Effanbee
The Fly
Free Falling
Chapter 10
She sat at my kitchen table, Mrs Hewson, composed and confident. A shaft of sun highlighted her dark hair, her beautiful face. Her clothes were simple but stunningly cut, complimenting her clear eyes and flawless skin.
This is so unfair, I thought. I am looking like a bag-lady while she looks perfect. I took a jug of iced water from the fridge and brought it to the table. We eyed each other and I waited stubbornly for her to speak first.
‘I’m sure you know why I’m here,’ said Alison. Even her voice was lovely, with an accent just to remind me she came from the same place as Bono.
‘If you’re looking for Bono, he’s in the city,’ I replied in my own unlovely accent.
‘I know where he is. It’s you I wanted to see,’ said Alison. She paused, took a sip of water. ‘If I’m to lose my husband, I need to …’ she faltered for a moment. ‘… to meet the woman …’ Alison left the sentence hanging, raising her glass to her lips again, her composure slipping just a little.
I chose my words very carefully. ‘I don’t know what Larry has told you … it was Larry, wasn’t it?’ Alison acknowledged this with a nod. ‘I will be truthful with you and tell you as much as you want to know.’
‘Thank you for that,’ Alison said.
‘Bono came here because he felt he had nowhere else to go. He was half-dead with worry, stressed to breaking point. What has happened between us wasn’t planned. I did not lure your husband away to seduce him and he didn’t come here with that in mind.’
‘But it happened anyway,’ said Alison, her face no less lovely for the tears which ran down her cheeks.
I got up, grabbed a box of tissues and handed them to her. Why do you have to be such a nice person? I thought. I want to hate you, but I can’t.
Alison blew her nose and looked at me openly. ‘So where do we go from here?’ she asked. ‘Has Bono told you what he’s going to do? We’ve parted before, briefly, but he’s always come home in the past. I … I can’t imagine life without him, we’ve been together for so long …’
I gave her a moment to regain control. ‘He hasn’t told me what he’s decided to do. I don’t think he has decided,’ I said. ‘I told him he should try to mend things between you,’ I added reluctantly.
Alison looked at me curiously. ‘Why ever did you tell him that? It’s not exactly in your best interest, is it?’
I sighed. ‘I believe it’s the best thing for him. I’m not keyed in to his world - all I can offer him is a mundane life. And my love for him. Which appears to be incidental to everything else,’ I said bitterly. I got up again and stood looking out of the window.
‘You have a very generous heart,’ Alison said quietly. ‘If Bono had to fall in love with someone else, I’m glad it was you. He always did speak highly of you, I often wondered if there was something there, wanted to see this mysterious woman.’
‘No mystery,’ I said. ‘Just an ordinary woman who was too weak to resist temptation.’ I went back to the table. ‘I believe he will come back to you and your family, if you’ll let him. Will you forgive him, give him that chance?’
Alison paused before she replied. ‘This is very strange. I came here not knowing what I’d find. I was ready for a fight, I have to admit. Yet I can’t hate you.’
I nodded, indicating I felt the same way about her.
‘It’s obvious you genuinely love him,’ Alison continued. ‘You’re not just infatuated or attracted to the fame and fortune.’
‘That side of it doesn’t appeal to me at all. Scares the hell out of me, actually,’ I admitted. ‘I’d attract the enmity of thousands of people all over the world - it would damage Bono, threaten all his good work. He knows it, too.’
‘You love him for himself, not what he stands for,’ Alison confirmed.
‘Yes. The man behind it all. I’d have felt the same way if he was a … a … road-digger or something.’ I fought for control, swallowing tears.
A sound from the yard made us both look up, Alison’s face was lit with anticipation.
‘Roo, where are you angel?’ Bono called from the hallway.
‘Kitchen,’ I called back.
Bono breezed in, all energised from the city. He stopped short at the sight of Alison. Their eyes met and I may as well have been on Mars. They were the only people in the room.
I felt the last brave flame of hope within me flicker and die. I got up and left, bumping into Adam and Edge in the hall.
‘Roo, you look like you’ve seen a ghost,’ said Adam.
‘Just a glimpse of things to come,’ I said vaguely. ‘We have a visitor.’
Larry was at the front door, looking at me with a mixture of guilt and defiance. He came towards me. ‘Roo …’ he began.
‘Don’t you come near me, Larry Mullen,’ I hissed at him. ‘I swear, I’ll swing for you.’ I pushed past Larry and ran down the steps. He followed me and grabbed my arm.
