Bono Attacks Madonna Adoption Critics

[thankyou]

BONO ATTACKS MADONNA ADOPTION CRITICS

Rocker BONO has applauded MADONNA for adopting Malawian baby DAVID BANDA, and attacked those who criticised her for "giving him a better chance in life". The U2 frontman is baffled by the negative publicity surrounding the singer and husband GUY RITCHIE's rescue mission for the one-year-old. Speaking in Australia - where U2 are currently on tour - Bono says, "Madonna should be applauded for helping to take a child out of the worst poverty imaginable and giving him a better chance in life. "Baby David is lucky to have been adopted by someone who can give him a chance of survival in this world and I don't think it's fair that people are criticising her." He also dismisses criticism of the couple's decision to adopt a child with living family - baby David has a father and grandmother - insisting it doesn't make him any less needy. The 46-year-old adds, "About 20 years ago when my wife ALI and I went to Africa, shortly after LIVE AID, a man who quite clearly loved his child came up to us and begged us to take him. "It's totally heartbreaking but he asked us to take his child home with us because he couldn't feed him. This happens all the time in parts of Africa where unthinkable poverty means people simply can't feed their children."
13/11/2006 02:07

 

[U2isthebest]

Thanks for that!! He said everything I feel too. I'm sick of people criticizing Madonna, especially for this.

 

[Liesje]

Madonna quote I posed in the other thread:

"It was one f–ing thing after the next, everywhere we went. So the idea that people think I got a shortcut or an easy ride is absolutely ludicrous. I have never worked so hard for anything in my life, and I've never been given such a hard time. And my celebrity has worked against me in every way."

If you're a famous person who's trying to make a difference in the world, you'd better be prepared to find yourself in the headquarters of hell."

What (the media) should care about is that there are over a million orphans in Malawi, and following me around is just a gross misappropriation of attention and money."

Also, as for the people saying this was a PR stunt because she didn't adopt an American baby, I found this interesting:

- only THREE orphans from Malawi were were allowed to be adopted out in 2005. (obviously WAY more American kids were adopted)

- also this from an adoption site

The even more galling thing is that Africa's orphans are still mostly unwanted anywhere else in the world, and that includes the U.S. Last year nearly 21,000 immigrant visas were issued to Americans that adopted orphans from other nations. Ethiopia with a paltry 441 orphans that Americans took in was the only African country that cracked the top ten list. Liberia and Nigeria were the only other African nations among the top 20 nations with 182 and 82 orphans Americans took in.

 

[Butterscotch]

What I was wondering is why did she choose a child with a family instead of an AIDS orphan? Surely there must be orphanages overflowing with neglected and forgotten orphans.

 

[Galeongirl]

Because David came from an orphanage.... his father couldn't take care of him, but now it got all the media attention he suddenly wants his boy back....

 

[verte76]

I'm really glad Bono did this. I think Madonna is really getting a raw deal on this. She's trying to help this kid and she's getting slammed for it. It's just not right.

 

[Liesje]

What I was wondering is why did she choose a child with a family instead of an AIDS orphan? Surely there must be orphanages overflowing with neglected and forgotten orphans.

There are both. When I visited northern Tanzania, ALL of the orphanages we went to were children that ran away ("street kids") and were coaxed into the orphanage rather than the street, or kids who's families simply could not take care of them, either because of hardship, the death of one parent, or special needs of the child. An "orphan" is any child who has no parents OR does not have a primary caregiver - the mother. Most AIDS orphans do have family, and some even still have a living parent. Not all orphans are simply abandoned or left alone because the entire family is dead.

The boy's father has publicly stated it is his will the boy be adopted by Madonna. Madonna has publicly stated she did not use her celebrity status to take short cuts. That should be all the explanation we need.

 

[Nuala]

I am sick of people bashing Madonna over the adoption. My husband and I adopted our daughter from China 7 years ago. People still ask me why I adopted from another country when there are children in the USA. I tell them the truth.. that there are too many laws in the US that give the birthparents the right to take the baby back. Now, I am not going to get in a flame war over the rights of birthparents, I totally respect how hard that must be for some to make that decision to have their child be put up for adoption. What I am saying is that after having 3 miscarriages and the doctor telling me I would never have biological children that if I DID manage to adopt a child I sure as HELL wasn't giving it back!! There is no way I could have lived through any more loss. We adopted from China because the adoption is finalized in China and she was OURS from then on. There are SO many kids that need homes all over the whole world, each one deserves someone to love them. As for what Madonna said about the adoption being the hardest thing in her life to do I totally agree. It took us over two years just for the paperwork, it was a full time job but SO worth it!!

