The amusing low down on seating at the Grammys

[Giant Lemon]

I saw this on atu2.com and thought it was pretty amusing. Enjoy!

Answer Guy

From: John

I saw U2 got front-row seats at the Grammy Awards. Can you explain how they do seating arrangements at the awards show?

Dear John:

Yes I can. I'm Answer Guy.

Like the Oscars and Emmys, the Grammy organizers want the high-profile acts to sit in easily accessible places. The top acts usually get a front row or aisle seat. Bono, being the highest-profile musician since John Lennon dissed Jesus Christ, was seated in the front row and on the aisle. The single most prestigious seat in the Staples Center. He was placed there for good camera coverage, the ability to high five younger, hipper musicians, and most importantly so that his 41-year-old body could make the five foot walk up the stairs to collect the armful of awards that U2 was sure to win.

Next to Bono was his beautiful wife Ali. She looked fetching in a black dress with the navel somehow cut out of it. Her attitude was "back off Britney and Christina, hands off Janet, I haven't lost a step." It was refreshing to see someone looking good who was born before man walked on the moon.

Next to Ali was Edge, somehow looking cool even though he was wearing a knit cap indoors in Los Angeles. He was given a "day at the spa" by Ray Romano.

Next to Edge was Morleigh, also dressed in black, with a wild hair style that said, "not only can I dance better than you, but I'm clearly more fertile."

Larry was grimacing and frowning next to Morleigh and to his right was his longtime companion Anne. If you have this on video, you may want to freeze frame it as this is the last time you will see her for at least another decade.

To Anne's right was Adam's assigned seat. But strangely he was only in it when the category was one in which U2 was nominated. During different shots of the band, Adam's seat was filled by an Asian woman, a blonde, and most shockingly, a 7 foot black man with dreadlocks (I suspect it was Shaq).

Ever since U2's 1987 Grammy for The Joshua Tree, when Adam was actually in the bathroom when the award was announced, he has decided to now spend the entire awards show in the restroom, except when an award is eminent. It also appears that he arrived stag, so he could have been trying to find a date to take to the post-party at Edge and Morleigh's Malibu abode.

Directly behind Ali sat the fifth member, Paul McGuinness who is every bit as powerful as the other four, but not as well known and not quite as photogenic.

In a slap in the face to the eventual winner of Album of the Year, the entire producing staff and musicians featured on the O Brother Where Art Thou? soundtrack were seated ten rows back in the center of the section. By the time they all got up onstage, the house band had started in with the "hurry your speech up" music.

 

[WildHonee]

------------------
~*Mona*~

LOVE me, give me SOUL
Kick start my rock 'n rollin? heart. ~J.E.W.

"I think I just said I was smart there - I'm sorry about that." ~Bono

?Naughty pop star? ~Bono Get on the Boos

 

[sulawesigirl4]

yeah, I read that today. Funny.

 

[madonna's child]

Yeah, I read that yesterday. The Answer Guy is always hilarious.

------------------
"I have a dragon, and I know how to use it. I'm a donkey on the edge!" -Shrek

All That You Can't Leave Behind is my album of the year.

Love,
Emily

Visit my webpage for U2 wallpapers:
www.geocities.com/springtime5348/index.html

 

[Lilly]

Originally posted by Giant Lemon:
I saw this on atu2.com and thought it was pretty amusing. Enjoy!

Answer Guy

1. Next to Edge was Morleigh, also dressed in black, with a wild hair style that said, "not only can I dance better than you, but I'm clearly more fertile."

2. Directly behind Ali sat the fifth member, Paul McGuinness who is every bit as powerful as the other four, but not as well known and not quite as photogenic.

That's great.
1. She can't dance better than me! *does a jig* Oh wait, EVERYONE can dance beter than me....

2. He indeed, is not the most photogenic man around...sorry to the P, but yea, you don't see his fans looking to make a cardboard cutout of him, now do ya?

------------------
Proud owner, maker and baker of THE U2 cookies.

 

[elevatedmole]

Originally posted by Lilly:
That's great.
1. She can't dance better than me! *does a jig* Oh wait, EVERYONE can dance beter than me....

2. He indeed, is not the most photogenic man around...sorry to the P, but yea, you don't see his fans looking to make a cardboard cutout of him, now do ya?

lol... Paul McGuinness reminds me of Steve Madden. Ick.

------------------

"You must not look down on someone just 'cos they are 14 years old. When I was that age I listened to the music of John Lennon and it changed my way of seeing things, so I'm just glad that 14 year olds are coming to see U2 rather than group X." - Bono, 1988

 

[Naya]

lol !

 

[AM]

Answer Guy
Ever since U2's 1987 Grammy for The Joshua Tree, when Adam was actually in the bathroom when the award was announced, he has decided to now spend the entire awards show in the restroom, except when an award is eminent. It also appears that he arrived stag, so he could have been trying to find a date to take to the post-party at Edge and Morleigh's Malibu abode.

------------------
"The bass player's got it. The bass player's fucking got it." Bono, Boston 6-9-01

 

[YellowKite]

Originally posted by Giant Lemon:
To Anne's right was Adam's assigned seat. But strangely he was only in it when the category was one in which U2 was nominated. During different shots of the band, Adam's seat was filled by an Asian woman, a blonde, and most shockingly, a 7 foot black man with dreadlocks (I suspect it was Shaq).

Ever since U2's 1987 Grammy for The Joshua Tree, when Adam was actually in the bathroom when the award was announced, he has decided to now spend the entire awards show in the restroom, except when an award is eminent. It also appears that he arrived stag, so he could have been trying to find a date to take to the post-party at Edge and Morleigh's Malibu abode.
b]

[/B][/QUOTE]

Those random people were probably seat fillers. Can you imagine the joy - sitting in Adam's seat and next to the rest of the band?! I want that job!




------------------
Mone

You ain't nothin without a rhythm section.

"Who's to say what it is will break you."

"What Adam does with his willy is his business..." -Bono

 

[JennyBean]

Originally posted by Giant Lemon:
It also appears that he arrived stag, so he could have been trying to find a date to take to the post-party at Edge and Morleigh's Malibu abode.

Next time he needs a date he can call me! LOL! That whole thing was hilarious.