‘Roo, it was for the best. It had to be resolved …’
‘Take your hands off me. Get AWAY from me, Larry.’
Larry stepped back. ‘Roo, I’m sorry you’re so angry and hurt …’
I took a step towards him, literally seeing red. ‘I don’t want your pity,’ I spat out. ‘And you have not seen even the beginning of my anger … I will never forgive you for this, never!’
‘It would have happened anyway,’ Larry tried to reason with me, but I was way beyond reason and in a world of hurt.
‘Yes, it would - in its own time.’ My voice was rising to match my blood pressure. ‘But you just had to interfere. He would have gone back to her, don’t you see? Now you have taken away the time I had left with him. You couldn’t even let me have that, could you?’
‘It would have been more difficult, the longer it went on,’ Larry pointed out.
I dismissed that truthful statement. ‘And what if Bono decides he doesn’t want to be pushed into a decision? If he feels railroaded, who knows what he’ll do? Why couldn’t you leave him to come round to it by himself?’ I turned and marched off into the back yard.
Leaning against the barn, breathing the sweet smell of hay, I waited for the anger to subside. It took a while before I could begin to think rationally again, before my hands stopped shaking and my heart slowed down again. I went back into the house by the back door, avoiding the kitchen, into my bedroom and shut the door.
I pulled Bono’s suitcase from under the bed and began to gather up his possessions which were scattered across the room. The finality of the situation began to sink in, and I sat on the bed among the piles of clothes, inertia replacing the false energy of anger.
A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts. Bono came in, closing the door behind him. I didn’t know what to say to him, all the words log-jammed in my head. So I just looked at him dumbly.
Bono sat on the bed. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, shaken to the core, as always, when he was near me.
‘I wouldn’t have put you in that situation for the world,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry you had to go through it.’
‘I’m not angry with you, Bono,’ I told him. ‘I did take it out on Larry, though.’
‘He’ll survive,’ said Bono laconically.
‘It was a good thing I met Alison,’ I said. ‘When I saw her, so beautiful, so perfect, it made me realise I’d been deluding myself. You belong together - she loves you, you’ve shared most of your lives. No-one in the world could match that.’
‘No-one’s perfect,’ said Bono quietly. He looked down at his hands. ‘Has it occurred to you that she may not want me back?’
‘Alison wants you back, Bono.’
‘On her own terms, perhaps. I have to listen to her, we have to talk and see where it takes us. We may not agree.’
‘I think you will, and probably come out of it stronger than ever.’
‘I find it very hard to get my head round - you’re being so understanding …’
‘Well, what do you want me to do, Bono?’ I said with a flash of anger. ‘Break down and cry? Get on my knees and beg you to stay?’
Bono raised his head and the anguish in his eyes instantly doused my anger. I saw that he was uncertain and afraid, and I wanted to comfort and reassure him. I took his hand.
‘You can do this, Bono. You have the strength. I believe in you, you’re the only thing I have left to believe in.’ I looked into his eyes, the depthless blue eyes that would haunt my dreams forever. ‘There is one thing I’ll ask of you, before you go.’
‘Whatever it is, it won’t be enough. I’ll do everything I can for you, Roo …’
‘Then promise me you’ll come and tell me what happened. Please don’t take off and leave me here in limbo.’
‘Nothing left unsaid, right?’
‘Right. It’s up to you to contact me. I don’t even know where you’ll be …’
‘We seem to have rooms at the Hilton,’ Bono said with a shrug. ‘Of course I’ll see you again, Roo. Did you really think I’d just up and go?’
‘Not for sure,’ I said with the ghost of a smile. ‘Go on now, Bono. Give it your best shot - and don’t worry about me.’
Bono stood up and leaned over to kiss me softly on my forehead. ‘I will, though. Worry about you. I’ll see you soon, OK?’
******
I stayed in my room until the light passed out of the day, not crying, not eating or drinking, not even feeling much. The need for the bathroom finally prompted me to move, and I took a long shower, letting the water beat down on my head, washing away the bitter dust.
I shuffled into the sitting room in my bathrobe. My brain dimly registered that the lamps were on, then I realised that Edge was there, sitting on the sofa with the cats, reading a book.
‘Oh, Edge. I didn’t think anyone else was here,’ I said, confused.
Edge gave me a kind smile. ‘I thought you might like some company tonight,’ he said, closing the book and gently removing cats from about his person. ‘Sit down, Roo, let me get you something to eat and drink.’
Edge’s kindness came close to undoing me. Feelings were beginning to creep back and I didn’t want to feel anything. I curled into the corner of the sofa and accepted the food and drink with thanks, but couldn’t bring myself to eat anything.
