I'm so sorry to hear this, belatedly- since i wasn't near any 'puter's till the past few days.
I'm glad you had such a love, and Love like that never truely dies.
You might be feeling a lot more of the pain right now, plus scrambling with the changes such a loss involves.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Having read a bunch about grief in relationship to 9-11 victims (& I 'm a NYC'r), and having lost my sweet mom 6 months back - i've become more familiar with this stuff.
Grief shows up in different stages (which may circle, and return), and manifests differently in each person-- so don't compare yourself to others, if you can. Hopefully you'll be able to grieve as you feel comfortable doing- however that is. Some times it's shows up in ways that surprise/puzzle a person.
Ex: if you're a more reserved person you might find yourself blubbering lot-- please try not to feel embarressed. If you're a talker-- suddenly you might find your self in a bunch of big silences ( where maybe writing stuff down might help).
As they say take it one minute, hour, day at a time....and
remember to take care of yourself.