we have to shop there... ), though not really any cheaper...we still don't have hypermegamarkets like you get in the USA, but the question is for how much longer...?
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Old 07-22-2004, 07:54 AM   #15
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I might actually try on bras in the sewing department at wal mart..over my clothes ofcourse,
some of those ladies in that department seem so .....ugh.........
someone get that lady an enima

i can just imagine someone doing that though.....

ya ever watch Trigger Happy TV?
its hilarious when that guy carries around that huge cell phone?

lol
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