‘Do you not need to be at the hotel, with everyone else?’ I asked Edge.
He shook his head. ‘To be honest, Roo, I’d rather not be there. It may get, shall we say, heated. I’ll be more use to you here - Adam will probably be acting as referee between Bono and Larry. Dealing with confrontation is not one of my best talents.’
‘Nor mine,’ I said with a shudder. ‘Especially after the last few days. What with earthquakes and obituaries and now this, I’m just about running on empty.’
Edge asked me who’d died and I found myself telling him the whole story. Edge listened patiently, sympathetically, letting me ramble on until the tale was told.
The phone rang. ‘Do you want me to get that?’ asked Edge.
‘Please,’ I said gratefully. ‘If it’s anyone but Bono, tell them I’m dead or something.’
Edge answered the phone. ‘Yeah, she’s here, mate. She’s doing just fine. Yes, I am looking after her.’ He handed me the phone.
‘Roo, how are you going?’ Bono’s phone voice, capable of raising the dead, I thought.
‘Everything’s fine, Bono,’ I said. ‘I have a wonderful Edge here who is treating me like royalty. What about you?’
‘Slow going,’ said Bono, sounding weary. Voices in the background. ‘Yeah, OK. I’ll be there in a minute,’ Bono yelled back. ‘I just had to find out if you’re alright.’
‘Stop worrying about me, Bono. I really am fine. And much better for hearing your voice.’ More noise in the background.
‘Gotta go,’ said Bono with a sigh. ‘Speak to you soon, angel. Take care.’ He rang off.
‘Well, things are happening,’ I said to Edge. ‘I do wish Bono would stop worrying about me though.’
‘Of course he’s worried,’ said Edge gently. ‘I’m not very good at saying things like this, but, well, Bono never takes on anything lightly. He does everything 110%, including solving problems with people he loves.’
‘And saving the world,’ I added.
‘Oh, yes. That too. But he never loses sight of what some might call the lesser things.’
I thought this over and saw that Edge was right. Bono had a heart of infinite size and he did not forget people whose lives had touched his, however briefly.
Chapter 10
She sat at my kitchen table, Mrs Hewson, composed and confident. A shaft of sun highlighted her dark hair, her beautiful face. Her clothes were simple but stunningly cut, complimenting her clear eyes and flawless skin.
This is so unfair, I thought. I am looking like a bag-lady while she looks perfect. I took a jug of iced water from the fridge and brought it to the table. We eyed each other and I waited stubbornly for her to speak first.
‘I’m sure you know why I’m here,’ said Alison. Even her voice was lovely, with an accent just to remind me she came from the same place as Bono.
‘If you’re looking for Bono, he’s in the city,’ I replied in my own unlovely accent.
‘I know where he is. It’s you I wanted to see,’ said Alison. She paused, took a sip of water. ‘If I’m to lose my husband, I need to …’ she faltered for a moment. ‘… to meet the woman …’ Alison left the sentence hanging, raising her glass to her lips again, her composure slipping just a little.
I chose my words very carefully. ‘I don’t know what Larry has told you … it was Larry, wasn’t it?’ Alison acknowledged this with a nod. ‘I will be truthful with you and tell you as much as you want to know.’
‘Thank you for that,’ Alison said.
‘Bono came here because he felt he had nowhere else to go. He was half-dead with worry, stressed to breaking point. What has happened between us wasn’t planned. I did not lure your husband away to seduce him and he didn’t come here with that in mind.’
‘But it happened anyway,’ said Alison, her face no less lovely for the tears which ran down her cheeks.
I got up, grabbed a box of tissues and handed them to her. Why do you have to be such a nice person? I thought. I want to hate you, but I can’t.
Alison blew her nose and looked at me openly. ‘So where do we go from here?’ she asked. ‘Has Bono told you what he’s going to do? We’ve parted before, briefly, but he’s always come home in the past. I … I can’t imagine life without him, we’ve been together for so long …’
I gave her a moment to regain control. ‘He hasn’t told me what he’s decided to do. I don’t think he has decided,’ I said. ‘I told him he should try to mend things between you,’ I added reluctantly.
Alison looked at me curiously. ‘Why ever did you tell him that? It’s not exactly in your best interest, is it?’
I sighed. ‘I believe it’s the best thing for him. I’m not keyed in to his world - all I can offer him is a mundane life. And my love for him. Which appears to be incidental to everything else,’ I said bitterly. I got up again and stood looking out of the window.
