2011 AFL Thread - Melbourne: The suckiest sucks that ever sucked

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Goddamnit, I keep thinking it's Friday and footy time, then being sorely let down when I realise it's Thursday.
 
cobl04 - 7/117
bonnie - 7/116
inte - 8/116
vlad - 8/116
axver - 6/109
danny - what are you on at work mate?

collingwood, hawthorn, carlton, essendon, brisbane, west coast, sydney, geelong
 
Goddamn I'm doing badly. How am I a full 7 behind now? You sure you didn't miss counting a week? (I can live in hope.)
 
Demetriou - "one club in particular I won't mention a couple of players were congratulated by police because they asked a young girl questions seeking consent in one incident. The education is working"

:rolleyes: shouldn't this be the norm? How does this call for celebration?
 
St Kilda seemed to play really well for half of each quarter.
 
A little late, but yeah, I would have picked Collingwood anyway, like everyone else:

Collingwood
Hawthorn
Carlton
Brisbane
Essendon
West Coast
Sydney
Geelong
 
Oh boy, I'm really starting to feel sympathetic towards Port. I haven't seen a bottom placed side play so haplessly and without any sort of fight before.
 
The motherfucking Axver All-Stars would be doing a better job.

The amazing part is the amount of opportunities Hawthorn have blown. Should've scored at least three or four more goals in the first quarter alone.
 
Fucking hell, Carlton. 16 behinds? Between this and the North Melbourne game, it's pretty clear that their accuracy will be what prevents them from making it very far in the finals. Geelong, Collingwood and Hawthorn are all in a different league of efficiency. If they could have capitalized on even half of those 16 wasted scoring opportunities, they would be embarrassing Freo...who are an embarrasing club this season.

Betts is the bright spot of this match. I want his jersey ASAP.
 
I'm honestly disappointed Hawthorn couldn't have converted one of those behinds into a goal to nudge them past 200. Port are a disgrace, and look positively terrified of being inside the attacking 50. It was just sad seeing their players looking buggered before the first quarter was even over ... by the final quarter, the only thing stopping Hawthorn scoring more were their own mistakes!
 
Port Power very much resemble Fitzroy circa 95-96 (interestingly, when Primus played for them) and they were the only two seasons where Fitzroy were crap as a symptomatic consequence of their off-field problems.

They are pretty abysmal. I wouldn't hesitate to put money on Gold Coast in a head to head against Port Power, even if Ablett Jnr was missing.
 
I think the truly incredible part of this is that four years ago, Port were in the grand final, and seven years ago, they were premiers. What the flying fuck happened?!
 
interesting proposal by Malthouse that i'd probably support:

My three-tiered solution to put an end to blowout wins | The Australian

Definitely an idea worth considering, I think. You would still end up with situations like the Western Bulldogs this season (as they would've been in the top group per last year's results and then had the shit kicked out of them by the other top five), but you would avoid some of these horrendous, useless maulings and probably foster team development much better. I mean, let's just take Port here. If their games against Collingwood and Hawthorn had been against Melbourne and Richmond, they may not have won, but they would've gone out there feeling like they could stay in the game, maybe make their own luck, and come away with something worthwhile. What Hawthorn did to them today is basically the equivalent of kicking a man when he's down (not that I mean to say the Hawks shouldn't have pulverised them).
 
It's not a perfect solution unfortunately... because you're still going to have blowouts, though admittedly not as many. Like all the teams still have to play each other. I think a promotion/relegation system would be good, but I'll never live to see that happen, I'm sure.
 
How many teams do you reckon we'd need for a promotion/relegation system? Twelve in each league? So an extra six on now? Or could we get away with just ten per league and simply add teams for Tassie and the Territory to bring it up to the requisite twenty total?

In rugby union, New Zealand's NPC, before the daylights got raped out of it about five years ago, had three divisions with a total of twenty-seven teams and promotion/relegation. Some seasons they all had nine teams, some seasons they were 10/9/8 to try to avoid byes in all but one division.
 
Yeah I spose it'd work with 20... Tasmania (though I don't think they're anywhere near getting a team, particularly with Hawthorn so well ensconced) and NT. 20 rounds, all teams play each other twice... but it would be so hard to create interest in the second tier.
 
The second and third divisions of the NPC were reasonably well followed back in the day, but yeah, they paled compared to the first division and it was rare for a promoted team to be competitive.

That said, if you added Tassie and NT to the GWS and the current bottom seven (Port, Gold Coast, Brissie, Richmond, Adelaide, Bulldogs, Melbourne), you'd be starting with a damn good following. The trick would be keeping it, ensuring the skill levels are not too dissimilar to the first division, and that promoted teams have a chance. Can it be done? The AFL probably wouldn't mind it in the end because at finals time, it'd be a handy little earner, with BOTH divisions running right through to the last week.

It'd never happen. If the re-organisation/destruction of the NPC taught me anything, it's that teams will fight tooth and nail to be kept in the top division and will use every legal means available to them. So this is the problem - keep expanding the AFL until you get to having enough teams for two divisions, but then NOBODY will be willing to go down to the second tier.
 
Essendon, I only ask two things of you tonight:

1. WIN!
2. Don't get any more motherfucking injuries!
 
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