Originally posted by wildhoney22:
You mean he's not a Smooth Criminal?
*weeps*
MONA AND MATT LAUER NOW BRING YOU A SPECIAL REPORT
*********STATE OF EMERGENCY*************
NAKED JUSTICE 2002: THE CRISIS.
MATT LAUER: We have just recieved word that the ageless drummer of U2, Larry Mullen Jr, aslo known as Lawrence, Smooth Criminal....and....eh...hunka hunka burnin' waxed love who likes to bang-- MONA, who wrote this?
MONA: It's from the wire, man. Pass me a danish, would ya? Listen, if you're not up to this, I can always get Mitch Albom.
MATT LAUER: Rackem frackem....
ANYWAY apparently Mr. Mullen has begun to grow some hair of some kind. And, Mona, this is unusual, you say?
MONA: That's right, Mr. Lauer. Er, Matt. You see, Larry is of a special breed who neither ages nor really functions comepletely as a human.
MATT LAUER: SO, what you're saying, then, is that Larry Mullen is--
MONA: Some kind of flippin' Dorian Gray DemiGod or SOMETHING.
MATT LAUER:....is THAT from the wire, too?
MONA: Quiet, you.
MATT LAUER: Now, Mona, as all of our viewers know, you are QUITE the U2 fan.
MONA: YES. YES, I am. Why? Why, is-- is Bono here for me to interview?
MATT LAUER: NO. Just tell us, what could this revelation MEAN to U2 fans?
MONA: Well, we're not comepletely certain that that IS in fact hair on Larry. I mean it's obvious that the picture was not one that Larry was expecting. It looks like someone shot that from behind some shrubbery.
MATT LAUER: ...
MONA: Moonie started it. Em...
But we've sent out a special team, and they're working on it. I mean, they're investigating to find the truth of it all. If it IS in fact hair, it is yet to be determined whether or not it's a good thing for U2 fans. On one hand, it would be a sign of testosterone.
MATT LAUER: *blush* Um...
MONA: On the other hand, it would prove that Larry is human.
MATT LAUER: Well..
MONA: Oo...And he'd also probably be able to run a lot slower because of the friction that hair creates....we could chase him down...
MATT LAUER: *ahem* We'll be right back with our advice segment with Dr. Bluey.
Who let you IN the studio, anyway?
------------------
~*Mona*~
LOVE me, give me SOUL
You give your life for rock n' roll