AM
Refugee
ever wondered what U2 were like if they were superheros????
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It is a quiet morning in Dublin. The air is heavy with humidity, and people everywhere are praying for these next two days to be over, so that they can relax in the oppressive heat. Our hero wakes up late, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with the heel of his hand and facing his alarm clock. 9:05 am, August 8. Time to get up and face the world. No sooner is he showered and shaved than a loud knock rattles his door. Mystified, our hero opens it cautiously. It is Adam. He wastes no time entering the room, stalking past Edge with a determination that clearly shows he is distraught. Edge has already ascertained that, however, since Adam is not dressed in his usual manner. Neither wacky shirt nor cool sarong adorns Adam today. Instead, he is dressed in tight gold spandex and black combat boots, and stands imposingly in Edge's living room.
Edge : "Why, Adam, you are not yourself today."
Adam : "No, indeed, my friend," Adam replies, his usual cool replaced by an uncharacteristic gravity. "As you can see, a serious matter is at hand. That is why I am dressed as The Amazing, All-Powerful Adam."
Edge : (drawing himself up) "What is it, All-Powerful? Is there an emergency?"
All-Powerful :"Yes. It is a situation so serious that it requires all of our powers combined. Hurry up, then, and change into your super lithium-powered rocket boots." Edge dashes off with lightening speed, returning in milliseconds as Electric Erogenous Edge.
All-Powerful :"There's no time to lose, Electric Erogenous Edge. Let us seek out our superallies immediately!" Instantly, our heroes have zapped into the jazzy pad of Bono the Benevolent Boozer. Boozer is snoozing on his leopard-print couch, snoring loudly. His sidekick, Lovely Larry, is curled up at his feet, thumb in his mouth.
Erogenous :"Oh, look at that. Isn't Lovely Larry cute?"
All-Powerful :"Boozer! Lovely Larry! Awaken, for dark duties await us!"
Lovely Larry is on his feet immediately, smoothing his perfect hair and pulling his shirt down over his well-muscled chest, tucking the ends into his bright orange hot pants. Boozer is somewhat more difficult to rouse, slurring something about his mother and rolling over.
Erogenous :"Bono the Benevolent Boozer, if your itty bitty feet aren't into your platform shoes in ten seconds, I will zap your bottom."
This is enough to get Boozer up, already dressed in his ultra super-duper crime-fighting bullet-stopping energy-conducting woman-fetching red velvet leisure suit.
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check out those stories for a good laugh on http://www.wherethesitehasnoname.com/
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"The bass player's got it. The bass player's fucking got it." Bono, Boston 6-9-01
.
.
.
It is a quiet morning in Dublin. The air is heavy with humidity, and people everywhere are praying for these next two days to be over, so that they can relax in the oppressive heat. Our hero wakes up late, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with the heel of his hand and facing his alarm clock. 9:05 am, August 8. Time to get up and face the world. No sooner is he showered and shaved than a loud knock rattles his door. Mystified, our hero opens it cautiously. It is Adam. He wastes no time entering the room, stalking past Edge with a determination that clearly shows he is distraught. Edge has already ascertained that, however, since Adam is not dressed in his usual manner. Neither wacky shirt nor cool sarong adorns Adam today. Instead, he is dressed in tight gold spandex and black combat boots, and stands imposingly in Edge's living room.
Edge : "Why, Adam, you are not yourself today."
Adam : "No, indeed, my friend," Adam replies, his usual cool replaced by an uncharacteristic gravity. "As you can see, a serious matter is at hand. That is why I am dressed as The Amazing, All-Powerful Adam."
Edge : (drawing himself up) "What is it, All-Powerful? Is there an emergency?"
All-Powerful :"Yes. It is a situation so serious that it requires all of our powers combined. Hurry up, then, and change into your super lithium-powered rocket boots." Edge dashes off with lightening speed, returning in milliseconds as Electric Erogenous Edge.
All-Powerful :"There's no time to lose, Electric Erogenous Edge. Let us seek out our superallies immediately!" Instantly, our heroes have zapped into the jazzy pad of Bono the Benevolent Boozer. Boozer is snoozing on his leopard-print couch, snoring loudly. His sidekick, Lovely Larry, is curled up at his feet, thumb in his mouth.
Erogenous :"Oh, look at that. Isn't Lovely Larry cute?"
All-Powerful :"Boozer! Lovely Larry! Awaken, for dark duties await us!"
Lovely Larry is on his feet immediately, smoothing his perfect hair and pulling his shirt down over his well-muscled chest, tucking the ends into his bright orange hot pants. Boozer is somewhat more difficult to rouse, slurring something about his mother and rolling over.
Erogenous :"Bono the Benevolent Boozer, if your itty bitty feet aren't into your platform shoes in ten seconds, I will zap your bottom."
This is enough to get Boozer up, already dressed in his ultra super-duper crime-fighting bullet-stopping energy-conducting woman-fetching red velvet leisure suit.
.
.
.
.
.
.
check out those stories for a good laugh on http://www.wherethesitehasnoname.com/
------------------
"The bass player's got it. The bass player's fucking got it." Bono, Boston 6-9-01