‘You have a very generous heart,’ Alison said quietly. ‘If Bono had to fall in love with someone else, I’m glad it was you. He always did speak highly of you, I often wondered if there was something there, wanted to see this mysterious woman.’
‘No mystery,’ I said. ‘Just an ordinary woman who was too weak to resist temptation.’ I went back to the table. ‘I believe he will come back to you and your family, if you’ll let him. Will you forgive him, give him that chance?’
Alison paused before she replied. ‘This is very strange. I came here not knowing what I’d find. I was ready for a fight, I have to admit. Yet I can’t hate you.’
I nodded, indicating I felt the same way about her.
‘It’s obvious you genuinely love him,’ Alison continued. ‘You’re not just infatuated or attracted to the fame and fortune.’
‘That side of it doesn’t appeal to me at all. Scares the hell out of me, actually,’ I admitted. ‘I’d attract the enmity of thousands of people all over the world - it would damage Bono, threaten all his good work. He knows it, too.’
‘You love him for himself, not what he stands for,’ Alison confirmed.
‘Yes. The man behind it all. I’d have felt the same way if he was a … a … road-digger or something.’ I fought for control, swallowing tears.
A sound from the yard made us both look up, Alison’s face was lit with anticipation.
‘Roo, where are you angel?’ Bono called from the hallway.
‘Kitchen,’ I called back.
Bono breezed in, all energised from the city. He stopped short at the sight of Alison. Their eyes met and I may as well have been on Mars. They were the only people in the room.
I felt the last brave flame of hope within me flicker and die. I got up and left, bumping into Adam and Edge in the hall.
‘Roo, you look like you’ve seen a ghost,’ said Adam.
‘Just a glimpse of things to come,’ I said vaguely. ‘We have a visitor.’
Larry was at the front door, looking at me with a mixture of guilt and defiance. He came towards me. ‘Roo …’ he began.
‘Don’t you come near me, Larry Mullen,’ I hissed at him. ‘I swear, I’ll swing for you.’ I pushed past Larry and ran down the steps. He followed me and grabbed my arm.
‘Roo, it was for the best. It had to be resolved …’
‘Take your hands off me. Get AWAY from me, Larry.’
Larry stepped back. ‘Roo, I’m sorry you’re so angry and hurt …’
I took a step towards him, literally seeing red. ‘I don’t want your pity,’ I spat out. ‘And you have not seen even the beginning of my anger … I will never forgive you for this, never!’
‘It would have happened anyway,’ Larry tried to reason with me, but I was way beyond reason and in a world of hurt.
‘Yes, it would - in its own time.’ My voice was rising to match my blood pressure. ‘But you just had to interfere. He would have gone back to her, don’t you see? Now you have taken away the time I had left with him. You couldn’t even let me have that, could you?’
‘It would have been more difficult, the longer it went on,’ Larry pointed out.
I dismissed that truthful statement. ‘And what if Bono decides he doesn’t want to be pushed into a decision? If he feels railroaded, who knows what he’ll do? Why couldn’t you leave him to come round to it by himself?’ I turned and marched off into the back yard.
Leaning against the barn, breathing the sweet smell of hay, I waited for the anger to subside. It took a while before I could begin to think rationally again, before my hands stopped shaking and my heart slowed down again. I went back into the house by the back door, avoiding the kitchen, into my bedroom and shut the door.
I pulled Bono’s suitcase from under the bed and began to gather up his possessions which were scattered across the room. The finality of the situation began to sink in, and I sat on the bed among the piles of clothes, inertia replacing the false energy of anger.
A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts. Bono came in, closing the door behind him. I didn’t know what to say to him, all the words log-jammed in my head. So I just looked at him dumbly.
Bono sat on the bed. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, shaken to the core, as always, when he was near me.
‘I wouldn’t have put you in that situation for the world,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry you had to go through it.’
‘I’m not angry with you, Bono,’ I told him. ‘I did take it out on Larry, though.’
‘He’ll survive,’ said Bono laconically.
‘It was a good thing I met Alison,’ I said. ‘When I saw her, so beautiful, so perfect, it made me realise I’d been deluding myself. You belong together - she loves you, you’ve shared most of your lives. No-one in the world could match that.’
‘No-one’s perfect,’ said Bono quietly. He looked down at his hands. ‘Has it occurred to you that she may not want me back?’
‘Alison wants you back, Bono.’
‘On her own terms, perhaps. I have to listen to her, we have to talk and see where it takes us. We may not agree.’
‘I think you will, and probably come out of it stronger than ever.’
