HelloAngel
ONE love, blood, life
[SIMG]http://bonovox.interference.com/achtungcarrie/achtungcarriethumb.jpg[/SIMG]
By Carrie Alison, Chief Editor
The fishpond I had in Tallahassee was home to around 10 large goldfish. The number of fish doubled according to the condition of the water, the weather, the season, and if I had remembered to feed them that week. Oh come on, you know you?ve forgotten to feed your fish before too ? especially if they live outside. The problem with remembering the fish (or not, as it were) was solved once I named them. ?Flipper? was an early name, ?Fishy,? ?Funky,? ?Swimmer,? and ?Jaws? were all strong candidates. Nothing gelled, though, until I concocted the ultimate naming plan ? I would name them after members of U2.
But there are only four members of U2. You had 10 fish, Carrie.
Ah yes, what to do to make the most out of four dashing Irishmen with small names? Quadruple them, of course! I had, at given points of time, the following fish: Bono1, Bono2, Bono3, and Bono 4. Edge1, Edge2, Edge3, Edge 4. Larry1, Larry2, Larry?oh you get the idea. Those fish went on to have many babies, and many a full belly.
My U2 naming scheme went on to bigger and better things. You see, early in my U2 fandom, our favorite band was always on my mind. And I do mean ALWAYS. I have found that I take better care of possessions (material or otherwise) if I endear them to me. This endearment is brought on by the use of personification. I greatly admire the members of U2; thusly, I take excellent care of my new shoes.
You have shoes named Adam? Sure I do! I also have a filing cabinet named Inchacore, a computer named Nathan the Rutabaga, and a Kramer guitar named Cherry Rhubarb.
To clarify, my left shoe is named Adam. The right one is just dirty. Have I said too much?
I had a really great pair of boots named Bono once (from Payless, if you must know). They took me everywhere ? all around New York City, dancing in Raleigh and moshing in West Palm Beach. Dare I tell you that Bono and I had a rather fantastic sojourn to the MOMA in Manhattan one year? I felt so light in my step I didn?t notice I was skipping until I nearly tripped and fell onto a guard. Oops!
Those same boots came face-to-face (well, ground-to-stage) with their namesake in 1997 at the PopMart concert in Jacksonville, Florida. My friends and I were 5th row on Edge?s side, with an excellent view of the band as they emerged from the crowd. So taken was I when I saw Bono in person that I bent over and screamed ?Bono!!!!!!? at the ground. My boots were never so happy or so oddly jealous as they were that night.
You still aren?t writing Achtung Carrie!, but I won?t stop asking you. Perhaps you would like to tell Carrie something to write about? Don?t be shy, my loverlies. I see you.
carrie@interference.com is the number to call. I?m waiting.
By Carrie Alison, Chief Editor
The fishpond I had in Tallahassee was home to around 10 large goldfish. The number of fish doubled according to the condition of the water, the weather, the season, and if I had remembered to feed them that week. Oh come on, you know you?ve forgotten to feed your fish before too ? especially if they live outside. The problem with remembering the fish (or not, as it were) was solved once I named them. ?Flipper? was an early name, ?Fishy,? ?Funky,? ?Swimmer,? and ?Jaws? were all strong candidates. Nothing gelled, though, until I concocted the ultimate naming plan ? I would name them after members of U2.
But there are only four members of U2. You had 10 fish, Carrie.
Ah yes, what to do to make the most out of four dashing Irishmen with small names? Quadruple them, of course! I had, at given points of time, the following fish: Bono1, Bono2, Bono3, and Bono 4. Edge1, Edge2, Edge3, Edge 4. Larry1, Larry2, Larry?oh you get the idea. Those fish went on to have many babies, and many a full belly.
My U2 naming scheme went on to bigger and better things. You see, early in my U2 fandom, our favorite band was always on my mind. And I do mean ALWAYS. I have found that I take better care of possessions (material or otherwise) if I endear them to me. This endearment is brought on by the use of personification. I greatly admire the members of U2; thusly, I take excellent care of my new shoes.
You have shoes named Adam? Sure I do! I also have a filing cabinet named Inchacore, a computer named Nathan the Rutabaga, and a Kramer guitar named Cherry Rhubarb.
To clarify, my left shoe is named Adam. The right one is just dirty. Have I said too much?
I had a really great pair of boots named Bono once (from Payless, if you must know). They took me everywhere ? all around New York City, dancing in Raleigh and moshing in West Palm Beach. Dare I tell you that Bono and I had a rather fantastic sojourn to the MOMA in Manhattan one year? I felt so light in my step I didn?t notice I was skipping until I nearly tripped and fell onto a guard. Oops!
Those same boots came face-to-face (well, ground-to-stage) with their namesake in 1997 at the PopMart concert in Jacksonville, Florida. My friends and I were 5th row on Edge?s side, with an excellent view of the band as they emerged from the crowd. So taken was I when I saw Bono in person that I bent over and screamed ?Bono!!!!!!? at the ground. My boots were never so happy or so oddly jealous as they were that night.
You still aren?t writing Achtung Carrie!, but I won?t stop asking you. Perhaps you would like to tell Carrie something to write about? Don?t be shy, my loverlies. I see you.
carrie@interference.com is the number to call. I?m waiting.
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@ naming your shoes...