 

[Liesje]

Thanks for sharing, Nuala. I totally agree. I know one family with 8 kids, 5 are adopted. The last one WAS adopted from within the USA, and just like you said, the grandmother of the child insisted on visitation and such. It became a terrible mess and of course it only HURTS and confuses the child, the one person who's supposed to be protected by the adoption. My mom worked for a local adoption agency for years, so probably half of my friends growing up were adopted. My closest aunt adopted her two kids from South Korea. My neighbor growing up never married and adopted a girl from China. Both my aunt and this neighbor have put forth a tremendous effort in making sure their kids feel accepting, but also connected to their birth-culture. Kate, the Chinese girl, spent weeks in China last summer so her mom could teach her about her country. My Korean cousins celebrated their arrival dates by eating Korean food at authentic restaurants. In my experience, parents of adopted children are NOT parading them around like cute accessories. I'm not sure why it's fair to judge Madonna more harshly because she's a celebrity. Personally, it's very disturbing to me how quickly and sharply we judge the parenting skills and motivations of others.

 

[Butterscotch]

Because David came from an orphanage.... his father couldn't take care of him, but now it got all the media attention he suddenly wants his boy back....

I didn't know that, in the story I saw, they showed the village, and the father was saying he only thought she was going to take him home and educate him and return him to his village.

Could it be the guy is hoping to get money out of this?

 

[Liesje]

I didn't know that, in the story I saw, they showed the village, and the father was saying he only thought she was going to take him home and educate him and return him to his village.

Could it be the guy is hoping to get money out of this?

He said he wanted Madonna to adopt his son. He had second thoughts, but last I read he approved of the adoption. I'm not sure if the part about the boy being educated and actually going back to Malawi was meant to be taken literally. I don't think the father really believes Madonna is taking the kid home for his primary ed and then sending him straight back. The way I read it, it sounded more like he meant he was happy his son would get these opportunities and maybe someday use them to help change their situation back home.

 

[verte76]

He said he wanted Madonna to adopt his son. He had second thoughts, but last I read he approved of the adoption. I'm not sure if the part about the boy being educated and actually going back to Malawi was meant to be taken literally. I don't think the father really believes Madonna is taking the kid home for his primary ed and then sending him straight back. The way I read it, it sounded more like he meant he was happy his son would get these opportunities and maybe someday use them to help change their situation back home.

That's the way I understood the story, too.

 

[BGD75]

I have NO freaking idea why some people need to make such a big deal about this whole Madonna adoption thing. First of all, way too much talk (in the media) is being devoted to this. Second, she has every right to adopt a baby from wherever she wants to. I applaud people who decide to adopt children, ESPECIALLY when that child is of a different race/culture. I was very disturbed to hear that a survey was done (in the US somewhere) and about 70-something percent of people felt that Madonna should've adopted an American baby. To me it is very sad that she is not aplauded for saving a child, but rather criticized that she picked and African shild instead of an American one

 

[U2Kitten]

To me it is very sad that she is not aplauded for saving a child, but rather criticized that she picked and African shild instead of an American one

Oh, no, there are no African American babies in the US needing homes. No deserted babies of crack addicted mothers. No orphanages full of impoverished black children who will most likely never be adopted. Everything here is just perfect!

All the "Save the World" stuff may be fine and noble but it annoys the hell out of me that everyone seems to look on the US as a "rich" country so they need to help another country, but they do not seem to realize that there are millions of poor people right here who need help too. They should not be neglected just because someone somewhere else is worse off.

I live about five miles from an orphanage called the Baptist Childrens Home which is full of African American children no one is rushing to adopt. It is pitiful. I remember taking them cupcakes, candy and punch when I was in high school and our Home Ec class "adopted" them for Halloween. You can save a kid right here, too. Some of these kids might grow up to be in gangs, on drugs, or into crime with no guidance. It is very sad.

 

[Liesje]

Do you have ANY idea how difficult it is to adopt a baby within the US? If not, give it a try, or find a close friend who has, and you'll be singing a different tune.