‘I find it very hard to get my head round - you’re being so understanding …’
‘Well, what do you want me to do, Bono?’ I said with a flash of anger. ‘Break down and cry? Get on my knees and beg you to stay?’
Bono raised his head and the anguish in his eyes instantly doused my anger. I saw that he was uncertain and afraid, and I wanted to comfort and reassure him. I took his hand.
‘You can do this, Bono. You have the strength. I believe in you, you’re the only thing I have left to believe in.’ I looked into his eyes, the depthless blue eyes that would haunt my dreams forever. ‘There is one thing I’ll ask of you, before you go.’
‘Whatever it is, it won’t be enough. I’ll do everything I can for you, Roo …’
‘Then promise me you’ll come and tell me what happened. Please don’t take off and leave me here in limbo.’
‘Nothing left unsaid, right?’
‘Right. It’s up to you to contact me. I don’t even know where you’ll be …’
‘We seem to have rooms at the Hilton,’ Bono said with a shrug. ‘Of course I’ll see you again, Roo. Did you really think I’d just up and go?’
‘Not for sure,’ I said with the ghost of a smile. ‘Go on now, Bono. Give it your best shot - and don’t worry about me.’
Bono stood up and leaned over to kiss me softly on my forehead. ‘I will, though. Worry about you. I’ll see you soon, OK?’
******
I stayed in my room until the light passed out of the day, not crying, not eating or drinking, not even feeling much. The need for the bathroom finally prompted me to move, and I took a long shower, letting the water beat down on my head, washing away the bitter dust.
I shuffled into the sitting room in my bathrobe. My brain dimly registered that the lamps were on, then I realised that Edge was there, sitting on the sofa with the cats, reading a book.
‘Oh, Edge. I didn’t think anyone else was here,’ I said, confused.
Edge gave me a kind smile. ‘I thought you might like some company tonight,’ he said, closing the book and gently removing cats from about his person. ‘Sit down, Roo, let me get you something to eat and drink.’
Edge’s kindness came close to undoing me. Feelings were beginning to creep back and I didn’t want to feel anything. I curled into the corner of the sofa and accepted the food and drink with thanks, but couldn’t bring myself to eat anything.
‘Do you not need to be at the hotel, with everyone else?’ I asked Edge.
He shook his head. ‘To be honest, Roo, I’d rather not be there. It may get, shall we say, heated. I’ll be more use to you here - Adam will probably be acting as referee between Bono and Larry. Dealing with confrontation is not one of my best talents.’
‘Nor mine,’ I said with a shudder. ‘Especially after the last few days. What with earthquakes and obituaries and now this, I’m just about running on empty.’
Edge asked me who’d died and I found myself telling him the whole story. Edge listened patiently, sympathetically, letting me ramble on until the tale was told.
The phone rang. ‘Do you want me to get that?’ asked Edge.
‘Please,’ I said gratefully. ‘If it’s anyone but Bono, tell them I’m dead or something.’
Edge answered the phone. ‘Yeah, she’s here, mate. She’s doing just fine. Yes, I am looking after her.’ He handed me the phone.
‘Roo, how are you going?’ Bono’s phone voice, capable of raising the dead, I thought.
‘Everything’s fine, Bono,’ I said. ‘I have a wonderful Edge here who is treating me like royalty. What about you?’
‘Slow going,’ said Bono, sounding weary. Voices in the background. ‘Yeah, OK. I’ll be there in a minute,’ Bono yelled back. ‘I just had to find out if you’re alright.’
‘Stop worrying about me, Bono. I really am fine. And much better for hearing your voice.’ More noise in the background.
‘Gotta go,’ said Bono with a sigh. ‘Speak to you soon, angel. Take care.’ He rang off.
‘Well, things are happening,’ I said to Edge. ‘I do wish Bono would stop worrying about me though.’
‘Of course he’s worried,’ said Edge gently. ‘I’m not very good at saying things like this, but, well, Bono never takes on anything lightly. He does everything 110%, including solving problems with people he loves.’
‘And saving the world,’ I added.
‘Oh, yes. That too. But he never loses sight of what some might call the lesser things.’
I thought this over and saw that Edge was right. Bono had a heart of infinite size and he did not forget people whose lives had touched his, however briefly.
Woohoo!! Now gotta go read it before dinner burns!!!
Lucky thing she didn't come out of the shower in the nude, thinking she was alone in the house. 
And naughty Larry; 
always the serious one... Still, I guess you need someone serious to even up the reckless...
I knew it was Lardence!
