My analysis is complete. The lab monkeys and myself came up with this answer:
Our society demands instant gratification. Hence we have instant coffee, meals (using the term lightly) in a pouch, instant pain relievers (so they claim), games with instant win features, instant chat features, high speed access to the Internet and a 24-7 Kinkos. We want our automobiles to go faster, our kids to grow up quicker and our web sites to load before we blink. We now use express mail, fly on supersonic jets to arrive quicker and carry cell phones so employers can instantly reach us anywhere, any time. We all have one fax number, two phone numbers, and three email addresses.
At the same time, the internet let's us instantly say what's on our minds without any real recourse. So if we want to make idiot mindless statements like "The Official: North America got Fucked Thread" we can do it. Never mind that we didn't have to submit to an editor, never mind that we didn't think our statement through to its completion. Instead we make off the cuff emotional statements that illicit off the cuff emotional responses. This kind of back and forth is a breeding ground for spin off statements. Like a puddle hatching mosquitoes, topics emerge at an exponential rate, until a forum mod either steps in or the mosquitoes all hatch and fly away.
Last but not least:
1. Pop rulz totally!
2. Popmart rawked 'but didn't start so hot
3. North America so totally didn't get screwed
4. We all suck.
5. We all rulz!!!
6. Keane will rulz as an opener
7. The new stage rawks!!!
OMG ROTF LMAO FMITA SKDFJDFSLKFSDSK SDKJSDFKBJSFDKJBKBJIHIYUYIUIVUKVU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!