Also, like I posted earlier, even considering how difficult and risky it is to adopt within the US, the amount of American babies going into adoption and foster homes is still exponentially greater than that of African babies. Off the top of my head I can think of five girls in my close group of friends growing up who were adopted and American born; I can think of one African-born, but her father is a native Ethiopian and her parents lived there, so they probably don't even consider her a "foreign" adoption. I didn't think it was necessary to point out the obvious - anything Madonna does is going to get far more media attention than any other person. Media attention is NOT indicative of the actual data that shows how many children are adopted from where and by whom. Madonna would likely never have been able to adopt a baby in the US, and if she had, she probably would not be able to keep it or let it have a normal childhood without family and "distant relatives" constantly pestering for visitation rights.

 

[Nuala]

U2 kitten, I respect your views and I am not saying that I think orphans overseas deserve help more than US kids do, it is just that the US makes it so hard to adopt them! The laws here really work against the kids in a lot of ways. And if you do manage to adopt them there is always the risk of them getting taken away. It is awful for the adoptive parents to deal with that. Also, as Liesje said, it also hurts and confuses the children. The goal is to get them in a safe and stable environment and that can't happen if they are constantly getting uprooted. When we first looked into adopting we natually thought of US first just because we lived there. We freaked out when the social worker told us that 50% of the time the birth mother would change her mind! Another issue about US adoption is how unbelievably expensive it is. Unfortunetely, adoption has become a big business. Even when you are adopting a foreign child you still have to get a home study and tons of US paperwork before you even start the paperwork for the country you are adopting from. When people ask me how much my child "cost" me I tell them exactly what we paid, $27,000. Almost ALL of the time I get the response that it is HORRIBLE that China made us pay that much for the baby and that they have so many they should be giving them away. Well, I am quick to point out that of that $27,000, China only asked for a $3000 orphanage donation fee. Yes, the rest went to the US adoption agency and home study agency with the exception of a couple thousand for travel to China to pick her up. We are just a working class couple and by no means had $27,000 on hand so we took a loan out on our house. Our daughters adoption will now be paid off in 20 years with the house!!!! She is really the light of our lives though. Sometimes I just sit and cry when I think of all the children in the world who have the same potential as her but will never get the chance to have a family. Each one we help counts though and that is another reason I get mad at the crap about Madonnas adoption. That is ONE more that is safe.

 

[Galeongirl]

one other thing, I don't get why you gals are considering Madonna adopting a US baby, I thought she lived in the UK

 

[Liesje]

one other thing, I don't get why you gals are considering Madonna adopting a US baby, I thought she lived in the UK

I thought so too, but that's just what the media keeps saying she should do. We're just pointing out how difficult it is to adopt within the USA.

 

[Greenlight]

I thought so too, but that's just what the media keeps saying she should do. We're just pointing out how difficult it is to adopt within the USA.

I think it's pretty difficult to do so in the UK as well. I know someone who is an adoption case worker in the social services here. Madonna comes under a different area but the word is that she went through all the official channels without preferential treatment and it's taken a couple a years just to get the UK paperwork sorted out.
I feel sorry that she's got so much bad press about this. Other celebs like Ewan McGregor have adopted from abroad with little press intrusion but I guess that because she is such a big star she gets the lion's share. I just hope though that the baby doesn't get hounded by the press as he grows up.

 

[Galeongirl]

yes I can understand that, but then the media makes no sense. If she should adopt a child in need, she could just aswell take one out of the UK, why make a difference between US and UK?

this whole situation is weird... They should just leave her alone I think, she did something great to a young boy's life, why bash her for it?


it's like how people always bash Bono for everything... never stops...

 

[dietcokeofevil]

Adoption is arguably (assuming that the adoption takes place in a loving home) the most noble occupation out there. We as a human race keep popping out more babies when we don't take care of the ones that are out there.

 

[kimby]

Oh, no, there are no African American babies in the US needing homes. No deserted babies of crack addicted mothers. No orphanages full of impoverished black children who will most likely never be adopted. Everything here is just perfect!

I live about five miles from an orphanage called the Baptist Childrens Home which is full of African American children no one is rushing to adopt. It is pitiful.

I understand your feelings, but from everything I've read and heard about the subject, U.S. adoption agencies have generally discouraged "cross-race" adoptions of African American children by white American couples...using "they won't be exposed to black culture" as an excuse.